Va disability & C&P question regarding veteran with suicide risk

[Lagin02]

So my husband is going though the VA disability process. He began treatment in April doing CPT which aggravated his symptoms immensely. In May, he was fired from the job he has held for 8 years. In June, he was put on disability leave from his National Guard unit after command became aware of his suicide risk and they have mandated that he continues the therapy which is only making the situation worse. He has been in for 15 years and most likely will be medically chaptered out which has worsened his depression significantly. Due to his suicidal thoughts I am trying to manage this financial crisis as best I can because I’m afraid he is being pushed over the edge. He just stares off into space and sits in our basement. I filed for VA disability at the beginning of June because prior to all this he was our only source of income. I left my job a couple months before he was fired because my income was not enough to cover daycare after our son was born. I can’t leave him alone with the kids in the state he is in right now. I payed off our bills for a couple months with our savings but we only have a month left before we will be homeless. I also expedited his claim due to financial hardship in June. His claim seems open and shut to me. He did is C&P exam in July 31st but the VA still haven’t received the report (it was a VA doctor that did it not a contractor).  I called on Thursday to ask where it is and was told “it’s not ready yet” by the office where it was conducted. 

My understanding is you must prove three things:

The stressor:

His stressor occurred in Iraq in 2007. There was a CID investigation due to the circumstances around the event and there are still people in his unit that were in Iraq with him and knew what happened. I don’t want to write details because it would defeat the purpose of confidentiality but there is no denying that it was extremely traumatic and involved death and serious injury of service members in a small convoy. I also have a memorandum signed by the commander sending my husband to the combat stress unit in Iraq after the incident when he became suicidal. In my mind there is no denying the stressor. 

A current diagnosis: 

He is currently under treatment for PTSD at the VA doing CPT and is on medication. His team wants him to do an in-patient program in Chicago but as it stands with our impending homelessness, it just isn’t an opinion right now. 

The Nexus: 

He marked off symptoms of ptsd on his demobilization paperwork and stated he encountered stressors. In his periodic health assessment 6-month and also 1 year follow-ups for his Iraq deployment it shows he endorsed every symptom of PTSD and one Depression question. He was supposed to be referred to mental health according to this form but for whatever reason it slipped through the cracks. His current treatment is focused on the events that occurred during his first deployment. 

I called the VA homeless assistance line and was told that they will place my husband in transitional housing but me and our children (6-month-old and 9-years-old) will need to “find somewhere else to go.” I called the White House VA line and was told “I am so sorry but I don’t know what else I can tell you to do” His ebenifits portal broke 6 weeks ago due to duplicate files and was supposed to be fixed 3 weeks ago but is still broken. I have called veteran resources but all in our area require we have a “resolution” if they assist which we don’t because I don’t know if or when he will start to improve. 

So if your still with me, I have a couple questions: 

How long does it take for the doctor to send a C&P exam? Is it normal that it wouldn’t be don’t weeks after the exam? 

What are the chances that this will be resolved before the end of September when we will be homeless? If we do become homeless how do we follow up with the case with no address? 

Will the transitional housing be able to make sure he doesn’t follow through with his suicidal thoughts? I’m afraid that separating our family and having to toss everything we have build over the last 10 years will push him over the edge and I won’t be there to make sure he is okay. 

Is there anything else I can or should be doing? 

Is there any chance he could get better soon? Like it gets really bad but than starts then better? He has a bachelor’s degree and if he stops staring off into space and having these episodes he could get a job paying good money or I can work and he can watch the kids. I can’t imagine throwing everything we own in a dumpster, having my family torn apart, and taking my kids to a homeless shelter. I don’t even know how to explain it to my 9-year-old. He always struggled but at least he was functioning by numbing everything and isolation prior to opening this can of worms. We were financially comfortable so I just don’t understand how things got so bad so fast.

[Lagin02]

9 hours ago, GBArmy said:

 

I also am very happy for you. You did good; you asked the questions, went back and worked the advise, came back with new challenges, did it again and again. You purservered. Wonderful. You got a lot of GREAT advise, so many of us were in the background; we could see they were offering the support and advise you needed so we let them roll. Keep us advised of what's going on and your next battle. There will be a "next battle", but you have proved to yourself that you are up to it. Congrats!

 

I am so sorry, I forgot to include you in my list of people to thank!! So many people came forward to help and I really appreciate each and every one of you!!! Thank you so much! I will most definitely keep everyone in the loop as we move forward. You are all absolutely amazing! 

[Lagin02]

5 hours ago, Berta said:

This is Wonderful News!  Your husband could also  be eligible for SSDI ( SSA benefits for disabled).

Any evidence from VA that he is unemployable due to his service (such as a TDIU award) will help ,if he is considered  100% disabled under SSDI. He can receive SSDi and VA compensation at the same time.

The relief in your post is obvious and I am so proud of all the help you got here from so many.

God is Good too and I know he heard our prayers!

I also am glad that the VA did the right thing. We have vets here who have lost everything -waiting for a VA decision that they were fully deserving of. Vets have  even died durng  the long claims process.

You are a very proactive wife and support system for your husband and I commend you!

