stillhere Posted February 27, 2011 Share Posted February 27, 2011 I have been 100% P/T and SMC-s since September of 09. While I don't tell many folks I am SSDI also I do tell a few and I almost always come away with the "well you look great" from most. Kind of makes me feel like I should be working, but I know I can't this tends to add to my PTSD/depression and just wondered if other vets out there get the same thing? I mean I do not walk with a cane or ride a scooter BUT I do have a bad heart and shy away from doing anything to strenuous yet the statement you look great still kind of upsets me. Oh Well i worked for 50 years and I deserve a break I guess. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
JHawks Posted February 27, 2011 Share Posted February 27, 2011 I have been 100% P/T and SMC-s since September of 09. While I don't tell many folks I am SSDI also I do tell a few and I almost always come away with the "well you look great" from most. Kind of makes me feel like I should be working, but I know I can't this tends to add to my PTSD/depression and just wondered if other vets out there get the same thing? I mean I do not walk with a cane or ride a scooter BUT I do have a bad heart and shy away from doing anything to strenuous yet the statement you look great still kind of upsets me. Oh Well i worked for 50 years and I deserve a break I guess. You should NEVER feel bad about any benefits you get from the VA. You earned those benefits. Take pride in the fact you are a Disabled Veteran. You are part of a very elite group of people that went through hell in back for your country. There is no shame in any of that. Let your country take care of you now. I've run into people that ask me why I have DV tags on my car. When I tell them I am a Disabled Veteran they also say "You look fine to me". Then I ask them what branch of service they were in and the majority reply they never served. That speaks volumes to their lack of understanding. I generally reply back that had they served their country they might understand why I happen to be a Disabled Veteran. NEVER be ashamed. Be proud that you stepped forward for your country. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
carlie Posted February 27, 2011 Share Posted February 27, 2011 I try to keep my personal business to my self - as I too have experienced similar responses. I just don't bring it up. If someone ask me I tell them that I made some good investments early in life. Sometimes people, even family members, will try to use information against you. It's no ones business and I think sometimes we just give out TMI. Don't let them get to you - you earned whatever you have. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Moderator broncovet Posted February 27, 2011 Moderator Share Posted February 27, 2011 About 10 years ago, I was reading something from disabled individuals asking the question "should you disclose (your disability) or not?"...in reference to the job interview. The consensus was to do what ever you feel comfortable with. In other words, if you want to tell people you are disabled, then go ahead. Use the handicapped license plate, heck even wear a t shirt, if you like. On the other hand, if you would rather not disclose, then by all means the discussions you have with your doctor(s) as well as your disability payments, or lack of them, or other personal finances are very private and you need not discuss them. As for myself, I have "changed". In other words I used to wear my hearing aids "proudly" and let people know. Now, I dont let anyone know UNLESS I think they have a need to know. Back to the job thing. People with disabilities have an unemployment rate in the 50-90% range. It is extremely difficult to get a job if you have a significant disability. Also, dont count on the government, or EEO to help you. I have been turned down for dozens of jobs that I was qualifed for, even at the VA, with a college degree, and even as a disabled Vet, over the years. They often hired non degreed people who are not Veterans, and then did not consider me when I did have a degree and was a Veteran. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
VetsLady Posted February 28, 2011 Share Posted February 28, 2011 (edited) I have been 100% P/T and SMC-s since September of 09. While I don't tell many folks I am SSDI also I do tell a few and I almost always come away with the "well you look great" from most. Kind of makes me feel like I should be working, but I know I can't this tends to add to my PTSD/depression and just wondered if other vets out there get the same thing? I mean I do not walk with a cane or ride a scooter BUT I do have a bad heart and shy away from doing anything to strenuous yet the statement you look great still kind of upsets me. Oh Well i worked for 50 years and I deserve a break I guess. If you met my husband today, you would never know he is as sick of a man as he is. Other than losing weight, which actually made him look younger and pretty dang fit, he doesn't look ill at all. But, folks don't see the behind the scenes things that go on that I do ...... between the two of us, we make light of it knowing that if he were turned inside out, he might not look as well as he does ! When someone remarks in a saracastic way (and you know there are some who do) he just tell them " Oh I might look good on the outside but you should see the inside !" ....... usually it shuts them up in a polite way. Please don't ever let the feeling of being uncomfortable last any longer than 60 seconds, let it come and then let it go. A disability is an inability to perform or do things the way you once could or the way others can do. YOU are a whole and total human being as you are. Let your light shine Stillhere .... Let it shine brightly to pave the way for those following in your footsteps. Edited February 28, 2011 by VetsLady Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
HadIt.com Elder Pete53 Posted February 28, 2011 HadIt.com Elder Share Posted February 28, 2011 Most of the time people just ask cause its sort of a conversation starter. I was 49 when I got SSD and 51 when I got 100% P&T. I learned that its better to ignore the question and just ask them a question. We don't need to explain a thing to anyone. The truth is it is none of their business. I used to tell a joke of sorts " I work for the Government but they don't know it" Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Recommended Posts