Can Someone Help Keep Me On Track?

[Guest morgan]

I have come to Hadit this time with a broken heart. My kind and sweet husband of 27 years died last Friday. He was rated at SMC M and was enrolled in the VA Home Based Primary Care program. He had a visit with the VA nurse on Thursday, a week before his death. She found a 101.7 fever but didn't follow up with us about it. He had had recurrent UTIs and had been on three rounds of antibiotics, so I assumed the fever was related to the UTI. The third round of antibiotic was to end the next day after the nurse visit. When I didn't hear back from the nurse, I thought the UA must have been clear. But he was still very weak and sick. I took him to a private doctor and he sent him to the hospital. We found out that he had pneumonia so advanced, on top of severe lung disease, and he just couldn't fight it off. I am devastated. I know I need to file a claim for DIC, but I just can't get my head together to find the application or know what else I need. Or how much DIC pays now. Anything anyone might remind me of, I would greatly appreciate, as I have been at home taking care of him and can't seem to think outside the caregiver box. I'm sure my good sense will come back soon, but I just can't think right now. All of our income is gone, of course, and since he was so sick, he had little life insurance.

Any help to keep me on track would be greatly appreciated. I'm just not used to not being able to think. I'm trying to find a job, too, but as crazy as I am right now, I'm sure no one would hire me. I just have to settle my heart and mind. I would appreciate your prayers.

Edited December 26, 2008 by morgan

[Berta]

What terrible news Morgan-

I know how overwhelming and dehabilitating grief like this can be.

I sure will pray for you and am saddened by the loss of this veteran.

The basic DIC rate just went up to 1154 a month but this chart will give you the rates for other additional DIC comp you could be eligible for or perhaps any dpendent children would be:

http://www.vba.va.gov/bln/21/Rates/comp03.htm

How long was your husband rated 100% P & T SC?

If ten years or more , this would provide you with DIC under Sec 1318 entitlement and you would not have to prove direct SC death.

Of course when I read this post I saw that there could have potentially been VA malpractice.

"We found out that he had pneumonia so advanced, on top of severe lung disease, and he just couldn't fight it off"

If this is a documented fact in the private hospital medical records,and the VA failed to take proper medical steps regarding either the pneumonia or the lung disease (and if these were listed on the death certificate) that looks to me like VA medical care could have caused or contributed to his death.

Still- it is the medical records themselves that would reveal if that happened.

Was an autopsy done?

Did he have a good service officer or rep that you would consider contacting?

The Death Certificate- you might need many raised seal copies of this.There were about 10 bucks eacj when my husband died but that surely went up.

Also- if the medical records reveal potential VA malpractice, you could file both a Section 1151 and also a FTCA tort.

If he died intestate (without a will) that could impact on any DIC offset if the FTCA is successful.

I feel a little uncomfortable with what I have posted here-

it seems to soon to even consider FTCA and all that-but I certainly feel from your post that something might have gone wrong in his care.

The first thing and the best thing you can do is to handle your grief and even the VA itself could possibly provide some counseling to help with that.

Even though I live in rural locale we have local widows and widowers groups that could help you too if there are some in your area.

Being a caretaker myself-it was such a shock that this all vanished when my husband died.I made him a cup of coffee every morning for weeks out of habit after he died and cooked like he was still here for months.

One thing that helped me was to go over all of his photos and all of the miliary paraphenalia he had collected.I even played the music he loved that had not been my type of music at all-and I realised why he was a Led Zepplin and Janis Joplin fan which I rapidly became when I listened to their work and the words carefully for songs they had written.

Rod gave me something that was to become a gift beyond all I imagined-

that gift was Vietnam-

the most important thing to me -still-on a daily basis next to my daughter.Vietnam.

She herself was a Vietnamese linquist for the Mil for 7 years after he died and went there twice.His profound gift of the meaning of the Vietnam War sure affected us both deeply and we will always honor his service.But I didnt understand the meaning until a few years ago.

Hold on to that-your husband's military service and sacrifice-I have lost 2 disabled vet husbands and I feel their military service somehow eased my grief .

