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bassrunnin

Second Class Petty Officers
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Everything posted by bassrunnin

  1. I have been reading on this forum and am really nervous about the C&P exam that I have coming up this Thursday. It seems there are so many horror stories. I was triggered with PTSD summer of 2013 and had to call VA crisis line Nov 2013 when I was thinking of killing myself because I was becoming so unraveled and didn't understand why...hadn't been in the service since 1996 and didn't even know that MST existed...it wasn't until i talked to the crisis DR follow up the next day that he said it sounded like I had PTSD. I thought PtSD was just for people who saw war. I was out of on short term disability at work in Nov 2013, Dec 2013, March 2014, and haven't been able to work since June 2014. Since June 2014 I have been hospitalized 3 times for PTSD and Bipolar. The first hospitalization was at a VA facility and I was there only for the PTSD-MST. It wasn't until then that I found out that I could even get compensation for what happened to me in the military where I was gang raped. It took me until the end of Aug before I could even write a statement to file my claim. I have been suicidal since then a handful of times, disassociate, blah, blah, blah. I use to work full time, working on a Grad degree, second bachelors, and have two kids. I couldn't even keep my kids at home over christmas break and had to pay for daycare because I can't handle having them at home even though I dont' work. I even applied for the VA CWT program where they help you find a job and have a disability. They dropped me from the program saying I was "occupational maladjustment disorder". I'm concerned about the whole proof thing like many others who have posted here. I'm also afraid that they will think I am exagerating my symptoms, although my VA counselor has stated that I can't do CBT for the MST until I have sufficient coping skills which right now I do not. OK...proof...when the rape happened I was on shore duty and the perps where stationed on a submarine. When word got out they started an investigation on the submarine but nothing ever came from it. Shortly after I was asked to move off base and couple months later had to get tested for STD and turned out they left me with a parting gift. Is this enough? What I went through was so traumatic I don't know if I can take someone telling me it didn't happen. Second question. My VSO said that my statement should be enough since they should be able to pull records to cooberate my story. They have my VA hospitalization and treatment records since Nov 2013. Should I upload my hospital documents from the other two hospitalizations? My VSO thinks it will delay my claim and understands what a financial strain I am under now with not being able to work. What do you think? What can I expect? We are falling so far behind bills, I'm pulling my hair because I have gone from a someone to a nobody in a matter of a year. Anyhow any advice would help....thanks
  2. bassrunnin

    Employment Form

    I know on here it has been said that you should turn in a form even if one has not been sent to you. I've filled out one but don't remember ever getting one again. Is the anniversary date the one when you originally filed or the date you got the award. For example I filed in Aug 2014 but was awarded in March 2015? And if I don't get the form what is it called and how do I get one to send in myself? Sorry I am talking about talking about the employment money earned form. Hopefully you know what I'm talking about.
  3. bassrunnin

    Employment Form

    Thank you very much for the link. How do I know what the station address is? I live in TN if that matters
  4. bassrunnin

    PTSD TDUI now what?

    It's been awhile since I'be been on this site but I need some guidance and knew this was the place to get it. HADIT helped me so much with helping me to win my claim. I am 100% for MST and was also in the Navy and female. I received TDUI due to my symptoms and I don't know how to handle it. At first I was elated, now it's been awhile and I have guilt about getting 100% when so many people are fighting the system. I guess it's winner's guilt? But here's my real problem with all of this. Because I'm 100% I have Disabled Vet plates and I don't work. People ask what do I do and some closer friends know that I am on disability and some are ex military. I served in Hawaii and was in the Navy and was a female. How do you handle telling friends and relatives that your a disabled vet under my circumstances? They probably think I'm scamming the system because I don't have an answer for them. How can somebody who was on shore duty, a yeoman, in the Navy and a female possibly be 100% disabled. It would be so much easier if it was a back injury or something like that. I guess I'm ashamed of getting disability for PTSD and if I told them it was for PTSD there's no way that they would understand. And the ex military people would probably figure out it was MST and that is my worst fear. How can I tell people why I'm disabled? I feel like I should hide the fact that I'm disabled because I know they are thinking "how could I get TDUI". I'm just really at a lost about all of this and would like any advice you can give me. It's been bothering me for awhile and it's getting to the point where I have to tell my close friends and family something. I can't avoid it much longer. How have others handled telling people close you have PTSD? It's one thing if I would have served overseas then there wouldn't be an issue, people would be more likely to understand, or at least it would make sense to them. Anyhow I am starting to ramble...any advice would help...thanks.
  5. bassrunnin

    PTSD TDUI now what?

