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I have been reading on this forum and am really nervous about the C&P exam that I have coming up this Thursday. It seems there are so many horror stories. I was triggered with PTSD summer of 2013 and had to call VA crisis line Nov 2013 when I was thinking of killing myself because I was becoming so unraveled and didn't understand why...hadn't been in the service since 1996 and didn't even know that MST existed...it wasn't until i talked to the crisis DR follow up the next day that he said it sounded like I had PTSD. I thought PtSD was just for people who saw war. I was out of on short term disability at work in Nov 2013, Dec 2013, March 2014, and haven't been able to work since June 2014. Since June 2014 I have been hospitalized 3 times for PTSD and Bipolar. The first hospitalization was at a VA facility and I was there only for the PTSD-MST. It wasn't until then that I found out that I could even get compensation for what happened to me in the military where I was gang raped. It took me until the end of Aug before I could even write a statement to file my claim. I have been suicidal since then a handful of times, disassociate, blah, blah, blah. I use to work full time, working on a Grad degree, second bachelors, and have two kids. I couldn't even keep my kids at home over christmas break and had to pay for daycare because I can't handle having them at home even though I dont' work. I even applied for the VA CWT program where they help you find a job and have a disability. They dropped me from the program saying I was "occupational maladjustment disorder". I'm concerned about the whole proof thing like many others who have posted here. I'm also afraid that they will think I am exagerating my symptoms, although my VA counselor has stated that I can't do CBT for the MST until I have sufficient coping skills which right now I do not. OK...proof...when the rape happened I was on shore duty and the perps where stationed on a submarine. When word got out they started an investigation on the submarine but nothing ever came from it. Shortly after I was asked to move off base and couple months later had to get tested for STD and turned out they left me with a parting gift. Is this enough? What I went through was so traumatic I don't know if I can take someone telling me it didn't happen. Second question. My VSO said that my statement should be enough since they should be able to pull records to cooberate my story. They have my VA hospitalization and treatment records since Nov 2013. Should I upload my hospital documents from the other two hospitalizations? My VSO thinks it will delay my claim and understands what a financial strain I am under now with not being able to work. What do you think? What can I expect? We are falling so far behind bills, I'm pulling my hair because I have gone from a someone to a nobody in a matter of a year. Anyhow any advice would help....thanks

so my claim was submitted on 12/12/2016. I submitted for bipolar/depression (reopen) and tinnitus (new). I sent it in as an FDC with all my evidence. I checked ebenefits on 12/21/2016 and the status is already showing preparation for decision. Is this normal? I haven't even gone to a c&p exam, I haven't recieved any correspondences or anything. For the bipolar depression it is a reopen because when i first filed in 2011, I missed my appointment. After I missed my appointment, the VA sent me papers (back in 2011) saying that they see that i was treated for depression during active duty. but since i failed to show up to the appointment, it was denied. So now i've sent a ton of new evidence that supports my claim and they've reopened the case. But does the speed with which this is progressing means that i am being denied? As noted below, ebennies is showing that the va rep has already made a decision, in less than two weeks. With no exams or anything... What does this mean... Is this normal? have i been denied? Is there a phone number i can call?? im freaking out. Here's what ebenefits show: Estimated Completion: 01/24/2017 - 03/04/2017 STATUS: Preparation For Decision The Veterans Service Representative has recommended a decision, and is preparing required documents detailing that decision. If more evidence is required, the claim will be sent back in the process for more information or evidence

I have asked a lot of questions and i continue to ask alot of questions to learn even more. I think this may be my final question before i file. So i am currently service connected at 80% 60% asthma 30% allergic rhinitus 10% carpal tunnel 10% cystic acne (due to jet fumes) Now here's my question. Back in 2009 i began seeing a shrink for depression. ive been on pills and have gone to a counselor very often ever since. It is believed that my depression came from the 3 plane crashes that i witnessed. And another 1 that i didnt witness, but i was apart of the HR (human remains) team that shipped the 6 recovered bodies home. It is also believed that my depression has come as a result of the severe asthma and allergy pains. Recent my therapist marked me down as bipolar I, fyi. My question is, do you think i would have a better chance claiming bipolar/depression as secondary to the asthma and allergies. Or should i just say that ive been depressed from the plane crashes and hr missions. Or should i just claim depression as its own issue. please help. Thanks.