Disabled veterans (this isnt politically correct but I sort of dont care)

are -in my opinion- a BIG cut above everyone else-

Men and women who serve or who have served should be honored by far more than they are.Here at Hadit we see disabled men and women who are still serving others-with their support and advice.

That fact overwhelmes me when I see so many non disabled citizens who do not think of others and even are unconcerned with the vast problems that disabled veterans have today.

Your husband's death had a meaning- I believe no vet dies in vain.The meaning might not be realised for quite some time but in time you will overcome this grief and be able to find a balance in a life without him physically but with his spirit always with you.

It will give you the strength to pursue a DIC claim and to get on with your life.He would want you to do that.

I know that is easy for me to say- because when Rod died- almost my whole life had revolved around him due to his disabilities.

Within a few months I remembered what a psychologist friend of mine had said-during a school lecture where I met him-

he said when we feel like we have nothing left inside us emotionally -that is when we must start to gibve away what we dont have.

He was a East Indian and based this on Gandhi's work-

But I truly emply inside -there was nothing there to give-

I became so numb I didnt even know oif I was even feeling grief anymore.

(The VA shrink said this was a normal feeling to have)

and then a neighbor asked to go to the local volunteer fire department open house breakfast.

I joined the fire department that day when I realised that most of the firemen were vets-and some were in active reserves.

I began through this volunteer work to give away what I thought I didnt have.This might not be a solution for you at all.But it helped me so much.I was doing something that got me away from the farm and that prevented me from dwelling too much on my grief.

Surely if you find a job you like it will have the same effect-

even though your heart might not be in it for quite some time.

Has your husband been buried yet?If not and you want him buried in a VA cemetery- make sure that the American Legion is informed ahead of time for a military funeral.

This is devastating news you gave us and

we cannot change death but do come to terms to accept it.

I will pray for you. Prayers certainly can bring comfort.

[mags1023]

I have come to Hadit this time with a broken heart. My kind and sweet husband of 27 years died last Friday. He was rated at SMC M and was enrolled in the VA Home Based Primary Care program. He had a visit with the VA nurse on Thursday, a week before his death. She found a 101.7 fever but didn't follow up with us about it. He had had recurrent UTIs and had been on three rounds of antibiotics, so I assumed the fever was related to the UTI. The third round of antibiotic was to end the next day after the nurse visit. When I didn't hear back from the nurse, I thought the UA must have been clear. But he was still very weak and sick. I took him to a private doctor and he sent him to the hospital. We found out that he had pneumonia so advanced, on top of severe lung disease, and he just couldn't fight it off. I am devastated. I know I need to file a claim for DIC, but I just can't get my head together to find the application or know what else I need. Or how much DIC pays now. Anything anyone might remind me of, I would greatly appreciate, as I have been at home taking care of him and can't seem to think outside the caregiver box. I'm sure my good sense will come back soon, but I just can't think right now. All of our income is gone, of course, and since he was so sick, he had little life insurance.

Any help to keep me on track would be greatly appreciated. I'm just not used to not being able to think. I'm trying to find a job, too, but as crazy as I am right now, I'm sure no one would hire me. I just have to settle my heart and mind. I would appreciate your prayers.

Morgan,

I am so sorry to hear of your loss and, through personal experience, I know this time of year makes it even more difficult. Do you have a support network other than Hadit?? Family/friends?? They may not know the VA system at all, but you can direct them to the VA website and they may be able to help you. If you know of a VSO in your area, maybe one that you worked with in the past, that person might also be of help. Have you had the funeral yet?? If you call the VFW or American Legion or any military organization to give him a military ceremony, you could also receive counseling from them on what to do. I would think Berta would be the best to help with this. If you can go back and edit your post title and include "BERTA help" in it, she will definitely see it. Especially the medical care concerns you might have. I know you need time to grieve, but valuable facts may be lost if you don't get them documented now.

