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Oh Boy!?

maset22

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maset22 Community Regular

maset22

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My mind feels like a maze, tomorrow is my re-evaluation, and the way I feel is confuse, at 100% my thinking is only down is the road; But, my state of mind concerns me more.

Also tomorrow looks like my last visit with my first Dr. He has been on and mostly off my treatment. I feel sad in loosing Him. Plus my group called PTSD GRADUATES, ask me to take a break for a while, sensing that I might need more basic care.

Looking at my schedule ending in November, V. A. Has giving me a new Dr. For a new group. I have a problem in that I want to be close to the V.A. Group, but I don't want to go back thru PE, nor CPT, or IN VIVO, which I have done, and do not want to open up the scars that they left, yes they did some good, but I am happy in my house, walking my dogs, and caring for my roses.

What else do they want? No public for me, I don't care for it. Avoidance, yes, but I am OK with it. Would V.A. Dump me soon, since I don't go along with thire program? Oh Boy! I would be loss.

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SP4RVN1971 Mentor

SP4RVN1971

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My mind feels like a maze, tomorrow is my re-evaluation, and the way I feel is confuse, at 100% my thinking is only down is the road; But, my state of mind concerns me more.

Also tomorrow looks like my last visit with my first Dr. He has been on and mostly off my treatment. I feel sad in loosing Him. Plus my group called PTSD GRADUATES, ask me to take a break for a while, sensing that I might need more basic care.

Looking at my schedule ending in November, V. A. Has giving me a new Dr. For a new group. I have a problem in that I want to be close to the V.A. Group, but I don't want to go back thru PE, nor CPT, or IN VIVO, which I have done, and do not want to open up the scars that they left, yes they did some good, but I am happy in my house, walking my dogs, and caring for my roses.

What else do they want? No public for me, I don't care for it. Avoidance, yes, but I am OK with it. Would V.A. Dump me soon, since I don't go along with thire program? Oh Boy! I would be loss.

Maset22, It sound like you been there and back in life, and it looks like you have defeated a lot of them damn devil.

With every corner in my life i worry now, but I get around that corner and there sunshine.

You have a happiness in your home, got your dog and smell the roses!

Sounds pretty good to me!!smile.png

Oh the new Dr., you will probably like him, and VA will never leave you, and remember you have the HADIT family that will never leave you!!!!

God bless and good luck

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maset22 Community Regular

maset22

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Thanks Notorious Kelly, as I went to my first appt. the TV was on the news, I had heard about our Flag been desecrated and one person dead yesterday, but today as I waited for the Dr. The real or clearer news came out. It was a Big Trigger for me. I saw the sand and dust from my time in the box, tears roll down my face. I could not stop for a while. Then the Dr. Came and we had a good session were my concerns were express. I will get my progress notes tomorrow. Plus the Dr. Gave me another appt. for Oct.

This new group is about as basic of PTSD, it is actually more class than a group, so I have been told.

My C&P was also close to my first appt. so I still was still emotionally drained. That Dr. Was gentle, and was on point. At the end He acknowledge my PTSD and Depresion, now is just time to see the results. It has been a long day.

SP4RVN1971, Yes I believe God has bless me with a wife that's my anchor, my dogs, roses, I did not mention my Keyboard that I still can't play, but sweet music to my ears, and you are also right about our Hadit Family, never leave no one behind.

To all, be strong, "our mind can be our worst fear". Is that an original? Don't give up

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