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ptsd New to the process
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mrthing2000
Hello all.
I am new to the disability comp process, and I'll be the first to admit--it sort of freaks me out. There is a lot of complexity to it, and I consider myself fairly learned and understanding of science and causation. Years ago I interned at the local VA hospital, and my dad retired from 20+ years in the VA civil service. Its a bit different walking in the door as a patient.
Okay, I had a book practically written below, but I'll keep it short:
Had an uneventful year in the Air Guard, then ran into some older guys who basically hazed me. I was about 3 paygrades lower, and 20 years younger. It was awful
I said screw that, these people are jerks, and I transferred into the Navy Reserve. Had 2 good years there. Enjoyed it thoroughly.
Graduated college, moved across country. Wasn't enthusisatic about the hassle of drill weekends. Wasn't making anything as an E-4. Prospective employers were always wary 'so you can get called up', and 'oh, so when do you get out.' I realized I needed to cut ties. I was out of college. Did what I came to do. See ya.
9/11 happened and I was nearly recalled to Active Duty. But I lucked out, stayed in my civil service job, and was transferred to the IRR per my request. I kept up pooints for good years in the IRR, but had no real intention of going back.
Had a change of heart, and economics were getting tight. Re-enlisted and went back to the drilling reserve. Found a loophole in my previous contract, and intentionally took a demotion to change career fields. Muhahaha. Then advanced first cycle each time. A year later, was an E-5. Took all the extra orders I could. Did pretty well. Spent a year on and off active duty orders in the reserve. Job market sucked and I liked traveling to new places. New York City was a highlight. Went twice.
But wife got into nursing school. We'd have to move. You go where you have to. And she was busy as hell. Loans were piling up. I figured--take a deployment. In the meantime, I volunteered to go to New Orleans to help with Hurricane Katrina relief efforts. And en route, got hammered by Hurricane Rita there (anybody remember that?).
A few months later, got the magic phone call. Deploy now if I wanted, but not with my unit. Or not. But I knew I would probably get yanked to go to Iraq with the Seabees (now I was one), Korea with the Coastal Warfare unit I was now in, or maybe not get yanked for a year. But eventually I would.
Economics rule. I opted for NOW. But the catch was--it was with the ARMY. And it was a year-long. And it was Afghanistan.
The deployment sucked--why would you expect different? I enjoyed a lot of it. But the issues I felt during Katrina got intense. The isolation from the real world sucked. I was fighting the 'just war'. But we didn't do much anything most of the time. We were ON the front lines. Basically not doing anything all day. I was trained for all this combat stuff, and was stuck all day on the tiny FOB. And if you don't engage the enemy, they come to you. First night of tower guard, gunfire. Turns out if was a runaway 50cal on a Humvee. Tracers into the sky. An accident. And accidents, more than anything else, were to mar the deployment over and over.
In short:
Post deployment:
Overall, its been a real struggle. Survivors guilt, being abused by some peers and superiors, some issues from PTSD, and a propensity to want to talk about things, but nobody wants to hear your story. No one. Everyone wants to believe the Afghan campaign was the 'right war'. And they don't want to know we tried but basically failed.
There were no war heros in my FOB. One purple heart. A LOT of close calls. And tons of accidents. Tons.
It took me almost 10 years to finally march myself into the VA and say 'finally, let's do this'. I have pain, nightmares, anxiety attacks, and I've not tackled them. I go to the VA and feel out of place--30 years younger than everyone else there. And 'I'm not as bad as that guy' feeling. And especially thinking someday about re-enlisting, and not wanting a foot of paper to need a waiver for everything.
But then I realized, its very unlikely I would re-enlist. And I was getting older. I had the time. Let's roll.
I am wary of the VA, just as I was wary of the medical departments all along. There is so much missing in my service records. Our unit corpsman didn't write anything down. It will be a struggle to argue service connectivity for many things, being that its been 9 years since I came 'home'. It sucks. I remember times/dates/places vividly. That may not matter.
But its a fight many of you know all too well. I have questions. Many. And truly, thank you for your service.
We weren't all patriots. Some needed money for college, others to feed their families. And many drafted without a choice. Most old, and a few young ones. But we are all veterans.
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Vync
Welcome to Hadit! To become service connected (SC) for a disability, for the most part, you'll need: 1. Event/Issue in service 2. Current diagnosis 3. Doctor connecting 1 and 2
Buck52
You should read some of Navy4life post she had feet/Ankle problems and got S.C. for both one aggravated the other so-to -speak, Interesting as how she got it Service connected and rated for..s
Buck52
Great Information from Vync!
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