Update - granted 100% for PTSD!

Hey Vets. Monthly troll here. Currently 0% Service Connected for ADHD. My 2nd go-round I got a bit smarter and claimed MDD, Tinnitus, I/U, ADD with bipolar disorder (2ndary), and Anxiety Disorder. Claim submitted May 15 2016. Just did C&P on July 23 2016. The following is going to be info from my VA records, and I'm scared I did it wrong again - currently in a homeless vet program and sick of being broke/retarded at life. As of today: Active Problems: Cannabis dependence in remission (SCT 191839003) Schizoaffective disorder, bipolar type (SCT 38368003) Legal problem (SCT 22268004) Adult attention deficit hyperactivity disorder (SCT 444613000) Recurrent major depression (SCT 66344007) Homeless single person (SCT 160700001) Active Medications: ---- SERTRALINE HCL 100MG TAB - (ACTIVE) FLUTICASONE PROP 50MCG 120D NASAL INHL - (ACTIVE) QUETIAPINE FUMARATE 50MG TAB - (ACTIVE) AMOXICILLIN 500MG CAP - (ACTIVE) SODIUM FLUORIDE 1.1% (FL 0.5%) DENT GEL - (ACTIVE/SUSP) Old Meds -- Dextroamphetamine for ADHD Clonidine(Blood Pressure) Trazadone(Sleep) METHYLPHENIDATE (ADD) CITALOPRAM HYDROBROMIDE HYDROMORPHONE 2MG/ML INJ 1M : DIATRIZOATE MEGL ALBUTEROL 90MCG 2007-TRAZODONE (depression/mood/sleep) 2007-MIRTAZAPINE 2007: Last year of active duty service. No combat tours. Assigned to a recruiting station, a decade younger than every other Marine in my office. Was often critized for mistakes in job performance. Sometimes I would take breaks and cry in my car because I was so unhappy with that present situation. Sept 2007: Talk to a psych once 2 months before discharge about my emotional issues and depressed state. No diagnosis. Sept 2008: Diagnosed with Depression. Was taking a med called Citalopram or something. 5 days later had a suicide attempt and was in the VA ward for 3 days. Was officially diagnosed with MDD less than 1 month after I left service. Now: Went for my C&P for Tinnitus. She said I had high frequency hearing loss. They didnt provide me hearing protection (ran out) during grenade throwing which was initial issue. It effects my sleeping and sometimes have to have people repeat things. C&P for MDD: Explained what I have above about my final duty station, my suicide attempt. Also added: 10 years of not being able to hold a job, quit/get fired for stupid reasons, dont show up cause I dont feel right. I lay in bed for weeks at a time not feeling like doing anything. I DO take care of my appearance. Feel hopeless and useless to society Cannot make functional relationships with others. Distrust others automatically. Avoid others at all costs. Hear voices saying 'its ok to die, the world doesnt need you,'. Will continue updated once I re-log on this library computer. What do you guys think/predict/belief?

I am wondering if I should filed for an increase for my MH issues, currently rated 30% for bipolar with panic/anxiety, also rated for other things giving me TDIU. My psychiatrist has brought up my agoraphobia a few times but I am beginning to realize it isn't getting any better and I wonder if I should apply for an increase as well as housebound. Does anyone have experience with this, advice? I know my MH rating is much lower than it should be honestly, I am fairly certain with my VA records that 70% would be a definite and possibly 100%.

