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82airborne

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Well now that my claim is finished I'm trying to discharge my student loans so my credit will get better. The vocational rehab guy keep telling me about school. I might as well go to the prison and ask them to enroll MEE. At this point me and people do not mix. Also I don't want to commit to anything. Before I do anything I need to get my health together. I'm pretty much bleeding from time to time out of both ends. Yes. Old doc say my liver point is up most likely to being a alcoholic when I was in my twenties. I been avoiding all contact with unknown people. All I really want. It is not money for school but I just want my credit to get right where I can get a home loan then I pretty much want to disappear to the suburbs of California. Education I can read books. I have no desire to be around people. I walk with a cane every day. I see people looking at me then turning they head when i look they way. But not to stray from what I'm saying I put in for a school loan discharge so I will attempt on letting YALL know how it helps my credit if it do. So this is where I'm at now still going to the psych and medical doctors at the va. So my main goal is to pretty much disappear but not disappear from society.

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Try Voc Regab after they determine you are not employable they will often help you out with stuff to make your wished come true.

Thanx for the info. I been going to vocational rehab my counselor wants me to go to school whether it's online or in public. In public is out of the question and online I just don't want to commit. So I will keep YALL posted as I keep going to vocational rehab

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82nd, I feel you bud. I never thought that I would be hurt and retired at 30. I will be 32 next month and I am just trying to focus on my Wife and Daughters, a good Dog, and a 1961 Impala that I bought a while back. I live on the Lake and I would rather listen to Wild Animals than a Selfish, Awful society that along with the Govt, they do not care about us. God bless all of you, and so sorry that any of us even had to go thru all this crap in the Military. Take care of what little you got, because in the end, it is all that matters.

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Well, here it is Valentines day and I just got home from work. My wife and three daughters had made plans to go out this evening to dinner and see a movie. I told them I just have no desires to go out in public and being around a bunch of people.

It's seems everything is so familiar with what 82 airborne is going through, I have the same thoughts and feeling's of depression and wanting isolation, I just want to be by myself, no crowds, no hostility, loud noses, etc. Having PTSD and depression sucks.

Then having Normal Pressure hydrocephalus (due to all the loud booms from 5"/52 caliber cannon) that I was assigned to during General Quarters, and being electrocuted by 440 volts of electricity while active duty, is now really catching up with me. I had to have a shunt put into my skull to drain the excess cerebral fluid from my skull into my abdomen, so I don't have either a stroke or a Aneurysm, I have no desires for any outside public surrounding, just being in my own home, I feel safe and enjoy my isolation.

My daughters and my wife see the depression I am going through and they try to get me to go out with them as a family, but I just have no motivation to be around people. I get very agitated very quickly, as before I joined the Navy, I was a happy go lucky person, had lots of friends, enjoyed going to clubs, the beach etc.

I was seeing the V A psychiatrist doc when I first started my disability claim and was very reluctant to show my real feelings, and still hold alot of my feelings inside, can't seem to open up, which I believe is causing my depression.

Hopely one day I can just let it all out.

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Well, here it is Valentines day and I just got home from work. My wife and three daughters had made plans to go out this evening to dinner and see a movie. I told them I just have no desires to go out in public and being around a bunch of people.

It's seems everything is so familiar with what 82 airborne is going through, I have the same thoughts and feeling's of depression and wanting isolation, I just want to be by myself, no crowds, no hostility, loud noses, etc. Having PTSD and depression sucks.

Then having Normal Pressure hydrocephalus (due to all the loud booms from 5"/52 caliber cannon) that I was assigned to during General Quarters, and being electrocuted by 440 volts of electricity while active duty, is now really catching up with me. I had to have a shunt put into my skull to drain the excess cerebral fluid from my skull into my abdomen, so I don't have either a stroke or a Aneurysm, I have no desires for any outside public surrounding, just being in my own home, I feel safe and enjoy my isolation.

My daughters and my wife see the depression I am going through and they try to get me to go out with them as a family, but I just have no motivation to be around people. I get very agitated very quickly, as before I joined the Navy, I was a happy go lucky person, had lots of friends, enjoyed going to clubs, the beach etc.

I was seeing the V A psychiatrist doc when I first started my disability claim and was very reluctant to show my real feelings, and still hold alot of my feelings inside, can't seem to open up, which I believe is causing my depression.

Hopely one day I can just let it all out.

Man I got dressed about 4:30 I had plans on taking my lady out buying her a anklet nothing expensive. Guess what after limping in and out of the shower getting jazzed up. She comes home from work at about 7:30 TALKIN about she don't want Togo no where and she to tired lets go to in and out so I'm like @&$? It wherever you wanna eat at this point I just wanted to take her wherever she was gonna go and take my clothes off all I could think of if she had somebody extra in her life. I caught her hanging with somebody before years ago. EVERYTIME I see that guy I go in rage I chase him across town he calls the police helicopters come he escapes and I'm lectured by the police for a hour. I don't know I might take this thing called isolation a level higher and leave everybody buy me a house and live the single life I want more in a relationship than a room mate. So now I'm hungry didn't go get nothing to eat my heart is going a million miles a hour. Oooooooh well that's all folks I'm done how long can I be the nice guy Edited by 82airborne
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Today was my Wife's Birthday, Valentines, and our 10 year wedding anniversary. She spent the day working, and I spent the day at VA, doing 6 C&P exams for current FDC increase. We decided to go on Sunday, when the crowds are smaller. We were separated twice while I was in the Navy, Once due to being gone too much on Deployments, 5 years straight in OIF/OEF, and once when I spent 3 months in a Mental Hospital for PTSD. We are still together and I love her, and more attracted to her then when we first me years ago. I am very fortunate to have a Wonderful wife and 2 daughters. It is not always easy, and she has developed a lot of hate towards the Govt. Not a perfect life, but I would not trade it for the world. God bless to all of you, and wish you the best.

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Today was my Wife's Birthday, Valentines, and our 10 year wedding anniversary. She spent the day working, and I spent the day at VA, doing 6 C&P exams for current FDC increase. We decided to go on Sunday, when the crowds are smaller. We were separated twice while I was in the Navy, Once due to being gone too much on Deployments, 5 years straight in OIF/OEF, and once when I spent 3 months in a Mental Hospital for PTSD. We are still together and I love her, and more attracted to her then when we first me years ago. I am very fortunate to have a Wonderful wife and 2 daughters. It is not always easy, and she has developed a lot of hate towards the Govt. Not a perfect life, but I would not trade it for the world. God bless to all of you, and wish you the best.

Thanx :-)

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