Hambone11B

I hate to admit this and definitely don't want to put an even further damper on your day but I won TDIU and SSA about a year ago and while I had fun with the money, I'm still left with days that consist of waking up (if I ever fall asleep) forcing myself to eat some sort of breakfast as I'm not motivated to even eat, I then sit at my window and wait for the mail that comes at 10am and after that I just sit there. I would trade all those benefits back if I could just go back to war and live again. Beer drinking was a fun hobby but I didn't enjoy it after the first month anymore. I am 32 and completely and utterly lost. Hell I even moved to California to try and fight my way into Stanford only to find out that I might be Bi-Polar and that it was just madness going on in my head. I would love to just get away and do something wild but even then I know I'd get to where I was going and sit there. Nothing replaces true combat and if God had any Mercy he'd let those that have seen it die over in some other country so at least the loved ones back home could remember them as heroes and not that Veteran uncle or cousin that sits around and does nothing all day. I'm not even sure why I'm posting all this but I've tried the guitar, I've video-gamed. I will say this, before World of Warcraft started to suck that actually gave me something to occupy my time but Blizzard killed all that, I have thought about buying a Rifle or a pistol to go blow off some steam at a range but at this point in my life a gun in my house would not be a good thing. Well, at least today I can say that I've gotten my mail and posted a meaningless reply on hadit. I'm sorry for what you're going through brother or sister. Damn AUG2013 is a great timetable. Hell, Put in a secondary claim for anxiety for giving you a timetable of 2 years lol. I've been out 3 years now and it just keeps going downhill. Walking past all the bums in San Francisco these last few months I couldn't help but think at times that they have it right. At least when you're hungry and hot or cold and miserable you are feeling something. Here in my apartment I have a big fancy TV and a big grill, and a bunch of nice shit but thats just it. It doesn't replace that Brotherhood in the Army. I went from not being able to masturbate without 6 people knowing to not talking to a single person for days at a time. Sorry, I just wanted to add this into this thread as I can't find a good enough hobby either. I think I might try to enter and clear abandoned buildings and businesses as coming home from Iraq in 2008 it seemed there were a lot of these out of business buildings. Although the jail time for B&E would not be so great which is another reason why beer drinking is a no go at this station. I would be far worse off if I ended up in jail lol. I'm with every last one of you vets that feel this way. They should set up a website called sausage links or something that linked up random vets. I know there are a bunch of vets around me but I would want it set up like match dot com where you give preference to MOS and gender and age and OEF or OIF, hell even add sports to it, that way I wouldn't be out with some POG (love you guys but I want stories as well that go beyond, this one time, in our flag football game on FOB Falcon this dude tore his knee up so bad it was gross lol) and be dominating the conversation with stories of actual war. There are enough Veterans out there now in my age group that we should really start finding ways to link up besides randomly showing up at a group because I know I myself don't have the balls/gumption to go group meetings or the where-with-all (sp?) to even leave the house. I don't know where this is going so I'm going to end it here lol. Damn PTSD, at least I was focused for 30 minutes.

I just want to add on to this thread that I can not stress what a wonderful tool this site is for guys such as myself that struggle with PTSD. I would not be able to get this information anywhere else as I just flat out wouldn't go in to my VARO or do anything where I thought I might be put in an awkward situation. Going into the admissions office at Stanford as a 32 year old was tough enough. I was so embarassed because I was so nervous I couldn't stop sweating, and that was just some random lady who gave me the University's pamphlet. Yeah its like that lol. But thank you for giving me a place that I don't need to do those things to get info. I was never like this before, thats what kills me. Should put a disclaimer in the recruiters office: Upon completion of your service you will be able to go use your GI Bill, but you may be completely nuts by then and it won't matter.

