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Need Support - Hitting The Wall

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VetsLady

Question

Recently I have posted a few discussions on the BVA forum and Success Forum.

a little background, my husband is sc for AO DM2 and related conditions.....in speaking with the VA today,

they said a Nehmer claim has already been opened for him due to IHD and we don't need to file one or

a reopening of his DM2 claim. Is this right ... ?

Also, please lift me my spirits - it's been an almost 8 year wait to get his appeal sc (not the DM2 issue, something else)

Finally, BVA sc him....he had an exam recently by QTC - the doctor told us it was only to determine his current disability....

not a rating exam and she had no prior medical records....it was in her words "the VA wanted me to see him, exam him

and send in my findings".......I'm trying keep the holes patched in the boat best I can ... we have Hardship attached and

Congressional Inquiry.....I know things will be what they are and we are in line just like everyone else....

What I need is a pat on the shoulder or one to shed a few tears on....actually, as I write this they are pouring down my face....

Due to medical reasons, it's been a severe financial hardship....he was a Cat 8 up until his sc in 08 so all of his chemo treatment

was from private doctors since at that time we had insurance that picked up 80% - but when we're talking 6500 a month in RX's

and we're paying 20% for 2 years, I wonder if I can file to get it reimbursed.....if he'd had treatment at the VA Center, they would

not have done what his private doctors did for him.....I know that, unfortunate as it seems. I always said we'd spend every dime

we had to ensure he receives treatment he needed and it looks like that is what's happened.

I really need uplifting comments right now, I'm carrying alot of weight on my shoulders and my support system is very minimal......

It's tough enough dealing with a chronic disabling illness and add to that 8 years of dealing with the VA, any encouraging words

would be appreciated.

Thank you for your time....

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Vetslady, I want to thank you for standing by your partner through thick and thin. I was very lucky to have found a wife who could live with me and the monsters that I brought back with me. (28 years and counting) I too came from a family that had three sons in the service during the Vietnam era. My older brother and I were in RVN at the same time.( the ignorant kid signed a waiver) I was so relieved when he ETS'ed back to the states.

Most of us have hit that wall of which you speak. In these times of economic struggle the wall seems to be taller and thicker. But if you hit that wall enough it will come falling down!

Good things comes to good people, you have already proved that you are a stand up lady. Don't let them get you down, keeping fighting.

Dave

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You have fought the fight and have WON! Not only pat yourself on your back but rest assured your efforts have helped someone you love very much.

I do wonder sometimes where I would be with out my wife but that thought is not very comforting I thank each and everyday she puts up with me!

By standing by your man you have showed your resolve and commitment to your Vietnam vet!

God Bless you and ALL the other ladies out there that have done the same!!

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Thank you for the replies....,

I know I'm not alone in this.

God has been with me each step of the way.

Still, some days are tougher than others,

This week has been a tough one.

Will find some productive project to work on

this weekend...for me, that helps.

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Have to keep busy or I get engulfed in the thought of the rating process....

We are still waiting for his appeal rating, I do know that the QTC doctors report went to the RO

electronically yesterday. It wasn't a "rating" exam....it was to determine the current "level of

disability" based on my husbands recent sc from the BVA.

His file is marked EXPEDITE and flagged every way it can be. His sc condition is worsening

(the one he is already being comped for) and my gut is in knots.

I can look in the mirror and give advice to the lady looking back - but it's not easy.

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Vetslady, that sure seems like an appropriate name for you. I know how you feel, it's very hard to watch a loved one suffer through no fault of his own. Life is not fair sometimes. I always get a sinking feeling in my stomach when I find something else out about E's service connected conditions. E and I will keep you and your husband in our thoughts and prayers. If you want to send me a PM and I'll be glad to talk to you!! This group will never let you down and I don't intend to either. You are truly someone who needs to be proud of herself. Love a Hadit friend

Carolyn

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