ptsd Mild Tbi Possible

[out_here04]

For almost a year, I have been rated 100 percent schedular (temporary not permanent/total) for anxiety/depression. My "long-suffering" road to the rating began about 15 years ago on active-duty when I began complaining about bouts of lethargy, lack of concentration, confusion, muddled thinking, difficulty prioritizing, difficulty accomplishing tasks or a general lack of or stunting of what I have come to know as "executive functioning" or some similar term. I began re-reading sentences and paragraphs several times to get the meaning. Writing was and still is a chore, even though I have written well on many occasions, all the while thinking no one but me knows how much effort it takes. I ran across a term also that involves having to explain anything and everything and that seems to match up with the convoluted way I sometimes have to use to express myself. I think the term begins with "con...", too. I apologize for how hard it may make to follow this post.

Besides a self-thwarted suicide plan back when my symptoms bounced up against job performance, with subsequent tracking in the mental health pipeline, and two surgeries for chronic sinusitus and finally being diagnosed for sleep apnea, I STILL seem to have cognitive functioning issues. I have been a multiple-list-maker for years and constantly seek out planning/time management tools, trying them and giving up on them. I am a pretty good writer but doing so is like squeezing water out of turnips. My brain or forehead and scalp muscles (around my forehead, ears and down my neck)seem to tense up and there seems to be a lack of fluidity in doing this. Thinking is like pushing play-dough through one of those shape-makers instead of like water going through a garden hose. Getting anything done is like swimming upstream through molasses. I have virtually no self-motivation, self-discipline, even though I want to do so much. This resulted in me barely making it to military retirement (thank God I did) but I had begun getting into low-level administrative disciplinary actions taken against me intermittently and especially towards the end. I actually was more or less threatened into retirement even though my high year of tenure would have given me another two and a half years on active-duty. I would have continued to serve despite the effort it took. I considered challenging some bogus methods to "railroad" me but was advised not to by a military chaplain and others, plus I was too tired to fight any more. I tried civilian employment but was let go after about three months. I have not worked since which was five years ago. I fear trying again but might try some school work of some sort.

I ran across the term "mild TBI" while googling about my symptoms. My anxiety/depression is service-connected per my rating but I/docs never connected it to an event I believe could have been the root of everything to follow (and I think this was aggravated by resulting high stress levels and by separately by a subsequent PTSD stressor event that I have had validated through a buddy/commander statement with VA).

The reason I think I may have mild TBI is this: During a military exercise overseas much earlier in my career, I fell and hit my head falling out of a top-bunk rack. The floor was tile on concrete type. Laugh, I kind of do. I remember that I woke up some time later having missed or come in extremely late for my shift. It is a bit embarrassing to say this, but the symptoms seem to have originated then and there. No one in my chain noticed as I was working with a foreign national who did not speak English (he did give me some pretty intense scowls)/ I did not report this caring more at the time about staying out of trouble for being "AWOL" or "missing movement" or whatever the UCMJ could have thrown at me, or at least getting wrote up. I had been a "super troop" and supervisors at my home bases thought highly of me. After that, things began to change.

I am going to bring this up to my VAMC primary care and mental health providers at my appointments in the next week or so. I have wanted to get to the bottom of this for a very long time and feel this may be part of it.

After all that, my questions (besides any other thoughts welcomed from my explanation) are:

What types of VA or otherwise therapy/assistance are available for mild-TBI?

Any recommended websites (VA or other) would help me better understand these symptoms and how veterans or others cope with this?

I am not 100 percent certain if I would truly be diagnosed with mild-TBI but from what my gut tells me, I do.

[timetowinarace]

That video was a good find. She does a good job explaining much of it.

I saw allot of doctors in a number of years and maybe two of them believed I was having the problems I explained. The rest simply brushed me aside. When I went to the neuro-psych and got tested, she asked what my goals were(as the lady in the video explained). When I told her I wanted to continue voc-rehab she stiffened right up and suggested I file for SSI. School is not an option.

Anyway, with the testing, I am now believed about my symptoms. Now that I'm service connected for the cognative problems, I guess they can find no reason for me to be lieing about the dizziness, weakness, fatigue, headaches and everything else.

[out_here04]

this coming monday i go to the tbi specialist doc. already had the pre-screen for cognitive, it seems a lot of the tests were done in that one. not sure what to expect next. maybe just a consult to see if further neuro psych tests are necesary, possibly mri or additional technological evalutaion. a little apprehensive. will update after i go.

[Fire Courage]

Great video out_here04! I have had a Neuropsychological evaluation at the VA back in May. I can tell you that it was mentally exhausting! I didn't feel very smart afterwards.

I spoke with the doctor for an hour and the testing was two hours. The psychologist notes stated that "My overall profile is highly consistent with diagnosis of PTSD, anxiety disorder, and dysthymia. I filed a claimed for anxiety disorder last week.

On the neuropsyc test, I tested "average" in a lot of areas along with a few "low averages" and a few "high averages". I tested "mild hopelessness" under mood.

Do I stand a good chance of getting a rating for anxiety?

[Berta]

If you have a stressor you can prove,did you claim PTSD?

I assume but could be wrong that they gave you the MMPI testing?

Whatever disability you claim- you will need a nexus (link) to something in your service period that caused the disability.

They will only rate opne mential disorder although sometimes a vet can have PTSD with depression or anxiety with mood disorder.

They lump it all together for one Mental disability rating.

[Fire Courage]

I need a little help. I don't know if any of these are stressors or if the VA will consider them stressors!

Stressor 1. When I was in the Navy during Operation Desert Storm, I saw dead Iraqi soldiers floating by our ship. One of them was even decapitated. 18 years later I can still visualize those images and it makes me nervous. I don't know how I can prove that I saw this though.

Stressor 2. During the war, the USS Tripoli and the USS Princeton were both struck by mines. Our ship was operating in the same area when those ships were damaged. During that same time, our ship also located and destroyed 3 mines by attaching 10 lbs of C-4 to them. I have the mines being detonated by our ship on tape. We operated out of Mine field 5 for 12 consecutive days. It was terrifying!

Stressor 3. Don't know if my skin disorder can be considered. I'm service connected for it. Its a full body skin rash. I only wear long sleeves and long pants. I no longer go swimming with my family because of how much attention and questions the rash bring. I'm very conscious of it and it bothers me a lot when others notice it. Some people even think I'm contagious.

Could either of these be considered a stressor?

Thanks

[Fire Courage]

Ooops! I thought I had started a new thread! I didn't mean to hijack this one! Sorry! I will post in the general forum