LivinginHell

and yes have tan card that never expires..... plus just received mail about cp 35 for my oldest son... yet i dont see anything on ebenes about it

yea i just had emergency sinus surgery due to blockage in which during my C/P exam they just told me i has sinus issues (and rated 0% SC)... i wont push the VA anymore or mess with them (ask for anything) unless i have to....

And I also have military id now (no experation date).... I cant handle going thru the VA again for this. I turned in my paperwork to show I didnt work at all last year

This is what it says for IU rating: Entitlement to IU is granted because claimant is unable to secure or follow a substantially gainful occupation as a result of service-connected disabilities. (38 CFR 3.326 ACE - PME: SSA)... Nothing more. Doesnt state anything else about it. But the funny part is that it shows my monthy award amount effective date and when it will be reduced due to kids turning 18. Also it states about my PTSD will have eval at future date. Also, I applied for 100% reeval for PTSD and it states "Your claim for 100 percent for PTSD is considered mute as you now meet the scheduler 100 percent criteria. You are being paid 100% level because of IU... again no where it states tdiu or pt

Just confused by this whole mess... My VA counsler was talking to me about jobs when IU runs out (guess she thought it was only good for a few years). Started my normal worrying about everything. Looked at my award letter and states granted IU but no mention of PT or Temp. I looked at my letter generator on Ebenes and no commisary letters but PEGGY from 800 number sent me letter to get MIL ID for comm/px. My letter on ebenes says Im no PT because revaluation is set for nov 2018... But I called PEGGY and was sent a letter stating P and T but not for any specific aliment.... See my confusion now... I receive SSI before my IU was granted but im so confused..... Am I P and T (so I can get my son on Champva)????

well see their is an old army saying....that if the army wanted me to be married then they would of issued me a wife. yea, i have been thru 2 in 2 different times in the army. same old story here. 2 kids, 2 different wives. my 1st exwife receives the cs. my 2nd one had to give me my kid at least 50% of the time. and when it comes to free lunches, i tried but since my ex has since remarried (yup, to a guy who made more money then i did while i was in the army) they denied it. i will always make sure my kid as good food no matter what! my creditors stopped calling so i am not worried about them. its the current rent/car insurance/cell phone (which i am required to have with gps always on), electricity, etc... steal from peter to pay paul. as far as the old va claim, i was unaware of any wrong doing. i always sent in my stuff and they always sent me a check for the 80% no matter what. i called once a year and spoke with peggy to make sure i was doing right (they always told me that if they didnt send anything, dont worry about it)...and my biggest thing is that if i did wrong, why was I never charged with a crime (i asked the VA director in Washington State and he agreed with me that i did nothing wrong and it was a mistake on their part but i have to repay the money no matter what)! I got the 70% rating for ptsd and this whole VA thing has made it 10 x worse! i get to be alone for another holiday and since i am "too scary" to work, then i just feel useless and hate asking for help most of the time because i know that i am just a number! but hey, i got the hardest part done so at least i dont have to worry about the va for the next 5 years or so. still, i would rather be working and be happy and not living with the crap in my head. it sucks and sometimes i wish that they had left me in afghanistan where i could of died like a man, not wither away living in this hell!

i went into the va last week to get help. i went to the la jolla ptsd clinic as i was not in the righ frame of mind. i was told that i needed to wait for a doc to see me. i waited 2 hours sitting there, in the corner with my shades on and my hoodie on. after 2 hours (and a half of a pack of cigs later), i went back to the counter to see what was going on. i was told that they had forgot about me and the doc left for lunch. i told them then maybe i should go play in traffic.... they just looked at me weird and said, well sir do what you have to do. just make sure to do it somewhere else. i threw my pen at the wall and left. Also, in 2003 i was getting a check for 30% but they accidently put it it for 80%. i went 2 1/2 years like that befor ethey caught the mistake. i was informed that the overpayment was my fault and i needed to pay it back but still i received checks for the 30% pay rate until 2008 Dec when i went back into the army (because they had been trying to get me back in for 2 years). anyways, i always submitted my forms when i worked, my tax returns, etc but they kept saying that i never sent it in. when i was notified of the hearing i had requested a year prior (it was in 2009) when i was in Guantanmo Bay, Cuba. I called them to tell them i couldnt make it due to military service but asked for a phone hearing. I was told no. They took $89 a month for 4 years of military service. When I left, i tried to have a congressman look into it but was told that they never received my paperwork to fight it so the matter was closed. (2004-2008 was the worst years for the VA as they were busted for shredding paperwork or throwing it away). So, i doubt i will receive any backpay as its now Dec 14th and its been 10 days since I got my decision. I have felt so useless to my kids because i have to nickel and dime everything (thank you 99 cent store) and when it comes to xmas, my charlie brown tree is pretty much all i have. I had to sell plasma/blood to get gas money an dlunch money for my kids. My "social worker" and the WWP all know that i have tried to get a job but was arrested at a job interview and have been told that I scare people because of my scars that are visable (i have one on my forehead from a botched cist removal and my leg scars from the knee surigries i have had. I am just at my wits end because the stars are not lining up for me, my ex-wife has been taking the kids more and more away from me because she know how broke i am and even asking for help sucks because i am just a number to most people. I tried to get a holiday job but was told that i was too much ovequalified for the job and then was told that i would scare customers away. i just cant seem to get a break anymore.... i was honorable discharged from the army but invol sep. no medical or anything like that. they rated at 70% for ptsd was because my commander had noted the only reason why he didnt want me to re-enlist was because he was afraid that i would start killing him or my sargents (though i was a great soldier and he would love to have me with him if my mind was right). I just cant get a break anymore and now, my blackouts have restricted me from going to most places. i have wondered many times how i would go out (ie "accidently hitting a semi at 80) and when i told the VA that, they said that unless i say im going to do it then everyone has the same thoughts. I dont go out almost at all anymore....I am just scared that if i dont get any money coming in to cover my bills (i was a 1st time go for SSD in under 3 months as the doc was scared of me as well) but they take 50% for Child Support and the WWP person who is "helping me" with my claim has been busy with others so he cant get to my TDUI claim to help me. I have done this process myself for both VA and SSD. Im just tired of living like this.....