I am awaiting the VLJ decision for SC bi-polar disorder. While waiting, I looked up my current disability rating on ebenefits, and it said I was 70% NSC for bipolar. Does this mean that when I'm rated SC, I will be rated 70%? Thanking you in advance. TXMarine

Hello all, new here. Have questions. I've already opened a new claim and am awaiting my exam, so I think I have to wait to open a new claim after this one closes for an increase in rating for bipolar adjustment disorder w/ anxiety and depressed mood (also claimed as sleep disorder) which I'm service connected disabled with rating of 30%. This was given after I was honorably discharged in 2007 when enlistment was up after 4 years. My mental health has gotten so much worse. I'm seeing a marriage counselor, private therapist, va psych and my insurance psych (all have release of info to talk to eachother). Anyway I have not worked since 2012, my va dr wrote a letter stating she didn't think I could work due to panic attacks and such. enlisted weight at age of 20 and no kids was 135 Same when I got out with one child NOW after 3 kids (youngest will be 2 next month) 104lbs. I don't eat, I get hardly sleep, anxious, panic attacks, no longer talk to friends and rarely see family outside of my home. I was also diagnosed ADHD jan 2014 3 months after my 8 year old was when I realized I had all the symptoms they told us in his two week evaluation of ADHD. VA Dr aware. Also before I enlisted I had to tell the military about my prior sexual abuse as a child by my father. I had no symptoms of anxiety and such prior to military. However, I got married a year in and found out my husband cheated on me and was coming back and forth between us and I was devastated and couldn't handle the emotional roller coaster and the feelings of the guilt and shame associated after I'd have sex with him and he'd leave to go see her. I was admitted into a mental facility for 4-5 days and that's when the above diagnosis was made. But I'm thinking that I could suffer from PTSD because of my childhood and when my ex cheated and used me for sex and then left me, it brought many flashbacks and memories of my childhood and I'm not sure if I can link a claim for PTSD to the mental health comp listed above. Like I said military was aware of sexual abuse prior to service and yes I turned my dad in and he went to jail and have never seen him again. please help?

I have been reading on this forum and am really nervous about the C&P exam that I have coming up this Thursday. It seems there are so many horror stories. I was triggered with PTSD summer of 2013 and had to call VA crisis line Nov 2013 when I was thinking of killing myself because I was becoming so unraveled and didn't understand why...hadn't been in the service since 1996 and didn't even know that MST existed...it wasn't until i talked to the crisis DR follow up the next day that he said it sounded like I had PTSD. I thought PtSD was just for people who saw war. I was out of on short term disability at work in Nov 2013, Dec 2013, March 2014, and haven't been able to work since June 2014. Since June 2014 I have been hospitalized 3 times for PTSD and Bipolar. The first hospitalization was at a VA facility and I was there only for the PTSD-MST. It wasn't until then that I found out that I could even get compensation for what happened to me in the military where I was gang raped. It took me until the end of Aug before I could even write a statement to file my claim. I have been suicidal since then a handful of times, disassociate, blah, blah, blah. I use to work full time, working on a Grad degree, second bachelors, and have two kids. I couldn't even keep my kids at home over christmas break and had to pay for daycare because I can't handle having them at home even though I dont' work. I even applied for the VA CWT program where they help you find a job and have a disability. They dropped me from the program saying I was "occupational maladjustment disorder". I'm concerned about the whole proof thing like many others who have posted here. I'm also afraid that they will think I am exagerating my symptoms, although my VA counselor has stated that I can't do CBT for the MST until I have sufficient coping skills which right now I do not. OK...proof...when the rape happened I was on shore duty and the perps where stationed on a submarine. When word got out they started an investigation on the submarine but nothing ever came from it. Shortly after I was asked to move off base and couple months later had to get tested for STD and turned out they left me with a parting gift. Is this enough? What I went through was so traumatic I don't know if I can take someone telling me it didn't happen. Second question. My VSO said that my statement should be enough since they should be able to pull records to cooberate my story. They have my VA hospitalization and treatment records since Nov 2013. Should I upload my hospital documents from the other two hospitalizations? My VSO thinks it will delay my claim and understands what a financial strain I am under now with not being able to work. What do you think? What can I expect? We are falling so far behind bills, I'm pulling my hair because I have gone from a someone to a nobody in a matter of a year. Anyhow any advice would help....thanks

