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Problems Tdiu

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This past Aprial Begain to recive help for Problems. A friend directed me to apply for increase and apply for PTSD, He spelled it out and just said turn in the paper work. I did the week he passed away. I was granted a increase from 10% to 20% for lower Back. And 30% for PTSD. This was with issues cause I was not upfront and honest at the C-P thing. I stated this in another post. As funny as it sound I cant seem to find it myself. The Kids say it is here and I should just try harder to find it. I can't.

My mind has come up with plan and seems to be going with it. I have appealed the finding with the DAV and tonight filled out a form for TDIU. Yet I am stuck here in FEAR of turning it in. And or haveing to answer to the DAV dudes with more of his questions. Hell I only leave this house to go to theVA and thats only when I have to or am able to. I have made the commitment to get the help I need. And will do so, but this fear sure slows me down, let alone the past hour just trying to type this.

But here is my question. I repeat myself, and unable to complete the simplest thing if at all. I feel as if I never made it past the 5th grade and I have 2 Asc. Degrees. the Father of 6 and have not been a to good of a DAD and have been married 2 times. The simplest this goes wrong and I panic and freak out. I am mean and have no control as it vents out.

I am not asking for advice to go get help cause I AM. My question is ... Is this what this is all about cause the help I am getting is just making me see WHAT I HAVE BECOME... I am a nut and have issues. But am not sure what to apply for or how to do it. Hell I dont even deal with money cause it has no value to me, but I know it is needed for the Kids. Isn't thier a list of step or a list of thing to say if you are sick do these. Cause I myself have no concept of what to do at what time to do it. And not haveing the ablity to work not the self concept of money has truely almost killed me. Why do thing get so bad so fast. Yet I am to blame cause I am the Problem.

Ok the alarm just went off for the wife. Another night of trying to get information and just more fear of causeing problems. I am asking for opions not GO GET HELP stuff. I am alone in this issue or other feel the same as myself. I cant be the only one who surved and am like this am I. See I dont even Know what I am asking now. This blows.

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Filing a claim and all the ins and outs is mind boggling to everybody and sufferers of PTSD just compound it.

If I did not have spell check I doubt anyone would be able to understand my points I am trying to make. And even with spell check some people have trouble with my sentence structure.I suffer from PTSD and try and stay away from things that get me all frustrated. I believe it is the norm for this disease.

Back to your situation I have the feeling you would be better served by just dumping your claim on the DVA and try and get on with your life. I also will recommend that you go (even though you don't want to hear this) but go and get help. One of the best times to seek help is one you are at what you feel is your worst!

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