i have contacted wwp...they know my status. they have been ok but i am just one of thousands of wounded warriors who need help. i live in socal so everything is expensive. but cant get welfare because they said that i make too much money (they count the va even though i wont be receiving anything)... its ok i guess. again, im just a ptsd guy who is like many others. but hey, i got 80%. better than i what i thought. just not gonna celebrate it... wish i could give it to someone else who could use it.....

and it was a 70% rating for ptsd and 10/10/10% for other things which equals 80%. im just so confused and worried that my kids have to suffer along with me.

i last worked when i left the army. 27 Feb 2013. They stated it was to gather evidence which does not make since. Also, can they take all of the payments? back in 2003, they paid me wrong and continued to do so. I had no idea until i got the nice big letter from them so I contacted my congressman who told me that they gave me the option to appeal (which they never did). It just amazing that when they screw up it takes years to fix....But if we screw up they take action right then and there. I had to rejoin the military to make ends meet in 2008... anyways, i guess it does not matter anymore. it may be a win but the tdui is going to take a year or so (according to post on here) and though they know i have played russian roulette many times, i guess that they would prefer more homeless vets (or wait til we die). I have two of my close battle buddies take their lives because of the stuff we went thru....i guess i am just a number. i got my letter on wed and still no payment. xmas time is the worst holiday ever. i had to steal a small tree to make my kids think its ok. i had to pawn my car to buy xmas presents and food. WWP/VA knows whats going on but all i am told is get in line. Man, i guess i will never catch a break unless its my neck!

well, got the va letter today. total rating of 80%. but they screwed up my dependants info and now i have to start all over for them. they deferred my tdui claim (what does this mean?) but i got the hard part out of the way. i dont think i will receive any money because many years ago they overpayed me so i will still be almost homeless and broke but hey a win is a win!

well i was reviewing my status on ebenes and it said the only thing they received was my va medical history...nothing else. i have a sudden fear of being told i wont get the rating...which scares me because i have never wanted this nor would want this on anyone. i have a fear of being homeless since i have nothing left, getting a job is the toughest thing to do for a 37 yr old vet who hasn't worked since i left the army (and no one is hiring us), fighting/getting upset quickly, no sleep, hell i dont even leave my house unless i have to get food or my kids....bills are piling up and tires are bald. i dont see the light at the end of the tunnel and now it seems that i wont make rent for next month...i hate the holidays.....i just cant stand living with this crap and with my luck, the VA is going to deny everything for me...just lost in the sauce with nowhere to go and been thru the VA OEF counslers (but i cant keep going due to no money for gas) and thru WWP (heard nothing from them)... they closed my needing paperwork on nov 14th.... am i really screwed?

