maset22 Posted December 23, 2009 Share Posted December 23, 2009 As I sink in the cognitive processing therapy, I feel lousy, I can't stop, but the thought of remembering is upsetting at least. As anyone gotten better with this? Where am I headed? Just questions. Someone please feedback. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
maset22 Posted December 31, 2009 Author Share Posted December 31, 2009 Hey Free, First I like to say I love you Guy's And Gal's ( hope I am politically correct) the bottom line is there none like us. We went, we did it, and we came back home in some way or form. plus we have a special part for those that are in our boots now. And we remember our buddies. Thanks so much for the support. The preparation was more heavy than the actual session. the thought of remembering, and reading about the incident. admitting that you were scare Shir_less, to the point of thinking this is it. is not something that comes easy. the memory, feelings, thoughts, every details is mindbogglingly. Just like it's happening again, for me once I wrote it down on paper, I didn't relived it as I thought in mi mind. Now come another assignment. do it all over again. soon, with any second episode. Wings made a point, I have to consider, trusting is an issue for me. I really don't want what I put on paper comes back to bite me. paper trail is forever. coming back to the assignment, there are sticking points. I have to work out with the Doc. But I am glad to have hadit with me. Pease don't let me run in a paper work trap, while I honestly trying to get better. I am still medicating myself, I need to go back to lorazepam. so there it is so far. CPT, I am still angry, anxious, jumpy, can't sleep, and don't trust. Is it wort it. will let you know. I am glad for the Doc thou. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
maset22 Posted January 4, 2010 Author Share Posted January 4, 2010 Wings, Pigdriver, taking your advice. I have issues on trusting with good reason, But the Doc is requiring that documentation. specially on the re-wrte, are they looking for embellishments, exaggerations. I am straight with my recollection. Just finish my fourth and fifth assignments on paper, just need Doc to comment on those. I recall that somethings that are natural in combat in just business. mines might be business but nevertheless real to me. and as I read them in the Doc office it is easier, but once I get out that environment that heavy feelings is all over me. Is not until I get to my vehicle and have control I start to feel better. luckily I drive slow from been drain from the sessions. But I still have anger, anxiety, cant sleep, suspicions don't trust, and always on hedge, if they are not (old warriors and civilians that knows whats going on by they unique situations) don't sell me the B'rookyn Bridge. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
HadIt.com Elder Pete53 Posted January 4, 2010 HadIt.com Elder Share Posted January 4, 2010 Its good to trust your Doc but remember this they write everything down so be careful about being completely honest about your childhood and anything not connected to your service. You are not required to share everything. Some VA Docs try to make regular mental health problems into personality disorders and pre existing conditions.I am not trying to coach you just pointing out some of the traps. Think through your answers to how you got along with parents teachers and others when you were a kid.Not many kids grew up like Beaver Cleaver. Veterans deserve real choice for their health care. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
maset22 Posted January 5, 2010 Author Share Posted January 5, 2010 Thanks Pete, we haven't gone down those roads, we strictly for the moment stay in the sand box. Pete, just curios, Have you been to the Canal Zone, Panama. in the late sixties and early seventies thou. It yes was like beaver Cleaver. Not if you were in jungle training. Thanks for the info. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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maset22
As I sink in the cognitive processing therapy, I feel lousy, I can't stop, but the thought of remembering is upsetting at least. As anyone gotten better with this? Where am I headed? Just questions. Someone please feedback.
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