This is a recommendation for all at Hadit. I have a folder on the desktop of my computer and a paper file titled "in case of my death". It has all of the information/steps my wife would need to follow if I did pass before I could instruct her on what to do. It has my will, insurance info, VA info including the number to local American Legion for her to call for a military funeral and most importantly a list of my VA connected disabilities and it tells her to have an autopsy and to have the coroner identify in their report if my death could have been caused by one of these conditions I had. Again, the phrase "at least as likely as not" or "more likely than not" contributed to the death of .............. I think that the nexus is most important for DIC. Morgan, maybe you can have the doctor go back and document this for your husband's death in case he hasn't already done so.

I hope this isn't too much overload for you at this time. Just know you are in our thoughts and prayers. Mags

[mags1023]

What terrible news Morgan-

I know how overwhelming and dehabilitating grief like this can be.

I sure will pray for you and am saddened by the loss of this veteran.

The basic DIC rate just went up to 1154 a month but this chart will give you the rates for other additional DIC comp you could be eligible for or perhaps any dpendent children would be:

http://www.vba.va.gov/bln/21/Rates/comp03.htm

How long was your husband rated 100% P & T SC?

If ten years or more , this would provide you with DIC under Sec 1318 entitlement and you would not have to prove direct SC death.

Of course when I read this post I saw that there could have potentially been VA malpractice.

"We found out that he had pneumonia so advanced, on top of severe lung disease, and he just couldn't fight it off"

If this is a documented fact in the private hospital medical records,and the VA failed to take proper medical steps regarding either the pneumonia or the lung disease (and if these were listed on the death certificate) that looks to me like VA medical care could have caused or contributed to his death.

Still- it is the medical records themselves that would reveal if that happened.

Was an autopsy done?

Did he have a good service officer or rep that you would consider contacting?

The Death Certificate- you might need many raised seal copies of this.There were about 10 bucks eacj when my husband died but that surely went up.

Also- if the medical records reveal potential VA malpractice, you could file both a Section 1151 and also a FTCA tort.

If he died intestate (without a will) that could impact on any DIC offset if the FTCA is successful.

I feel a little uncomfortable with what I have posted here-

it seems to soon to even consider FTCA and all that-but I certainly feel from your post that something might have gone wrong in his care.

The first thing and the best thing you can do is to handle your grief and even the VA itself could possibly provide some counseling to help with that.

Even though I live in rural locale we have local widows and widowers groups that could help you too if there are some in your area.

Being a caretaker myself-it was such a shock that this all vanished when my husband died.I made him a cup of coffee every morning for weeks out of habit after he died and cooked like he was still here for months.

One thing that helped me was to go over all of his photos and all of the miliary paraphenalia he had collected.I even played the music he loved that had not been my type of music at all-and I realised why he was a Led Zepplin and Janis Joplin fan which I rapidly became when I listened to their work and the words carefully for songs they had written.

Rod gave me something that was to become a gift beyond all I imagined-

that gift was Vietnam-

the most important thing to me -still-on a daily basis next to my daughter.Vietnam.

She herself was a Vietnamese linquist for the Mil for 7 years after he died and went there twice.His profound gift of the meaning of the Vietnam War sure affected us both deeply and we will always honor his service.But I didnt understand the meaning until a few years ago.

Hold on to that-your husband's military service and sacrifice-I have lost 2 disabled vet husbands and I feel their military service somehow eased my grief .

Disabled veterans (this isnt politically correct but I sort of dont care)

are -in my opinion- a BIG cut above everyone else-

Men and women who serve or who have served should be honored by far more than they are.Here at Hadit we see disabled men and women who are still serving others-with their support and advice.

That fact overwhelmes me when I see so many non disabled citizens who do not think of others and even are unconcerned with the vast problems that disabled veterans have today.

Your husband's death had a meaning- I believe no vet dies in vain.The meaning might not be realised for quite some time but in time you will overcome this grief and be able to find a balance in a life without him physically but with his spirit always with you.

It will give you the strength to pursue a DIC claim and to get on with your life.He would want you to do that.

I know that is easy for me to say- because when Rod died- almost my whole life had revolved around him due to his disabilities.