I thank everyone here who helped you-too- they did a great job!

 

 

Thank you Berta!i appreciate all the prayers and support. As grateful as I am for the senators intervention, I am so angry that it took this much to get him the benefits he was entitled to so he could get the help he needs. How many veterans do not have someone to fight for them and are instead left to the mercy of a heartless agency like the VA? Especially those suffering from mental health conditions which can impede their ability to advocate for themselves? It’s not okay!  Our veterans deserve better!!!! 

[Lagin02]

2 hours ago, GeekySquid said:

Having her Senator call the VA didn't hurt in fact Ebennies reported that despite being flagged as homeless or near to be homeless the decision would not happen until Jan 2020, that is what 5 months? I don't consider that faster though it is better than 5 years out.

I got some clarity on this. Apparently even though it was flagged, they didn’t prioritize it as high as they should have. My understanding is that the VSO never turned in the paperwork for the children so even though the expedition request stated his children would be homeless and there was no resources for them, the information the VA had stated he didn’t have any dependents. Also, the VSO never turned in the memorandum that stated he was sent to combat stress in Iraq so they had to pull records of the incident which extended the time it took to make a decision. 

[GeekySquid]

12 minutes ago, Lagin02 said:

What should I be watching out for? 

with his therapist or in general?

 Watch that his therapist is actually documenting the disassociation events. They must be documented and that word or a medical synonym must be used.

as for watching him

record events of disassociation. Record outburts. Record your own actions to "prevent" outburts, the situations like the kids being noisy and yo telling them to not be because it irritates dad. Stuff like that.

Record if he wanders away. If he is late, what he forgets to do. Does he bathe. Does he make random comments that seem related to conversations in his head.

Record what is happening when those things occur...is there a trigger? some commonality to when or what precedes the different events.

Did you snap at him? did you make Hummus? did a dog bark? anything can trigger an event and they are veteran experience specific.

record increases and decreases in number of events. There could be a seasonal cycle in there someplace.

Sounds daunting right?

it is and there is no help for that.

19 minutes ago, Lagin02 said:

Hector was portrayed as the ideal solider, son, and father.

Hector was also known for being a nag to those around him. usually from an "i know better than you" point of view..that is not so flattering to me but it is the point I was laughing about.

20 minutes ago, Lagin02 said:

’m more of a reader than a writer. 

Get busy learning to write! I now kinda want a Cranky Grandpa Squid character created because of me. HAHAHAHA

22 minutes ago, Lagin02 said:

I’m definitely going to look into this

Please do.

22 minutes ago, Lagin02 said:

realized I should have gone to law school

Check into this, but he should be able to transfer his GI bill to you. This benefit has changed and has many different rules, but it could send you to law school.

I don't want to sound mean, but it will be years before he might be able to use his GI Bill benefits, if ever. Don't let them go to waste. If you become a lawyer you can afford to send him to school if and when he gets well enough to attend.

This also goes back to being 100% Schedular and P&T. Your kids can get college benefits. I know they are young now, but paying for two college kids is expensive as crud. Plan for the future.

26 minutes ago, Lagin02 said:

Ultimately I referred them to the same resources I tried to use with no result. I hate that I was part of that frustrating cycle for so many of my clients.  I guess I had to experience it myself to understand. 

I am sorry you had to experience from the client side.

 

[GeekySquid]

15 minutes ago, Lagin02 said:

I got some clarity on this. Apparently even though it was flagged, they didn’t prioritize it as high as they should have. My understanding is that the VSO never turned in the paperwork for the children so even though the expedition request stated his children would be homeless and there was no resources for them, the information the VA had stated he didn’t have any dependents. Also, the VSO never turned in the memorandum that stated he was sent to combat stress in Iraq so they had to pull records of the incident which extended the time it took to make a decision. 

and part of you thought I was being hyperbolic and over the top when I told you to have a tantrum on camera and call out your senator if they did not jump into the fray to help you.

This is WHY!!!!!! The va says lots of stuff, it is their actions that screw us over !!!!!!!

[GeekySquid]

22 minutes ago, Lagin02 said:

As grateful as I am for the senators intervention, I am so angry that it took this much to get him the benefits he was entitled to so he could get the help he needs.

That is a good way to feel and for you to remember HOW TO FEEL in the future.

There is an old saying, What have you done for me lately? and keeping that feeling will help keep you focused on keeping that Senator on your side and the leadership at the VARO and VAMC ready to jump when you snap your fingers.

24 minutes ago, Lagin02 said:

How many veterans do not have someone to fight for them and are instead left to the mercy of a heartless agency like the VA?

90% of veterans fall into the category. Connected Vets (mom or dad is a politician, lawyer, rich, etc) are treated differently because they have the resources,

Now you have one too. Use it for your advantage!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

25 minutes ago, Lagin02 said:

Especially those suffering from mental health conditions which can impede their ability to advocate for themselves?

preach sister preach! this should be a come to jesus moment for you and your future path into your own families advocacy as well as helping other veterans and their families.

 

26 minutes ago, Lagin02 said:

It’s not okay!  Our veterans deserve better!!!! 

you are right and no we don't. Our families don't deserve it either.