I am 32 years old and currently 100% TDIU mainly for PTSD with other small ailments; back, neck, etc.. I am planning on making a serious attempt at attending college. Everything involved with what I am doing is pretty consistent with PTSD as I was fine one day in my apartment in Wisconsin only to wake up hating my life and wanting to attend Stanford, so I left my fiancee (who was less than faithful come to find out while I was deployed) and moved to California. Going to school has become a new mission of mine and I have no misconceptions as to how hard this is going to be and as to the ramifications of going back and proving I can go on to some form of gainful employment. I just can't let the crap going on in my head keep me from using this benefit that I worked so hard to earn (the GI Bill I mean, not TDIU) This is what I joined for. I'm not going to lie and say I wanted to serve my country and all that, I wanted the benefits involved. I have always wanted to attend college. Christ, I have a 142 GT score so this is not a stretch for me to go, I just don't know how I am going to fare in the end. It is scary. If I look back to the past 4 years to the things that have happened when I try to venture into the outside world I can't help but worry about what it will be like to physically interact with others in something that I will not be able to just walk away from and say oh well. I am writing you guys to ask what is going to happen with my TDIU? Is merely putting in for your GI Bill grounds to reduce your ratings? I would hate to think that just by trying to ween myself off of the governments teet I would be yanking that lifeline away forever. Don't get me wrong, the ultimate motivation in this is to better myself and to go on to some sort of a career so I know in that event it will be taken away. What happens if I fail horribly though? Am I punished for trying? I am also 100% SSD for PTSD but through some research I think I have found that they give you 9 months to give yourself a shot. That is absolutely perfect and if I knew there was something like that for TDIU I could go to bed easy tonight knowing that now I only need to focus on giving this my everything and dealing with the mental problems as they come and not worry about every thing that the VA is watching to potentially cut my benefits. But if this is not the case and the VA will cutoff IU and use this as a grounds to never give you IU again, I have some serious soul searching to do. I would like to think that I am strong enough to do this and have no problems but this is the only thing that I know will not be the case. Thank you for any replys or answers. Feel free to ask anything you'd like. I just want to know whats going to happen and I also want to say that I'm not looking for the free ride of TDIU and college. I know what attending will mean to a TDIU claim, I just want to know what would happen if I fail. On a side note, I do believe I have a good chance at getting a 100% schedular rating as I am very close as it is and some ratings are still undervalued and I have never even put in for siezures and I take topamax and divalproex everyday to prevent them. But with that being said, I am at 100% TDIU and do not wish to open my claims back up for fear of looking a gift horse in the mouth so to say.

Not questioning you John999 but can you expound upon why my decision is not final? Is it because I'm not P&T, if it is I am SO glad I didn't go in and throw a fit lol.

Yeah I have SSD and I was awarded the TDIU in May2011. I wanted to file a CUE or call a CUE on them but my VFW rep filed an NOD and didn't even know that a person with TDIU could qualify for the S award so Bradley V Peake was not mentioned. I'm going in there tomorrow if I get some complete info on what to do but right now I'm hearing I shouldn't file a CUE and an NOD wasn't right but Bradley V Peake should be on there. I have a VSO rep that I have to speak through their belly for them to hear me so I'm waiting to hear from someone on here as to what should be the proper procedure to fix this situation.

Thats my problem with it is the C&P exams that have been scheduled. No question and nothing was brought up about the ratings. The NOD just said that based on the criteria set forth for the SMC-S award I meet the requirements based on prior findings (or something to that effect was written). 4 days later I have 1 C&P exam a week from today that I have no idea what it is, says MAROTZ CLINIC and I have another one 2 weeks from today that says MH CLINIC. In the Ratings Decision they sent me, in the IU section it lists that none of my other ratings preclude me from work and then go on to say that PTSD is the only one severe enough to warrant IU and IU is granted based on these findings. What are the strict rules and guidelines in filing a CUE as I can't find them. Filing an NOD means I disagree with their decision which isnt the case. I just think they made an error and that its incomplete and want to bring something to there attention. Thats why I think an NOD is wrong. If its normal for them to re-evaluate someone in this instance than fine but this shouldbn't be the case. They made a ruling and said I was good til 2013. Me going back in just means they can say well we can give you TDIU for PTSD and headaches so no SMC-S award for you which would be crap. Worse case scenario is they can take IU away altogether.