I have PTSD and diagnosed as bi-polar too. Personally, I think the bi-polar is not correct but, hey, I'm not a doctor. I missed my C&P exam in Houston TX in Oct 2011 (I moved back to Florida in August 2011 and did not get the notice). ANyway, I got notice in Dec 2011 that my claim for PTSD had been denied because I missed the exam. I went to my county VA office and the "&D&&" filed to wrong request -- he filed an appeal instead of requesting my case be reopened and requesting a new C&P date. Fast forward 3 years and here I am. I had my C&P exam this last Wednesday and personally don't know how it went. The doc was very straight laced with no personality (I think that's the way they're supposed to be). Hadn't slept well in about two-three days and only got about 1 hour on Tuesday night before the exam at 8:00am. I muddled through with the doc -- lasted about 45 min. and the took the mmpi2. The mmpi test results were "questionable validity with some validity scales elevated to the extent that profile interpretation is of limited utility". " Veteran endorsed many psychological symptons on a variety of clinical scales, often reporting moderate to severe levels of intensity. Overall this response pattern may indicate a sense of feeling overwhelmed, though exaggeration of psychological distress cannot be ruled out." Here's the summary of my C&P exam and I'd appreciate any feedback. Semper Fi. 1. Diagnostic Summary --------------------- Does the Veteran have a diagnosis of PTSD that conforms to DSM-5 criteria based on today's evaluation? [X] Yes [ ] No ICD code: 309.28 2. Current Diagnoses -------------------- a. Mental Disorder Diagnosis #1: PTSD Mental Disorder Diagnosis #2: ALCOHOL USE DISORDER Comments, if any: moderate Mental Disorder Diagnosis #3: MOOD DISORDER, NOS b. Medical diagnoses relevant to the understanding or management of the Mental Health Disorder (to include TBI): SEE CPRS 3. Differentiation of symptoms ------------------------------ a. Does the Veteran have more than one mental disorder diagnosed? [X] Yes [ ] No b. Is it possible to differentiate what symptom(s) is/are attributable to each diagnosis? [ ] Yes [X] No [ ] Not applicable (N/A) If no, provide reason that it is not possible to differentiate what portion of each symptom is attributable to each diagnosis and discuss whether there is any clinical association between these diagnoses: SYMPTOMS OVERLAP c. Does the Veteran have a diagnosed traumatic brain injury (TBI)? [ ] Yes [ ] No [X] Not shown in records reviewed 4. Occupational and social impairment ------------------------------------- a. Which of the following best summarizes the Veteran's level of occupational and social impairment with regards to all mental diagnoses? (Check only one) [X] Occupational and social impairment due to mild or transient symptoms which decrease work efficiency and ability to perform occupational tasks only during periods of significant stress, or; symptoms controlled by medication b. For the indicated level of occupational and social impairment, is it possible to differentiate what portion of the occupational and social impairment indicated above is caused by each mental disorder? [ ] Yes [X] No [ ] No other mental disorder has been diagnosed If no, provide reason that it is not possible to differentiate what portion of the indicated level of occupational and social impairment is attributable to each diagnosis: SYMPTOMS OVERLAP c. If a diagnosis of TBI exists, is it possible to differentiate what portion of the occupational and social impairment indicated above is caused by the TBI? [ ] Yes [ ] No [X] No diagnosis of TBI SECTION II: ----------- Clinical Findings: ------------------ 1. Evidence review ------------------ In order to provide an accurate medical opinion, the Veteran's claims folder must be reviewed. a. Medical record review: ------------------------- Was the Veteran's VA e-folder (VBMS or Virtual VA) reviewed? [X] Yes [ ] No Was the Veteran's VA claims file (hard copy paper C-file) reviewed? [X] Yes [ ] No If yes, list any records that were reviewed but were not included in the Veteran's VA claims file: ALL RELEVANT RECORDS REVIEWED If no, check all records reviewed: [ ] Military service treatment records [ ] Military service personnel records [ ] Military enlistment examination [ ] Military separation examination [ ] Military post-deployment questionnaire [ ] Department of Defense Form 214 Separation Documents [ ] Veterans Health Administration medical records (VA treatment records)[ ] Civilian medical records [ ] Interviews with collateral witnesses (family and others who have known the Veteran before and after military service) [ ] No records were reviewed [ ] Other: b. Was pertinent information from collateral sources reviewed? [ ] Yes [X] No f. Other, if any: MILITARY HISTORY Service Discharge Type (Last): HONORABLE Service Branch (Last): MARINE CORPS 1967- 69, 69-79 Service Discharge Type (NTL): HONORABLE Service Branch (NTL): MARINE CORPS Service Entry Date (NTL): Did the veteran have combat experience: YES Combat service location: Vietnam 1968-69 Duties: Were combat wounds sustained: no Any mental health tx: NONE 3. Stressors ------------ Describe one or more specific stressor event(s) the Veteran considers traumatic (may be pre-military, military, or post-military): a. Stressor #1: SEE MILTARY HISTORY Does this stressor meet Criterion A (i.e., is it adequate to support the diagnosis of PTSD)? [X] Yes [ ] No Is the stressor related to the Veteran's fear of hostile military or terrorist activity? [X] Yes [ ] No Is the stressor related to personal assault, e.g. military sexual trauma? [ ] Yes [X] No 4. PTSD Diagnostic Criteria --------------------------- Please check criteria used for establishing the current PTSD diagnosis. Do NOT mark symptoms below that are clearly not attributable to the Criteria A stressor/PTSD. Instead, overlapping symptoms clearly attributable to other things should be noted under #7 - Other symptoms. The diagnostic criteria for PTSD, referred to as Criteria A-H, are from the Diagnostic and Statistical Manual of Mental Disorders, 5th edition (DSM-5). Criterion A: Exposure to actual or threatened a) death, b) serious injury, c) sexual violation, in one or more of the following ways: [X] Directly experiencing the traumatic event(s) [X] Witnessing, in person, the traumatic event(s) as they occurred to others Criterion B: Presence of (one or more) of the following intrusion Symptoms associated with the traumatic event(s), beginning after the traumatic event(s) occurred: [X] Recurrent, involuntary, and intrusive distressing memories of the traumatic event(s). [X] Intense or prolonged psychological distress at exposure to Internal or external cues that symbolize or resemble an aspect of the traumatic event(s). [X] Marked physiological reactions to internal or external cues that symbolize or resemble an aspect of the traumatic event(s). Criterion C: Persistent avoidance of stimuli associated with the Traumatic event(s), beginning after the traumatic events(s) occurred, as evidenced by one or both of the following: [X] Avoidance of or efforts to avoid distressing memories, thoughts, or feelings about or closely associated with the traumatic event(s). [X] Avoidance of or efforts to avoid external reminders (people, places, conversations, activities, objects, situations) that arouse distressing memories, thoughts, or feelings about or closely associated with the traumatic event(s). Criterion D: Negative alterations in cognitions and mood associated with the traumatic event(s), beginning or worsening after the traumatic event(s) occurred, as evidenced by two (or more) of the following: [X] Inability to remember an important aspect of the traumatic event(s)(typically due to dissociative amnesia and not to other factors such as head injury, alcohol, or drugs). [X] Persistent negative emotional state (e.g., fear, horror, anger,guilt, or shame). [X] Persistent inability to experience positive emotions (e.g., inability to experience happiness, satisfaction, or loving feelings.) Criterion E: Marked alterations in arousal and reactivity associated with the traumatic event(s), beginning or worsening after the traumatic event(s) occurred, as evidenced by two (or more) of the following: [X] Irritable behavior and angry outbursts (with little or no provocation) typically expressed as verbal or physical aggression toward people or objects. [X] Exaggerated startle response. [X] Problems with concentration. [X] Sleep disturbance (e.g., difficulty falling or staying asleep or restless sleep). Criterion F: [X] Duration of the disturbance (Criteria B, C, D, and E) is more than 1 month. Criterion G: [X] The disturbance causes clinically significant distress or impairment in social, occupational, or other important areas of functioning. Criterion H: [X] The disturbance is not attributable to the physiological effects of a substance (e.g., medication, alcohol) or another medical condition. Criterion I: Which stressor(s) contributed to the Veteran's PTSD diagnosis?: [X] Stressor #1 5. Symptoms ----------- For VA rating purposes, check all symptoms that actively apply to the Veteran's diagnoses: [X] Depressed mood [X] Anxiety [X] Chronic sleep impairment [X] Mild memory loss, such as forgetting names, directions or recent events [X] Disturbances of motivation and mood [X] Difficulty in establishing and maintaining effective work and social relationships 6. Behavioral Observations -------------------------- OTHER PSYCHIATRIC SYMPTOMS