Wife of Retired Military - Husband Diagnosed with Alzheimers

[EODCMC]

Hi everyone. It has been quite some time since my last visit, regrettably. This site is eerily similar to my relationship with God. I seem to only call on him when I need help. Although, Theresa (Tbird) is the closest I’ve seen to an angel on earth.

I’m trying to help a friend of my wife. Only, to get her in the right direction to get professional help. Leony has been married to a retired military veteran for more than 40 years, still married, still loving and living together.

The retired veteran has had multiple operations recently including but not limited to the heart. He was recently diagnosed with Alzheimer’s. His symptoms were getting serious enough to over-ride his stubbornness resisting doctors. He has become recalcitrant, cantankerous, and paranoid recently. Aside from the hardship of caring for her husband (without complaint) she is growing desperate because her husband has growing lapses in providing his share of the household bills. This is worsening. When she asked him to allow her access to do this, he gets very defensive and blows up at her.  Although she still works and pays for the household food and some other things, the mortgage and utilities are on him and there have been some troubling letters from them. He has always been reclusive where the family finances are concerned but his mental health is worsening and she doesn’t know where to turn

He is 30 year military retired veteran. She doesn’t know if he ever applied for VA disability. She lives near a Naval base and a VA Regional. I don’t know if I should direct her toward the base legal office or the VA. If anyone has some advice I would surely pass it on.  

Again, thanks in advance and my deep regards to Theresa…you have helped so many.

Respectfully, Jim C

[EODCMC]

Thanks Bronc…sound advice. Thanks again Vync.