If this helps my ratings are as follows 70% PTSD granted 100%TDIU for PTSD 50% Sleep Apnea 20% DDD lower back 10% cervical strain 10% hypertension 10% GERD 10% tinnitus 10% headaches

So, this is now about the 5th time the VFW has not only not helped in my case, but misinformed to the point that I now believe my entire claim is in jeopardy. I was recently awarded 100% TDIU for PTSD and I also have enough ratings besides that that I am close to being schedular. In any case I meet the requirements for SMC-S. When I went to my VFW rep, they had no idea a person with TDIU could get SMC-S. Once she found out it could happen, she decided not to go with what I had said (me being the person who did all the work on these claims with the knowledge you guys have given me) and she decided we should file an NOD as opposed to a CUE. This was Tuesday when I filed this. Saturday morning I recieve a big envelope from the VA informing me that my claims are open again and I have multiple C&P exams coming in the next few weeks. Now before I go ballistic on this office, would it have been different had I filed a CUE as opposed to an NOD or would the CUE not have reopened the claims and not required C&P exams? Am I now in jeopardy, if I get some examiner thats having a bad day or something, of losing my TDIKU altogether if they say I was rated too high to begin with? This is just complete BS. This VFW office would've lost my backpay for $25K had I not informed them that an NOD could be filed longer than 60 days after claim, you can view my posts to see what all they've misinformed me on. Thank God for you guys or I would actually think these people are helping me. If the NOD is what caused the claims to be opened up please let me know what I need to do to correct this error. If the CUE would've reopened the claims and caused C&P exams as well please let me know so I don't need to go throw a bitch fit. Its not like I enjoy going into these places for them to screw me over. Christ I don't even like leaving my house these days. I just didn't want to have to deal with more C&P crap and it stresses me the hell out. I don't know what to do so any help would be very very appreciated.

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OK...so when I filed for TDIU I was at 80% and decided to file for TDIU based on my DDD in neck and back and for PTSD. DDD in back was increased to 20% and neck stayed at 10% while PTSD went from 30- 70%. The way it was worded was as follows: While the records cite that you contend with chronic cervical spine pain, and have some decreased range of motion of the lumbar spine with increased difficulties with lifting, the objective evidence of record does not show that your cervical and lumbar spine disabilities when considered alone, preclude you from gainful employment. However, the records do cite that due to the increased severity of your PTSD, your symptoms now impose a severe level of soclal and occupational impairment. Specifically, it was noted that you have overall worsening of sleep, worsening isolation, ongoing panic attacks and significant avoidance behaviors to the point that you rarely participate in activities. Chronic suicidal ideation was also identified. Additionally, the evidence shows that you contend with worsening cognitive symptoms over the course of the past year and such symptoms have caused you to miss appointments, pay bills late and repeat yourself in conversation. It is duly noted that you have a separate claim for service connected TBI, however, the mental health examiner specifically ascribed your cognitive impairment, to include memory impairment to your SC PTSD, therefore, these symptoms are given due consideration in the current 70% evaluation assigned to your PTSD disability. We have granted entitlement to IU because you are unable to secure or follow a substiantially gainful occupation as a result of you SC disability. We based our findings on your educational and vocational background, in addition to evidence from your VA examinations and treatment records. blah blah blah backdate to sept 09. So, question is how do I go about refiling for SMC-S. PTSD 70% Sleep apnea 50% DDD 20% headaches 10% GERD 10% neck 10% shoulder 10% hypertension 10% tinnitus 10% Question is do I file for CUE and say I should be granted SMC-S or what do I do. Problem is my VSO sux ass and I'm going to wait for what you guys chime in with before I go to my VSO. I would really love to absolutely BURN my VSO with exact reasons why I am asking for this as a last chance FU to them. HADIT.COM you guys educated me to the absolute end with my claims and I'm asking once again. These guys at the VFW are getting paid to help me and I could only wish the funds went to T-Bird, Berta, Carlie and various others that put in. HADIT very well should be a VSO. I'm an Iraq vet, you guys have won me TDIU and SSD and I have no one to thank but you guys.