    I am overwhelmed by all the responses I have gotten and I want to say thanks for ideas but more importantly sharing your stories. It is good to know your not alone. I think this MST section is a great place to share. I haven't found anywhere else to do that. I looked at vetwow.com and it seems no one is running that site anymore but it does have good info on claims. But back to my original issue. It it is hard enough to find yourself a disabled vet. But even worse is their are so many with PTSD that no one will ever understand. And so many more that don't know about rape in the military let alone knowing what MST stands for. So many people waiting for their compensation and so many who have gotten it but other than financial stability we have so much more that we still carry that no amount of money could pay for. And then there's the outside world waiting for the chance to question your disability. How do you explain to the outside world that you have PTSD without feeling judged. Bottom line is we shouldn't have to feel that way. Why do we have to feel so ashamed of having MST. It's like another assault on our character. But that is the world we live in and I don't see it changing anytime soon. So what shall I do? A little bit of everything that you have said. 1. Don't feel ashamed. I am a vet 2. Don't advertise. For the security of myself and sanity 3. To help others on this site who have been down this road as so many have done for me these last couple of days 4. To tell my daughters parents that I'm disabled but don't want to talk about or don't like to talk about it. which do you think is better? Don't want to talk about it? Or don't like to talk about it? thanks
  6. bassrunnin

    Employment Form

    You are awesome! Thank you!
  7. bassrunnin

    Employment Form

    I am currently TDUI and have not received a form to fill out. I guess it's the 21-4140 Employment Questionnaire. Is it necessary to fill out...this is my first year. Also where do I mail it to. If it helps I live in TN... Sorry computer was lagging and hit submit again so this is a duplicate. I am really really sorry
  8. bassrunnin

    TDIU P&T and Dental Care

    How do I find out more about this? Do I contact my local VA medical facility?
  9. bassrunnin

    TDIU P&T and Dental Care

    What kind of dental do they cover? I have two missing front teeth
  10. bassrunnin

    Employment Form

    How do I get the address of the Designated Claims Intake Center?
  11. bassrunnin

    Employment Form

    I am currently TDUI and have not received a form to fill out. I guess it's the 21-4140 Employment Questionnaire. Is it necessary to fill out...this is my first year. Also where do I mail it to. If it helps I live in TN... Sorry computer was lagging and hit submit again so this is a duplicate. I am really really sorry
  12. bassrunnin

    Employment Form

    I am currently TDUI and have not received a form to fill out. I guess it's the 21-4140 Employment Questionnaire. Is it necessary to fill out...this is my first year. Also where do I mail it to. If it helps I live in TN... Sorry computer was lagging and hit submit again so this is a duplicate. I am really really sorry
  13. bassrunnin

    PTSD TDUI now what?

    I wanted to say that you're advice has been really good and I appreciate everyone who responded. My biggest thing is all of you are USMC, Army...people can believe that something traumatic happened and leave it that. But how does a woman in the Navy on shore duty in Hawaii explain that I have had a traumatic experience? I guess that is my biggest fear...I don't want people to find me out. Or start assuming that "the only reason she could have ptsd is by being assaulted...does that make any sense to anyone? I guess it's like what DarkAngel said " I quickly learned that all I have to say, IF ANYTHING, is, "I am disabled because of something traumatic, and i don't like to talk about it". " I guess my real issue is my daughters best friend's parents were in the Navy...so they know what the Navy is like where I was at and to make matters worse I was a Yeoman (radar in mash). Should I tell them the truth and hope for the best?
  14. It's been awhile since I'be been on this site but I need some guidance and knew this was the place to get it. HADIT helped me so much with helping me to win my claim. I am 100% for MST and was also in the Navy and female. I received TDUI due to my symptoms and I don't know how to handle it. At first I was elated, now it's been awhile and I have guilt about getting 100% when so many people are fighting the system. I guess it's winner's guilt? But here's my real problem with all of this. Because I'm 100% I have Disabled Vet plates and I don't work. People ask what do I do and some closer friends know that I am on disability and some are ex military. I served in Hawaii and was in the Navy and was a female. How do you handle telling friends and relatives that your a disabled vet under my circumstances? They probably think I'm scamming the system because I don't have an answer for them. How can somebody who was on shore duty, a yeoman, in the Navy and a female possibly be 100% disabled. It would be so much easier if it was a back injury or something like that. I guess I'm ashamed of getting disability for PTSD and if I told them it was for PTSD there's no way that they would understand. And the ex military people would probably figure out it was MST and that is my worst fear. How can I tell people why I'm disabled? I feel like I should hide the fact that I'm disabled because I know they are thinking "how could I get TDUI". I'm just really at a lost about all of this and would like any advice you can give me. It's been bothering me for awhile and it's getting to the point where I have to tell my close friends and family something. I can't avoid it much longer. How have others handled telling people close you have PTSD? It's one thing if I would have served overseas then there wouldn't be an issue, people would be more likely to understand, or at least it would make sense to them. Anyhow I am starting to ramble...any advice would help...thanks.
  15. I too have Bipolar and PTSD. They considered my Bipolar secondary to the PTSD. To answer your question they take both of them into account and how they affect your daily living. My initial rating was 70% PTSD. I applied for TDUI and I believe they took the fact that I am Bipolar 1 with rapid cycling into account along with the PTSD. It's hard enough to maintain a job with PTSD let alone cycling every 6-8 weeks :(
  16. I am currently TDUI and have not received a form to fill out. I guess it's the 21-4140 Employment Questionnaire. Is it necessary to fill out...this is my first year. Also where do I mail it to. If it helps I live in TN...
  17. bassrunnin

