tdiu Help Me Clarify The Harm To Me By Fed, So I Can Stop The Harm.

[SCIDVET]

Fellow Citizens,

The harm to me is so great and so proved. I am spine cord disabled, inoperable, 90% and yet P&T.

The harm is: It took a lifetime to get it done.

To make this clear: "How useful are disability unemploment benefits decades late OR MORE?

People, I love my country, am not poor but hobbled by what little I have. If I got rid of home, could spend money at Mayo Clinic, as such great work REALLY was done by VA doctors and Military of keeping track of what happened when (and SO DID I).

As decades past, the brain trauma from injection of metrizamide into spinal cord and brain for Xray starts to clear.(accidentally mixed ten times too strong, it appears and or defective batch in 1980, inservice)/

However, because I cannot sue (feres doctrine) military, I was explained to to turn to VA IMMEDIATELY before getting out and accepting DD214. I did so and indicated request in 1981.

Let me take it from the top as 48 year old man no punches pulled AND NOTHING I SAY IS WITHOUT WRITTEN OR XRAY OR OBVIOUS UNQUESTIONABLE PROOF:

1) Minor back herniated disc. 1979.

2) injection of metrizamide causes Spinal cord disease Arachnoiditis. This makes inoperable!!! for LIFE>

3) Doctors operate to get to the disc that was the original problem that was not that bad.

4) Doctors operate incorrectly do not say so but miss and instead operate over the injection site- ironic- as the surgeon describes the harm- and is far far from he original injury (as he admits the next day in writing). They clearly describe the harm and adhesions.

5) I get very upset, having to tell Military Doctors what is wrong. How do I Know? Because am mechanic, electrician, can tell nothing had changed with the original back problem-but pain med also factor.

6) Navy trades me home and to another Army hospital they operate and record the harm from the arachnoiditis- NOT THE HERNIATED DISC- because they were halfway between the two (disc and injection).

Summary: Mild back problem. Injection making inoperable. Two operations anyway, they faithfully record what happened as they "Tried to dissect the nerves apart from each other"

Aside: What is really going on here is clear to any thinking person and I will not say it because I have no need to hurt your love for your own country. If you see it....Keep to yourself. Is too awful to ever say.

So why I write today:

I am 27 years into attempt to get minimal benefits, and have been working backwards in time since I got TDIU in late nineties. So far have worked back one year for every three years of waiting.

Now we at highest court (court of appeals, I think) and for first time have attorney, and paid, and I thank all USA and heaven for a little help past my brain injury from that injected chemical in 1980.

You see, I am broken man. I have reassembled self and it is not pretty but it is pretty powerful to be able to see "The king has no clothes" (government is transparent to me now, in every way I can imagine) except for this:

So the decades have passed, VA has committed so many heinous, harmful permanent, physical harms to me (incontinence, impotence, then made me fight about getting THOSE benefits! HEINOUS.

Now I have real citizen attorney whom I have written about how this current decision coming up will be about the 30th VA decision of my life that has always been overturned in my favor

FOR THE SAME xxxxxxx DISABILITY AND BENEFIT- TDIU.

So now, we at the highest court. My attorney gets a little quieter when I point out what is going on if the highest court just gives the benefit and that is all- I STILL HAVE TO FIGHT THE VA FOR LIFE>

Why: Doctors have no need to recognize the actual disability (never have) because that is not the RATING. The rating says "herniated disc" (and dont believe the crap about VA not using that info- I have had (in this case, perhaps number 22 success overturn on same xxxxxxx claim) I have had a decision overturned because the IDIOT at VA CITED MY VA DISABILITY CARD as proof of how disabled I was!

It is just so stupendously clear and evil and ignorant and HARMFUL TO THE UNITED STATES OF AMERICA AND CITIZEN.

WHy? Try this: Make the meanest toughest coolest fighting machine imaginable- A Marine- and then xxxx with his spinal cord and pretend you didnt. Then hand him into society, with a wink wink, nudge nudge, to the PORTLAND VA which immediately and for a decade makes the most beautiful recording (claim file) of error after error after error compounding error. Like not sending me notices, mixing me with other peoples claim file (and others having files in mine) and also: Refusing to put two and two together.

