tdiu Will I Escape My Anti-Social World

[82airborne]

Well this is a new thread. I have completed a 16 week course of psychotherapy in a group of about 10-15 people. I have realized I prefer being alone away from strangers. I hate going to hospitals and it's a bunch of STrANGE individuals around me. Right now I'm feeling extra jittery lightheaded shaky all of the above. My question is how will psychs are MEDS stop these crazy thoughts that I have. Will I stay jittery. I swear I take about close to tn pills a day my primary are physician says that my liver points are up. It could be because of the pills I don't know. That's one reason I been paranoid of going to the doctor. When I didn't go to the doctor all my lab results was fine. Now that I keep current with doctors it seems my health s getting worse and worse. Ok I'm 90% disabled my income is ok and stable but it as done nothing far as my mind and the way I think. So I realize like a said months ago no money in the world would benefit you if your mind isn't right. So yes I plan on staying in therapy just not group counseling. I will only leave the house for doctor visits and psych visits. I will avoid being around strangers because I still have a very violent side that's easily provoked. This February I turn 40. Will I part I doubt it. I have no real. Desire to party with others. Even with my family I have mild desires of being with. So this is where I'm at right now. My insurance waiver has been waived for 10,000 dollars of insurance I called the insurance to check and make sure I was right because in my health right now death. Is certan to my future. I told her I was 90% disabled and my fees was waived she said the only way it was waived if I was Lund totally disabled. So I guess they got me at 10O% disable they just haven't told me. I don't know. I plan on calling the 800 number to check to see if I need to submit anything for the tdiu part of my claim. OOOOH well today starts a new chapter of my life after group therapy. Once again THANX for having me one more time. This place have helped me get through many miserable nights when insomnia reared it's ugly head after I wrote out my thoughts on here I was able to go to sleep so I guess venting helps

[82airborne]

I can't really stand being out in public either . When i'm anywhere but home I notice I move way too quickly . I have a dr's appt tomorrow with my dual clinic psych- Excited about it . As for group counseling , kinda socially detached from normal civilians . I enjoy it when I see a veteran wearing his cap that says war vet . I grin inside . I can't stand the thoughts I have about people , they don't make sense , so I stay home unless I have business to tend to , Aarons to run , or family or medical reasons. Just venting , thanks soulja

Home is a safe haven. I just turned on the blues.

[Tbird]

I listen to audio books from audible.com beforee i go to sleep it keeps my mind from drifting to places that it does not belong. I also listen to some tibetan bells chiming and just focus on my breathing, this takes practice, but I got nothing but time.