Today the veteran reports "I'm very agitated, didn't sleep well. Nerves raw" Current stressors: health The veteran described/endorsed the following symptoms associated with depression: Withdrawn, isolation, anhedonia, depressed mood, low energy, poor sleep, poor attention and concentration, forgetfulness, change in appetite, crying spells, guilt, helpless, hopeless, and worthless. Frequency of Symptoms: 4-5 days a week Duration of Symptoms: hours Onset of Symptoms: years Severity of Symptoms: mild to moderate The veteran described/endorsed the following symptoms associated with anxiety: restlessness or feeling keyed up or on edge, easily fatigued, difficulty concentrating or mind going blank, irritability, muscle tension, sleep disturbance, excessive worrying, second guesses, what if?, difficulties with decisions Frequency of Symptoms: frequently Duration of Symptoms: minutes Onset of Symptoms: years Severity of Symptoms: mild to moderate The veteran described/endorsed the following symptoms associated with Mania: inflated self esteem, decreased need for sleep, pressured speech, FOI, distractibility, increased goal-directed activities, reckless behaviors Frequency of Symptoms: no recent manic episdoes, often has bouts of depression Duration of Symptoms: hours Onset of Symptoms:years Severity of Symptoms:mild to moderate Denies psychosis MENTAL STATUS EXAM: Appearance: clean, neatly groomed, casually dressed Orientation: AOX4 Mood: subdued, mildly agitated Affect: constricted Attitude: cooperative Speech rate and tone: Unremarkable Language: Good Thought content and progression: Unimpaired Tangentiality: none Circumstantiality: none Loose associations: none Flight of ideas: none Delusional: none Difficulty in understanding complex commands: none Gross impairment in thought processes or communication: none Hallucinations: not present Delusions: not present Grossly inappropriate behavior: none Memory: Mild memory loss, such as forgetting names, directions or recent events Attention and concentration: "its shot" Fund of knowledge: Good Intelligence: average Insight and judgment: fair Abstract Reasoning: wnl and a function of intelligence not reduced by mood Obsessive-compulsive: used to be organized , now less so. Sleep impairment: chronic difficulties with delayed onset, has sleep apnea ADLs: no impact from mental disorder Suicidal ideation: in past Homicidal ideation: none Persistent danger of hurting self or others: none Relationships: limited to partner (see social history for details) Has difficulty with people, easily irritated in dealing with others. 7. Other symptoms ----------------- Does the Veteran have any other symptoms attributable to PTSD (and other mental disorders) that are not listed above? [ ] Yes [X] No 8. Competency ------------- Is the Veteran capable of managing his or her financial affairs? [X] Yes [ ] No 9. Remarks, (including any testing results) if any -------------------------------------------------- MMPI2 RF- profile of questionable validity with some validity scales elevated to the extent that profile interpretation is of limited utility. Veteran endorsed many psychological symptoms on a variety of clinical scales, often reporting moderate to severe levels of intensity. Overall this response pattern may indicate a sense of feeling overwhelmed, though exaggeration of psychological distress cannot be ruled out. NOTE: VA may request additional medical information, including additional examinations if necessary to complete VA's review of the Veteran's application. =========================================================================

I wasn't sure what to title this and where to put it. timeline: November 2011, rated 70 % SC for MH. Including PTSD, Bipolar, yadda yadda. 2011-Present time, Lots of counselings and changing of Meds. About a month ago, I went to my regular physical doctor at VA. I told her that I still have suicidal thoughts. She made me see the counselor. I talked to counselor in October, and she made an appointment for me on Nov 10, 2014. She said I can bring my wife if I wanted to, and I did. We shot the bull and talked about how things were getting better for us, etc. I am trying to get back in shape and started walking/jogging a while back. Also, I need to add, that my VA psychiatrist changed my drugs from one thing to Lithium. I told the counselor that I believe the drugs were a good thing, so far. I noticed on my BlueButton MyHealtheVet, that she marked that I was doing better, etc, etc, etc.. Well, for one, I don't want to talk about all the bad stuff when my wife is sitting next to me. Because everything I say will be used against me (trust me). I get a call this Monday, (17 November) from the C&P people. They said I need to come in for a C&P re-evaluation or a yearly evaluation for my MH claim. 