Example:

I come in for first VA physical. They say "How are you MR M----?" I see the trap (at 20 or so years old) and say tough: "I'll Live." (a true statement). The written view of that by VA is "Veteran feels the back problem is something he can live with".

Example: Same examination. I could not be examined for anything but herniated disc (but they did mention the other problems I reported (symptoms of arachnoiditis- stomach, mental, etc) so I had a choice in a VA physical:

1) Lie like hell and get benefits *(herniated disc not that bad, in reality)(arachnoiditis BAD but doesnt have same symptoms!)

2) Tell the truth and be essentially rejected not by decision and notice, but by a comedy of errors that spans a state (oregon) and half a decade at least.

I chose number Two, Pat, and xxxx LYING.

Lying is so awful and my religion does in fact dictate not to.

SO here is what I ask:

1) Does anyone dare try to summarize so that the anger and confusion of the above documentary is taken out and the sad true hateful thing can be made clear to my attorney

2) Does anyone have any idea what my rights are to speak with own attorney. Yes! I ranted to him (one email at a time, one subject, like cutting a diamond perfect case)/ I understand and it is my fault being a little cloudy of thought. Why: It is self destructive for a man to admit his own disease. It rubs his nose in it for life (the VA claim system that never says yes, but always gives ground with a few year delay in eacy denial, denial, small grant, denial chain that leads (over a lifetime of claim processing) into:

The very most well documented case of discrimination (intent is not mentioned by me) ever seen by the USA.

You think maybe Agent Orange and Atomic vets had it worse legally? They did not have proof!

The current system is in bad shape when I can show proof and work and get NOWHERE FOR MY WHOLE LIFE except money payment decades late that is worth a tiny fraction of its original value, and further, is only a little bit as useful as when I was FRIGGING STARVING AND FREEZING AND GETTING ARRESTED FOR BEING IN A DAMNED CLOTHING DONATION BOX IN SUB ZERO WEATHER/

Is there anyone that can read this that can help me overcome this terrbile terrible thing wihout taking Fox's ability to make the USA look really, really, really bad (waterboarding has NOTHING on torturing a vet for LIFE to keep him from treatment that will help him get treatment and healing and YES compensation.

I cant write any more am gonna throw up./

LOVE YOU ALL AND AMERICA. I DONT QUIT YOU SHOULD HAVE KILLED ME.

AM ALSO SMART ENOUGH NOT TO ACT OUT PHYSICALLY.

How many God Loved persons made THAT mistake already that are like me? (ALL OF THEM)

I owe it to them and you and Constitution to FIGHT THIS>

How am I gonna get my attorney to pay attention to my wants in this?

A few grand is nothing (the back pay retro we currently fight for) but saving a Country and a Life is something I AM HIGHLY MOTIVATE LIKE A NUCLEAR FIRE TO SAVE

If you (VA and FED) cannot deal with it- we need to replace the lot of you. As is provided in Constitution.

I am sorry people I cannot read this it destroy my soul Submitted without edit.

[SCIDVET]

P.S. Can you tell me about ARACHNOIDITIS?

There are several insults to the organism:

1) Spinal cord swells the bones it passes through does not. Like toothache but bigger.

2) Skeletal instability from errant surgeries makes causing a vast sudden incident from relaxing while standing in place. This may be recovered from or not, over days or never.

3) It is unquestionably the cause of impotence and pressure incontinence (gets worse, starts again with a brief injury event like number (2) above.

4) Pain and symptoms that do not fit under the word pain- like "Irritation" and "hyper-feeling" where I cannot let a piece of cloth touch toetips, or temperature is perceived wrong, hot and cold same time, sort of.

5) It makes disease itself and any other (original injury) inoperable and no injections either- all make more scar tissue and this expands at rate greater than spinal fluid ability to compensate.

