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I'm Not Worthy

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coastie72

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I turned 64 a few weeks ago, after over 40 years I finally gave in and asked for help with my hearing loss and tinnitus. I was awarded 10% SC for tinnitus and 0% for hearing.

I always had both conditions since leaving the USCG in 1972. Neither was as bad as it is now, especially the tinnitus which is really bad.

I always felt I was undeserving when I look around at what other vets have gone through.

A few weeks ago I contacted the vet crisis line and just unloading all that was pent up inside of me. I had mentioned how depressing and aggravating the tinnitus was to my DAV VSO. I also mentioned thoughts of suicide and recurring nightmares. At that time he suggested we do a claim secondary to tinnitus for depression. My personal Dr. gave me a nexus. My VSO didn't realize like most people how messed up I really am so that was the way we were going.

I spent over two hours chatting and on the phone with the Crisis Line people on Oct. 11th. The lady was very nice and after answering a zillion questions and insuring me I could get help she said that my dreams that also just pop up during the daytime hours are stressors and that I most likely have PTSD along with other issues. My talk with her that day made me feel better and she very well might have saved my life.

She gave me a list of phone numbers to call including the local Vet Center. Today I needed to talk to someone again, so I called the vet center. I spoke with another nice lady that listened to my story and she too said, likely PTSD..........I did not every know until a few months ago that you could have PTSD without combat.

So as we spoke and she calmed me down, I asked her if they had after hours counseling or groups ET. She said yes we do, but ONLY for combat veterans..... That took me back to square one for this day.

I see the VA MH next week, and then I go from there..........I'm beginning to believe what I always thought.... I am not worthy!!!!! I wish I had never started this process! God Help me!

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  • HadIt.com Elder

coastie,

I get my records in the basement of the VAMC I go to,...just ask information desk where the Records Office is....go there and if you only want the records from your last exams Just tell them to go back to those dates, other wise you may get years of your records..you sign for them there free...sometimes they may tell you they will send them to you in the mail but you can request you really need them while your there they can print them out.

& Coastie 72 that's evidence carlie has mention...you also may want to get IMO...a Diagnosis from a Dr is basicly evidence! and of course to help you cope with health problems your having...its just that you need to say these problems was from your service days & got worse or ask a Dr to say its likely to as not that your disability's are from your years in service...they truly can't say its the very cause but they can word it ''likely to as not'' or something along those lines....not sure the VA docs will help you on that but an IMO Doc will...a good understanding Dr will.

Edited by britton
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I understand why they only rate it a 10%, because they can't hear it.

Actually - per the criteria in the schedule - IF they COULD hear it -

then it would be Objective Tinnitus, which is non compensable -

versus Subjective Tinnitus, which when Recurrent can garner the SC at 10 % evaluation.

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  • HadIt.com Elder

Just Vet to Vet here!

My reason I want them to increase tinnitus...some veterans are not hard of hearing but have tinnitus and it gets to where it effects the hearing

& other mental disability's like coastie 72...usually a if a vet gets a hearing test from the VA if the test warrants the hearing is ok or not bad enough to warrant comp but can still get it SC (that don't make a lick of sense to me?).. & the vet tells them about ringing in the ears its sluffed off and the vet gives up...I've witness that to happen...I suppose if the vet ever got hard of hearing the service connection would help. but when the vet gets turn down they usually never go back..I understand why simply because to me a vet can be hard of hearing and it not show with the test or the vet has a hard time with word discrimination.

we don't live in a bubble world!

In my opinion if someone has tinnitus then that's a hearing disorder and 10% is not enough comp for the vet especially if he can produce evidence he got it while in the service...having servere tinnitus is getting to be a problem for vets that can't even get the 10%..if they get it then like someone mention they can file a secondary claim for depression & maybe that's what coastie 72 needs to do?

just saying...Vet to Vet!

Edited by britton
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  • Content Curator/HadIt.com Elder

Britton hit the target here. I have been told I have dog ears, like Radar, on M.A.S.H., so I don't have hearing loss -- but tinnitus is daunting by itself.

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  • HadIt.com Elder

If the VA can't see it you likely get a low ball rating. Better to lose an arm or leg than to have some invisible disability that ruins your life and deal with the VA. Losing a leg or arm in no joke, but at least they don't call you a liar it you can prove it happened in a combat zone. Even that is not always easy. We need many more vet centers. There is only one within 10 miles of me. I could use group therapy and the VA is way too far for this to be useful to me. I got the VA to provide dental and vision in the community so maybe I can get the to provide group therapy close to my house.

John

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In my case I am not sure which condition I have really is the worse............ From my original post;

"

A few weeks ago I contacted the vet crisis line and just unloading all that was pent up inside of me. I had mentioned how depressing and aggravating the tinnitus was to my DAV VSO. I also mentioned thoughts of suicide and recurring nightmares. At that time he suggested we do a claim secondary to tinnitus for depression. My personal Dr. gave me a nexus. My VSO didn't realize like most people how messed up I really am so that was the way we were going.

I spent over two hours chatting and on the phone with the Crisis Line people on Oct. 11th. The lady was very nice and after answering a zillion questions and insuring me I could get help she said that my dreams that also just pop up during the daytime hours are stressors and that I most likely have PTSD along with other issues. My talk with her that day made me feel better and she very well might have saved my life."

I have had both conditions since the 70's.....both have gotten somewhat worse through the years, but for the last 7-10 years the tinnitus has invaded my life to the point that it is never not noticed.

To me, if I had a choice of one of them being completely erased, it without doubt would be the tinnitus!

I understand what john999 meant when he said " Better to lose an arm or leg than to have some invisible disability that ruins your life and deal with the VA"

In the 1970's money, I was trusted at the helm of million dollar boat! but no one but me will ever hear what is inside my head 24-7.

I don't know what will happen with me. They can talk to me, medicate me counsel me and maybe help with my recurrent dream problems. They can do nothing for the tinnitus.

Messed up situation. As Waylon Jennings said; " Ain't living long like this!

coastie72

Edited by coastie72
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