ptsd Ptsd The Demon

[sgmdae]

I went through some old boxes, and I found some items that has placed me in frame of mind I have never been.

It Madness, fear, shame, and more reality the harm my behavior has caused. Remember a month, I didn't know PTSD existed

I thought my way of thinking and doing was ok

Let me share, so I can Purge

1996- Ft wingate, New Mexico, Shannon 17 years old student writes a note to me: I deeply concerned about your behavior, you have not been yourself, the students are concerned your not spending anytime with us. I tried to talk to you, we feel your not telling us something. Kimberly, Fidelia, Sherylynn, Gilbert, Paulson feel the same. But the way your acting is concerning us. Don't get mad, we want you to know we Care.

This job, I walk out on in the middle of school year.

The behavior was cause by a relationship that went sour. Here is what Kathy said in a letter I found and forgot about: Darryle today I got a restraining order placed on you because your frightening me, your drunkeness, Saturday night, the weapon thing, your being placed on leave because of your breakdown ( no truth to that, I don't think) the calls, the threats, going to my work place, and you stalking me, I will not live in a life of fear.

I am becoming very ashamed, because I had incidents one after another through the years

Edited July 23, 2009 by sgmdae

[Pete53]

Most kids will not do that you are a lucky man. I would use the note to get the benefits that were earned.

[Guest Ryan]

Saying PTSD is likened to a demon is a pretty accurate portrail. IMHO

[Cavtrooper088]

Hang tough SGM. The counseling will help. It will be hard, but open up and talk about the memories and yes the demons. They'll help you.

Cav

[sgmdae]

Its a damn shame that a 17 year student, could see their was problem and had the courage to tell me about it. Where were the adults, that could of said something, and just maybe my path of behavior could of been curtailed earlier in my life.

[sgmdae]

Thank you for the kind e-mails, there no reason to feel sorry for what happen, just guide me in doing what is needed to get help and a fair rating

[sharon]

PTSD - It is what it is and it does what it does.