Ok, here is my post as I am lost in the sauce and life is getting more bleak with the holidays coming up. I applied for SSD while waiting for C/P Exam for PTSD. SSD apporved for PTSD 100%. I saw C/P examiner and this is the report: SECTION I: ---------- 1. Diagnostic Summary --------------------- Does the Veteran have a diagnosis of PTSD that conforms to DSM-IV criteria based on today's evaluation? [X] Yes [ ] No ICD code: 309.81 2. Current Diagnoses -------------------- a. Diagnosis #1: PTSD ICD code: 309.81 Indicate the Axis category: [X] Axis I [ ] Axis II Comments, if any: moderate to moderately severe sx, present for at least 2 yrs (he's a bit unclear), daily sx, no remissions. He has some depressive sx but doesn't meet criteria at this point for an affective disorder. b. Axis III - medical diagnoses (to include TBI): orthopedic injuries ICD code: V54 Comments, if any: no major medical problems, no TBI reported. c. Axis IV - Psychosocial and Environmental Problems (describe, if any): intermittent homelessness, unemployed, serious financial difficulties. d. Axis V - Current global assessment of functioning (GAF) score: 50 3. Differentiation of symptoms ------------------------------ a. Does the Veteran have more than one mental disorder diagnosed? [ ] Yes [X] No 4. Occupational and social impairment ------------------------------------- a. Which of the following best summarizes the Veteran's level of occupational and social impairment with regards to all mental diagnoses? (Check only one) Page 24 of 86 [X] Occupational and social impairment with deficiencies in most areas, such as work, school, family relations, judgment, thinking and/or mood b. For the indicated level of occupational and social impairment, is it possible to differentiate what portion of the occupational and social impairment indicated above is caused by each mental disorder? [ ] Yes [ ] No [X] No other mental disorder has been diagnosed c. If a diagnosis of TBI exists, is it possible to differentiate what portion of the occupational and social impairment indicated above is caused by the TBI? [ ] Yes [ ] No [X] No diagnosis of TBI 4. PTSD Diagnostic Criteria --------------------------- a. Please check criteria used for establishing the current PTSD diagnosis. The diagnostic criteria for PTSD, referred to as Criteria A-F, are from the Diagnostic and Statistical Manual of Mental Disorders, 4th edition (DSM-IV). Criterion A: The Veteran has been exposed to a traumatic event where both of the following were present: [X] The Veteran experienced, witnessed or was confronted with an event that involved actual or threatened death or serious injury, or a threat to the physical integrity of self or others. [X] The Veteran's response involved intense fear, helplessness or horror. Criterion B: The traumatic event is persistently reexperienced in 1 or more of the following ways: [X] Recurrent and distressing recollections of the event, including images, thoughts or perceptions [X] Recurrent distressing dreams of the event Page 27 of 86 [X] Acting or feeling as if the traumatic event were recurring; this includes a sense of reliving the experience, illusions, hallucinations and dissociative flashback episodes, including those that occur on awakening or when intoxicated [X] Intense psychological distress at exposure to internal or external cues that symbolize or resemble an aspect of the traumatic event [X] Physiological reactivity on exposure to internal or external cues that symbolize or resemble an aspect of the traumatic event Criterion C: Persistent avoidance of stimuli associated with the trauma and numbing of general responsiveness (not present before the trauma), as indicated by 3 or more of the following: [X] Efforts to avoid thoughts, feelings or conversations associated with the trauma [X] Efforts to avoid activities, places or people that arouse recollections of the trauma [X] Markedly diminished interest or participation in significant activities [X] Feeling of detachment or estrangement from others [X] Restricted range of affect (e.g., unable to have loving feelings) Criterion D: Persistent symptoms of increased arousal, not present before the trauma, as indicated by 2 or more of the following: [X] Difficulty falling or staying asleep [X] Irritability or outbursts of anger [X] Difficulty concentrating [X] Hypervigilance [X] Exaggerated startle response Criterion E: [X] The duration of the symptoms described above in Criteria B, C and D is more than 1 month. Criterion F: [X] The PTSD symptoms described above cause clinically significant distress or impairment in social, occupational, or other important areas of functioning. b. Which stressor(s) contributed to the Veterans PTSD diagnosis?: [X] Stressor #1 [X] Stressor #2 5. Symptoms ----------- For VA rating purposes, check all symptoms that apply to the Veterans diagnoses: [X] Anxiety [X] Suspiciousness Page 28 of 86 [X] Chronic sleep impairment [X] Disturbances of motivation and mood [X] Difficulty in establishing and maintaining effective work and social relationships [X] Difficulty in adapting to stressful circumstances, including work or a worklike setting 6. Other symptoms ----------------- Does the Veteran have any other symptoms attributable to PTSD (and other mental disorders) that are not listed above? [X] Yes [ ] No If yes, describe: he has trouble being in crowded places, he seems quite discouraged. 7. Competency ------------- Is the Veteran capable of managing his or her financial affairs? [X] Yes [ ] No 8. Remarks, if any ------------------ with regards to routine activities of daily living he stays at home most of the time but he's able to drive (but trouble affording gas), he can shop but has to go during off hours when there are no crowds, he has no recreational activities, he is capable of routine self-care. Veteran is seeking service connection for: 7) attention deficit disorder-- no present, his problem is PTSD 8) PTSD-- related to traumatic/life threatening experiences as a prison guard at Guantanamo and Afghanistan: attacked by prisoners, life threatened, riots. He also experienced indirect combat in Afghanistan GAF 50.....I am having trouble trying to live everyday and if not for my kids, would more than likely not be here. The VA is doing what it can as I know it takes years but I have no more money, hate asking for handouts and my claim went to pending a desicion last month (claim filed in JAN 13)....Any ideas on how long and what can I expect for a rating....Need to see if i should start packing after Xmas since I have nothing left to sell and refuse to steal......