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Dependent Apportionment



2 months ago the VA awarded a dependent apportionment claim that I’d previously filed in 2017 for my daughter. The VA then told her Father(in prison for aggravated assault of his last girlfriend and child) the details of the claim and he has begun to call and write angry letters to me weekly telling me I’m a bad parent, demanding proof of what I’m spending the benefit money on, and telling me I need to respect him because he made the decision to choose to give me the apportionment for our daughter and if I can’t show him what I’m doing with the money he will appoint someone to be in charge of it. This all stemmed from him immediately calling to request a large sum of money from the award and me deciding to put it in an account for our daughter to save. Besides feeling harassed, I’m confused about the entire thing. I filed the apportionment application. The VA made the decision to ensure he was financially contributing to raising our daughter(of which he has only contributed less than 2 year of her 15 years  alive). Was it his choice to allow the VA to send a monthly benefit payment and can he end that simply because 1)I did not send him the large sum of money he requested and 2) because I’m not giving him proof of what is done with the money? 
Being harassed by this person From prison who spent years physically abusing me is causing extra stress that I’d like to end, but not sure my options and I feel our daughter’s needs deserve to be contributed towards by him.
thank you for any words of wisdom on this. I truly appreciate it.  

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It sounds like he is trying to abuse you all over again.

Don't become his victim.

I suggest not even answering his calls-do you have to agree to pay for the call when he calls from the prison?

A neighbor was getting collect calls from his niece and her boyfriend, both in prison, to try to get the stimulus payment, and both wanted the extra cash for their child ( who they relinquished custody on) but the neighbor started to refuse or simply not answer any calls from the prisons. They had tried to get him to do other things,as well that he would not do.

He is a disabled veteran and did a lot for his niece before she turned to drugs.The boyfriend got out early on one charge-this is New York state- but was arrested again within 2 weeks for  trying to sell drugs again.Now he is a jail 25 miles from my neighbor and hopefully he will go back to prison again.

I am surprised ,in your situation,  that the letters to you do not seem to be censored by the prison, because they sound very threatening.

I think he could have filed a disagreement with the VA apportionment- but if so ( I will try to find more on that)

his formal disagreement failed.

It is disgraceful that he has been so unwilling to support his child, and he will abuse someone  again, if he ever gets out of jail.

You didn't mention his VA disability. If it is PTSD, that is NO excuse for his behavior.

Does the prison have advocates for family members? Maybe there is some way the prison can  stop his contact with you.


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I would call the warden and complain and let them know he is harassing you and file charges. Yes, charges can be pressed on him while in prison. Then, contact an attorney and see about a law suit against the prison and system for allowing an abuser to contact an abusee. Also, call the white house 800 number and let them know the VA is violating your rights by contacting someone other than you with info on your case. I have children  that i raised not the dad, and collected the dependency for them without them contacting the father. Your rights were violated. Do not answer any more calls, and save any and all vm.

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