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Will I Escape My Anti-Social World

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82airborne

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Well this is a new thread. I have completed a 16 week course of psychotherapy in a group of about 10-15 people. I have realized I prefer being alone away from strangers. I hate going to hospitals and it's a bunch of STrANGE individuals around me. Right now I'm feeling extra jittery lightheaded shaky all of the above. My question is how will psychs are MEDS stop these crazy thoughts that I have. Will I stay jittery. I swear I take about close to tn pills a day my primary are physician says that my liver points are up. It could be because of the pills I don't know. That's one reason I been paranoid of going to the doctor. When I didn't go to the doctor all my lab results was fine. Now that I keep current with doctors it seems my health s getting worse and worse. Ok I'm 90% disabled my income is ok and stable but it as done nothing far as my mind and the way I think. So I realize like a said months ago no money in the world would benefit you if your mind isn't right. So yes I plan on staying in therapy just not group counseling. I will only leave the house for doctor visits and psych visits. I will avoid being around strangers because I still have a very violent side that's easily provoked. This February I turn 40. Will I part I doubt it. I have no real. Desire to party with others. Even with my family I have mild desires of being with. So this is where I'm at right now. My insurance waiver has been waived for 10,000 dollars of insurance I called the insurance to check and make sure I was right because in my health right now death. Is certan to my future. I told her I was 90% disabled and my fees was waived she said the only way it was waived if I was Lund totally disabled. So I guess they got me at 10O% disable they just haven't told me. I don't know. I plan on calling the 800 number to check to see if I need to submit anything for the tdiu part of my claim. OOOOH well today starts a new chapter of my life after group therapy. Once again THANX for having me one more time. This place have helped me get through many miserable nights when insomnia reared it's ugly head after I wrote out my thoughts on here I was able to go to sleep so I guess venting helps

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TOO MANY PEOPLE TO WATCH

Those of us who are anti social usually had something or saw something commited by another human being that is so shocking or violent, that we cannot trust the human species ever again. its a lonely existance but at least we feel safe and dont have to deal with the " issues " of others. SO many times ive trusted, and been wronged. I trust God my dog, my wife, and my .45.

I feel exactly the same. Sometimes I wish I was on a deserted island
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Airborne, always remember this. humans are basically put together emotionally the same way., what pissed me off, likely pisses u off, what makes me sad, makes others sad, what makes me feel guilt makes other feel guilt. we are all wired very similar. We live in a mean, violent, dangerous , uncertain world, and we are all just trying to live out our little life, the best we can,. dont put too much on your shoulders. Just live, one day at a time. You never know how the day will turn out and its usually totally different than you think it will.

Like Jesus said, dont worry abt things in days advance, live the day your in, and enjoy it as best u can.

keep on keepin on,.

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Airborne, always remember this. humans are basically put together emotionally the same way., what pissed me off, likely pisses u off, what makes me sad, makes others sad, what makes me feel guilt makes other feel guilt. we are all wired very similar. We live in a mean, violent, dangerous , uncertain world, and we are all just trying to live out our little life, the best we can,. dont put too much on your shoulders. Just live, one day at a time. You never know how the day will turn out and its usually totally different than you think it will.

Like Jesus said, dont worry abt things in days advance, live the day your in, and enjoy it as best u can.

keep on keepin on,.

Excellent advice. THANX. I'm just taking it day by day
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Hello world. Ok I went to a buffet. It was people running around like crazy. This is one thing that bothers me over crowded loud places. How can I stop from freaking out at restaurants stores. Ok a place that I enjoyed was black angus. Yes they was expensive but it was a quiet place nobody was running around I was able to relax. So I'm guessing that if I want to enjoy a nice place out I need to avoid places that has a lot of people. I wonder will my violent thoughts ever go away. Of course I don't act out on them but they are DEFINATELY there I'm really realizing my only way to stay out of jail is to confine myself in isolation. I want to go to school but guess what it's out of the question. Last time I went to school I spent two weeks in the bushes waiting for a student to come. He rubbed me the wrong way. It's like my mind talks to me. What I mean by that is that my when I get into confrontation with somebody my mind it's a voice that some how taunts me telling me that the person is a threat and my mind will not let me rest until I get closure thru finding the perpetrator and confirm that he is not going to be a future threat. Sorry if I'm being to graphic I apologize but you guys are all I have. Something snapped in my head long time ago and I want to be a loving member of society. Even tho I love love love being alone. I wouldn't mind going out with my family without thinking something going to happen. Also I been on prazosin for nightmares I'm up to six pills and guess what my nightmares have returned. Why I don't know but it seems these Prazosin only work for a little time then my nightmares are right back by abnormal. Could it be my physical condition that has my mind going astray. Will I be like I am for the rest of my life. I blow up in a drop of a pin from 0-100 In one second then it seems as if I feed of people fear. I'm like doctor jeckel and mr Hyde. When I'm around people I get horrible images of violent things. Ok at this point I've had MEDS psychotherapy group counseling and I feel the same as I felt before I sought out help for my mental health issues. My hands or extra jittery my legs shake when I'm around people. I plan on keep GOIN to counseling until something unsnap inside my head. Well that's it for now. I apologize If I was to graphic I just had to vent. Maybe it's a cry for help idk. OOOOH well GOOODNIGHT until we meet again SOLDIERS

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82nd. I only read your first post, I hope somehow today you are feeling a tad better, one thing that I know is that you are not alone with these symptoms, always seek help, even if you don't feel like it is helping, try to get a one on one treatment, I can say these things from my own experiences, don't give up on yourself, take it easy and have compassion to yourself. I am here in fayetteville, so if you think we can assist each other let me know. Hold on 82nd. Let's put a smile on your face and heart. Dan

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82nd. I only read your first post, I hope somehow today you are feeling a tad better, one thing that I know is that you are not alone with these symptoms, always seek help, even if you don't feel like it is helping, try to get a one on one treatment, I can say these things from my own experiences, don't give up on yourself, take it easy and have compassion to yourself. I am here in fayetteville, so if you think we can assist each other let me know. Hold on 82nd. Let's put a smile on your face and heart. Dan

:-) I loved Fayetteville ft Bragg. I plan on staying with one on one counseling. Staying on my prescribed MEDS. My doctor at kaiser I actually like seeing him. He gets me out of The house. I'm just trying to be KOOL as possible. THANX for the support and kind words.

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