    SUCCESS! 100% PTSD/MST

    Hadn't been on the site in awhile so just getting to this post a little late...but did want to repeat something that ATCJen said that can be very very helpful and I felt was crucial to winning my claim. And that is to have a letter ready for the C&P exam that you work with your therapist on. I believe it went along way in my case as I couldn't talk about my incident without disassociating. She wrote a letter stating as such and asked the examiner to keep questions simple as to not trigger me. And then so I didn't have to tell my story out loud I wrote it down for the examiner to read. Hope that helps as well...
  18. It's been awhile since I'be been on this site and I just saw your post where you received 100% and wanted to say congratulations. I too am 100% for MST and was also in the Navy. I know it's been a little while since you got the 100% and wanted to see how you were doing with it. What I mean is that it's good that we got 100% cuz we deserve it because of our symptoms and what had happened. But it is hard for me to say that I am a disabled vet because 1. I feel bad for all those who didn't get processed and win claims so I guess I have some sort of "winner guilt" which it isn't about being a winner, but rather winning in the VA system. and 2. When I tell people that I was in the NAVY they don't see how as a female I could be 100% disabled. Do you have these thoughts? Or is it just me? Never knew someone else that got 100% so I am asking you, because your the first person I've been able to talk about it to. Anyhow, congratulations again and sorry if I am asking to personal of questions...

  19. bassrunnin

    dsm -v

    As far as I know, having the diagnosis is what gets the C&P approved and called for. If they didn't think you had a reason for a claim they wouldn't schedule a C&P exam. They will ask once again ask all the questions in the exam that a DR would ask to see if you meet the criteria for PTSD...same questions the therapist asked you and then they will get into more specifics to figure out where they should rank you for your disability percentage if they approve your claim.
  20. I had a good c&p exam where they said more likely than not ...PTSD was service connected and said that that it affected most of my work, social, etc which would put me in the 70% range. Here's my question... I did not mention any abuse has a child during the c&p exam, it was never mentioned and I wasn't going to offer that info. But in a couple of therapy sessions when they go over history I did mention abuse has a child. Will this now ruin my chances and I will be denied. any opinion would be welcomed. I am at the preparation for decision phase and I am going nuts over this, I was so hopeful about my claim until I read about the cumulative trauma clause that RO can use against us. I don't know if I can handle the fact that because I was abused as a child, that I can't be acknowledged as to what happened to me. That's like a double whammy. It's revictimization twice or rather 3 times if denied. Any advice or opinions would be appreciated. I am a nervous wreck now and so anxious about the results. Actually, its more fear about being denied.
  21. I hadn't updated this post, but wanted to after I had reread this...The VA did end up giving me 70%, so they must have not known or thought about my previous abuse history...hope this is still helpful to remind us to not be too paranoid...but it is understandable to be worried about these things...
  22. OK so I finally got an answer on the TDUI Today I got the actual letter from the VA about my TDIU award. My combined rating is still 70%, but they'll be paying me at 100% with no examinations scheduled in the future. Does this mean I get the benefits of 100% total and am permanent and can ask for property tax exemption and the such? I don't want to ask or presume anything that I shouldn't get or are entitled to. Is it because no examinations are scheduled that I am Permament and Total even though my service connected is 70%. Very confusing. Can someone explain all this to me...please...thanks This is what My VA letter says in Ebennies:VA Benefit Information You have one or more service-connected disabilities: Yes Your combined service-connected evaluation is: 70% Your current monthly award amount is: $3268.12 The effective date of the last change to your current award was: December 01, 2014 You are being paid at the 100 percent rate because you are unemployable due to your service-connected disabilities: Yes You are considered to be totally and permanently disabled due to your service-connected disabilities: Yes
  23. bassrunnin

    Just Awarded 70%...

    I was just awarded 70% and the BBE states the TDIU was pending. Ebenefits shows gathering evidence...how long does it usually take for them to process? I should also mention that I filed the TDIU form with my claim so that part has already done...
  24. bassrunnin

    Woot Woot

    Finally my claim is complete. Took 8 months total, which isn't long compared to a lot of folks on here. 6 months for claim another 2 months to grant TDUI...I'm glad this is finally over so I can start enjoying my life and not checking Ebennies every hour :)
  25. Thanks BUCK52...that was of tremendous help...
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