Good evening, ladies and gentlemen!
I went in for a recent evaluation at the VA Hospital, and I'm not sure why...but my first thought going in was "I'm tired of pretending I'm fine, that I'm not broken. I'm tired of being angry, upset, crying, and the constant dreams reminding me of my lost brothers. I really miss being able to sit in a goddamned restaurant and simply enjoying my mean, without having an exit plan, looking for suspicious people, and having constant visibility of all choke-points and the main entrance." This train of thought continued on, going through the last 9 years of my life and realizing how much I've been burying my past and real emotions. Anyway, I went through the appointment and just let it all go. I was scared shitless, that they'd pack me away in a padded room...but then realized, maybe that was best. After all of this, the nurse tells me after answering the stack of questions he had for me that I tested positive for PTSD, on top of my severe anxiety/depression disorder. I've had a service-connected disability rating of 80% since 2009, and the thought of applying for an increased rating puts my stomach in knots! I'm scheduled for a few different appointments, all of which are regards to mental health, but if I'm going to push this claim through....I need help.
Thank you in advance!
Bill