19 November, I showed up at this C&P reevaluation, and the Dr. asked, Do you know why you are here? I said no ma'am. And she explained that the VA was making sure that I was being properly taken care of, and that my benefits didn't need to be bumped up. When I was in the office with this Dr., my body felt like it was on fire. My chest started beating fast. My hands were shaking. I was crying, etc. She asked me to tell her what the following meant, "Don't Count your chickens before they hatch". I just repeated it like a fool like 5 or so times. I honestly believe that the new drug that they gave me started to kick in. She wanted to put me in the Mental Jail, But she kept asking me if I wanted to go there, but I told her, I prefer not. She said, what if I make you? I said, you got to do what you go to do, but I Prefer not. Those people in the mental ward are literally crazy people. I'm depressed and act all weird, but I'm not "crazy" like some of those. In the mental ward, there was this one guy that kept shitting on everything. I'm not like that. I'm glad that she seen me in my bad times, since it was a C&P exam. But, I am so Scared that they are going to re-evaluate me and say that I don't deserve the 70% that I get. I already feel as though I am using the system, and it makes me feel really bad for having to "prove" my insanity. I wish I could go back in time and not ever go to the VA. I want life to be like it was before I went to Afghanistan in 2011. Anyway, if these post are supposed to be in the form of a question, What is the chances of them downgrading my % ?

Yes it's true. I'm clean now and Crackheads hate me, My jealous family hates me, other jealous vets hate vve course on my ex girlfriend hate me, all my old lying therapist hate me, but thanks to this site I got the right advice and file the right claim and got a hundred percent. First time for bipolar. gaf score of 51, 20 to 25 times in and out of VA rehab, a few lockdown, jail homelessness etc cetera. what the most important thing...is that I love me today!

I apologize in advance for being all over the place. The short version of my story is that I am SC (80%) Bipolar(50%) Hypertension(30%) Headaches(10%) Back(10%) Neck(10%) Bunionectomy left foot (10%) bunionectomy right foot (10%) Parotidectomy (10%) Scar(0%) I think this is all and if not I know I am 80%. I have a C&P appointment for an increase in several (migraines, back, neck) and some new ones (tinnitus -worked on flight line but never claimed it, IBS or GERD - due to the bipolar and depression) I am a 29 yr old vet have recently suffered a loss of my newborn, Elijah James Barker before birth at 39 weeks 3 days and have been an emotional wreck since then. His due date was Christmas day and he was born 3 days before. I have been advised not to drive because I envision running into trees. (I have ended up in ICU before for overdosing after divorce. I called the suicide hotline and have been going to classes but I don't know if anything can help how I feel. I work in a hospital and one of the girls that i worked with was due 3 weeks after me. I dont like being in hospitals or around pregnant people and though i know i have to move on with my life (everyone else has seemed to) I don't know how I can. I know I can't stay like this forever but I feel I'm being forced into doing things I'm not ready for. I'd rather take it at my own pace but don't think I'd be able to keep my job. And everyday life is hard as well. It's even hard for me to be around my 9 year old son with developmental delay and ADHD and give him the support that he needs at times. I don't go to places where i know an abundance of babies will be and if i go to a grocery store will avoid going down aisles if there is someone pregnant or with a baby. I have breakdowns a lot and other times i feel numb and i just want my baby. I hate going outside because I feel like no one understands (of course they dont because i look like everyone else in the world, normal. but i feel far from that) I need to work to support my family but I don't have the motivation or energy anymore. And I detest going back to work because my coworker's baby is fine (Im guessing because I haven't talked to or seen her, and she has been respectful and not posted anything online about it but i know she delivered her baby and got to take him home, instead of taking home a box of clothes and pics.) I also dont want to have to be in a hospital where I will be around babies and pregnant people. I don't even know why I'm writing anymore. Oh, because I cannot concentrate on anything and wonder how to go about this exam. Exclude this information from the doctor or tell him. Should i go back to work? Does this even warrant not going to work? i dont know. Everyone says time. it will take time. How much time? I dont think any amount of time will make this better. I dont know if it is because it's so fresh. I feel more comfortable at home in my own surroundings with my husband. I dont know anymore and this has turned out to be longer than I expected. Thank you for your help.