Sawgunner, first thing I want to say is I am 31 and recently won SSDI and TDIU. OK, that being said, I have pretty much the same problems as you as far as getting work ie: bad back, bad legs, bad neck, no sleep and bad attitude. You're best bet to getting awarded these things is to open up a claim for PTSD. I think its fair to say that you might qualify based on the recent episode you had at work. I advise opening this claim up as none of your other limitations really warrant TDIU or SSDI at this time. PTSD is real and can stop you dead in your tracks. I would really appreciate if we could continue further in a more private forum. Send me a PM on here or email at gi.hambone28ATyahoo. I'm not a lawyer or a bot or anything if all the members read this and throw up red flags. Look at my content and I'm just a veteran in you're same situation and I have recently won my claims. I just don't feel like going thru the situation in public. I do want to say one thing and thats after readiing this site for 2 years I feel like I really could help you and I would love nothing more than to pay it forward to someone in your case. CC the PM and the replies or w/e I don't care. These people educated me and I'm ready to pay it back. I've actually rambled on 6 different versions of this reply since I saw your post last night lol. Screw it I'm posting it

My SSD claim was denied the first two times because they didnt have all the paperwork for one, and 2, I didnt actually submit the claim until july of 2010. They just backdated it to March of 2009 because that was the last time I got paid by the army. It definitely helps to have a lawyer as he was the one that clued me in to the fact that the SSA didn't have all my files so I probably would've been awarded 3 months after I submitted. Instead I waited until it was in the hearing phase to hire one and then I won a month later.

Unless I misunderstood the benefits page I believe theres more opened up to you if you are schedular as opposed to TDIU. If I'm wrong then by all means let me know.. Most of them are where they should be but a few are still underestimated and I want to get them adjustedwhile I still can file an NOD. Actually I just looked again and it looks like if you are P&T more benefits are opened up. Either way I still want to get my percentages where they should be. Most of them are rated correctly but a few are still underestimated and I want to get them corrected while I can file an NOD. 70% PTSD 50% Sleep Apnea 20% DDD ( this I believe should be higher or should have a secondary claim added to it or however that works) 10% Cervical Strain (neck) 10% GERD (should be higher as my esophagus and stomach have esophageal ulcers and have heartburn everyday.) 10% Headaches (this most definitely needs to be higher as I go to the ER with headaches all the time and I spend sometimes 5 days a week sitting in a quiet, dark room because they are so intense and I am limited as to what I can take for them as most stuff that somewhat works I can't take anymore. This rating is what they gave me as opposed to giving me a rating for TBI) 10% Tinnitus 10% Hypertension (should be higher as I always get readings where the bottom number is over 110 consistently) 10%Left Shoulder Strain 100% TDIU granted All of these symptoms are on record and my VSO rep didn't put on my original NOD where the ratings should be and why when we filed because she said it wasn't important even though I had already written it out. I even took the advice of the members on here and made sure the NOD disputes were short and to the point and it didn't even take up a half sheet of paper. She instead just wrote in the NOD that I disagreed with PTSD and TBI and said that everything would be checked again and they would increase the others if they felt they deserved it. I suppose you can say that its not important if I'm getting TDIU anyways but I don't see any harm in getting them where I feel they should be at.

You know, I never thought about it helping with Insomnia but I can say that after using my CPAP for the last 3 years, I could see where it could help a person focus on there breathing as the air blasts into your mouth or nostrils and could perhaps lull someone to sleep. Its almost like meditation as you just focus on breathing. I suppose anything is worth a shot and the meds they give you for insomnia just make you feel all doped up in the morning. I would be shocked if the VA would dole out the money to get one though before going through every sleep med known to mankind.