Within a few months I remembered what a psychologist friend of mine had said-during a school lecture where I met him-

he said when we feel like we have nothing left inside us emotionally -that is when we must start to gibve away what we dont have.

He was a East Indian and based this on Gandhi's work-

But I truly emply inside -there was nothing there to give-

I became so numb I didnt even know oif I was even feeling grief anymore.

(The VA shrink said this was a normal feeling to have)

and then a neighbor asked to go to the local volunteer fire department open house breakfast.

I joined the fire department that day when I realised that most of the firemen were vets-and some were in active reserves.

I began through this volunteer work to give away what I thought I didnt have.This might not be a solution for you at all.But it helped me so much.I was doing something that got me away from the farm and that prevented me from dwelling too much on my grief.

Surely if you find a job you like it will have the same effect-

even though your heart might not be in it for quite some time.

Has your husband been buried yet?If not and you want him buried in a VA cemetery- make sure that the American Legion is informed ahead of time for a military funeral.

This is devastating news you gave us and

we cannot change death but do come to terms to accept it.

I will pray for you. Prayers certainly can bring comfort.

Great! I see Berta answered this while I was writing my post.

[Berta]

I need to correct my post right way Morgan ------

the regulations involving malpractice and VA Nursing Homes are different then other FTCA regs-

in many cases VA Nursing Homes are exept somehow from these types of claims-

still he was a regular VA patient for quite some time-

and VA doctors -who were not Nursing home employees might well have contributed to his death-by steps taken by the actual VAMC before he went to the nursing home-

However- although this widow lost her case- this BVA decision shows that in spite of being treated in a VA Nursing Home- the FTCA claim was not denied on any legal criteria exempting the VA nursing home:

http://www.va.gov/vetapp03/files/0316371.txt

I know of a vet who filed FTCA for inapporprate VA nursing home care. His claim was denied by the OGC as not timely and there was no statement that the nursing home was excempt from the regular FTCA regs.

I regret that I just realised there could be exemptions for some types of VA Nursing home liability-

I dont know how that works.

I will find more information on that.

[Berta]

I might still have this wrong.

This decision shows what I mean- some nursing homes are not under the Secretary's Jurisdiction.

I would think a VA Nursing home would be.

http://www.va.gov/vetapp08/files2/0809862.txt

Also if any negligent care came from a VAMC employee at a VA Nursing Home I still believe this falls under their FTCA liability.

I need to find out more info and we dont know if there is any FTCA basis at all.

I do suggest that you obtain a service rep and get copies of every medical record he had from private hosp, docs, and the VA before preparing a DIC claim with a 21-526 form.

I did that to make sure that when I stated reopen of my husband;s 1151 claim- that I already had some of the evidence of malpractice that I found in Rod's VA med recs.

I also learned that VA writes FTCA and 1151 all over the C file for these types of claims and would probably stall on any records release unless the survivor got the med recs first before tipping them off to any negligence claims.

[mags1023]

I need to correct my post right way Morgan ------

the regulations involving malpractice and VA Nursing Homes are different then other FTCA regs-

in many cases VA Nursing Homes are exept somehow from these types of claims-

still he was a regular VA patient for quite some time-

and VA doctors -who were not Nursing home employees might well have contributed to his death-by steps taken by the actual VAMC before he went to the nursing home-

However- although this widow lost her case- this BVA decision shows that in spite of being treated in a VA Nursing Home- the FTCA claim was not denied on any legal criteria exempting the VA nursing home:

http://www.va.gov/vetapp03/files/0316371.txt

I know of a vet who filed FTCA for inapporprate VA nursing home care. His claim was denied by the OGC as not timely and there was no statement that the nursing home was excempt from the regular FTCA regs.

I regret that I just realised there could be exemptions for some types of VA Nursing home liability-

I dont know how that works.

I will find more information on that.

Morgan:

Your husband was living at home and had VA home care nurses come visit your home, correct?? If I read your post correctly, he was not living in a nursing home was he ?? Berta, would that make a difference? home care VA nurses vs. actually living in a nursing home. Just a thought.

s/Mags