ptsd PTSD secondary to MST filed

[Andyman73]

Mailed off my PTSD secondary to MST on Monday.

I don't know where to go from here. My life is falling apart around me. My marriage is on the rocks, my work is suffering. I've been in therapy at my VAMC for 2 years now.  I don't know if I will survive. I got a letter that the VA wants to reduce my back...I can't deal with that, and this...and I'm at my breaking point.

On January 23rd my life changed forever. I had sexual assault reporting and prevention training at work a few days earlier, which triggered my memories. They had been blocked. I had always thought what happened was consensual gay sexual activity...at least that's what that predator had told me he would say if I talked. And that he would kill me and hide my body in the woods.

I have been having memories drown me ever since that time....I have 37!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! years of sexual, child sexual assault, physical assault, domestic violence abuse.....how the crap am I even still alive???????

I know I can't talk about anything that didn't happen during my service years. So that limits me to 4 sexual assaults, 2 by females and 2 by same male predator. The last was a drunk female Sailor while I was on deployment. She tackled me then began assaulting me. She was drunk off her butt, and I was automatically the perpatrator...sober male Marine, versus a drunk female Sailor...who do you think is guilty???

I can't comprehend...37 years of garbage history in the last 10 weeks....I    am   utterly        worthless         

[Andyman73]

Found out yesterday 50% ptsd due to MST.  Overall comp rate is now 90%.

[MKAH]

On 01/07/2017 at 11:44 AM, Andyman73 said:

Found out yesterday 50% ptsd due to MST.  Overall comp rate is now 90%.

Great news Andyman, I am so happy for you..  That seems really quick for a claim to completed, if fact...that seems incredible? 

It took the VA about 10 months to deny my PTSD-MST.  The denial statement was full of errors, omissions and looked like a stock form letter that was poorly filled out.  My nod has been simmering for over a year.

Mark

[Andyman73]

Mark,

Thanks man, I'm kind of surprised too at how quick this went. Still ticked off that they lowballed me, though. Really struggling with focusing on the win instead of the loss.

I really really hope you don't have to wait much longer. I don't know how I would have done what you're doing....nearly 2 years into it...you're a much better man than I.  Sure the payoff will be huge...but will that be enough to erase the stress of these long months gone by?

Andy