6) Imagine a glass pop bottle. That is the skeleton holes. The nerves move through like a rope that easily slides in the hole in the neck of the pop bottle. now put rubber ball same size as hole on nerve. This keeps the nerve from moving normal and when it sticks, it swells and everything goes bad fast- I may not walk or sit or stand (stand for more than seconds) for 6 months and will recover mostly in a few years.

Notice this is not a pinched disc? Note the exponentially longer recovery time? The multiplex of harm? I am not done:

7) The disease is called "Arachnoiditis" which is accurate but sort of misleading too. The swelling "itis" is only part of problem. The nerve start sticking to each other in the spinal cord, and to everything they touch (in the spinal cord fluid that is changed). This makes tiny tears and daily microinjuries that (I Believe) must be minimized over many months to recover faster than getting worse.

8) Arachnoid: Double meaning. The nerves no longer hang like a horses brushed tail- but like spiderweb of bumps junctions and random stuff.

9) The interesting part to get past is the need to respond without question to symptoms the VA and the FED (who seem rather interested in results of accidental spinal cord injection, having redirected a surgery to the best viewing site twice) (I figured this out yesterday thanks to you guys).

Sorry.

The interesting thing is I have to keep busy enough not to waste away physically. Proof: You can take a marathon runner and put him in air bed, never let him get up, hand feed and in one month he will be unable to get off floor or out of airbed.

So dying and aging are much more about the result of sedentary activity than time. Now that sounds stupid but trust me have been studying the subject arena in general for almost thirty years. Also the Marines demonstrate quite clear how fast to whip somebody who is in good shape into supreme shape. It is the same but opposite when you dont get off the floor (mattress).

So that is "Part one, Arachnoiditis, A patients view" Now is part two, "Arachnoiditis, A Political prisoners view": (tough to live up to THAT word spin, you think?) Try this:

By forcing me to call Arachnoiditis a herniated disc, they have forced more disability, a lifetime of delay, physical worsening by injecting more stuff they arent supposed to, and caused the organ problems among others.

Fine, you think- this many symptoms, the VA has to take note! Nope. I dont look that bad. I take great care. When I show up at an appointment, if it is 160 miles away, I leave a day early and recover and show up. Otherwise am irritated babbling idiot. (pain makes a person frantic or flat, some of both, or one and the other and repeat)

The truth is I must go along with a big fat juicy proven and multiply hidden by clearly unmistakable and harmful error and in some juicier angles, I can even overcome "Presumption of regularity" because the proof is in Cfile they sent to some other guy.

So am really a time-trap political prisoner. If I had colon cancer, breast cancer, skin cancer, multiple sclerosis (like one of you confirm!) but "treatment caused disease" is worse than being a murderer.

After all dont murderers get fed while they delay 20 years and get out in 25 for murder? I was thinking this while eating garbage (good garbage) it dawned on me I am on lower rung than murderer. And I never committed a felonly (two no trespassings while freezing to death during or near time in question for current TDIU but evidently it is bad idea to tell truth about THAT.

(I harm no body, but when you face mortality you make a call. I had just failed out of Chapter 31 education and with it, housing, that a young girl from New Zealand took the FRIGGING place of the VA and paid for me. Because she was helping me get home, helping to be kind, it was some religious thing that is now quite out of vogue.)

Sorry.

The worst thing is arachnoiditis is as real as a missing leg, ten times more sensitive and crucial area to employment and thriving (do you have ANY IDEA how fast I would have legs removed if it would stop the leg pain??????????????) but arachnoiditis is utterly invisible as it strikes and disappears, makes all manner of symptoms, and is partly novel because of the exact place (nerves) the needle burnt most direct with the obnoxious fluid.

So arachnoiditis is the most enlightening disease a human could have. Be careful what you wish for- I wished to understand everything from "Problems of God" to "What is really at center of Earth" to "Why is the sky Blue".

Well I have had more time than anybody can imagine, and I am a compendium of much more than mere encyclopedia references (wikipedia is GOLD) am living example of why God knew it was a TOTAL JOKE for the Israelites to say "We dont want a God in the sky we want a Human King".

Well, here is what you get, I am only a decade or so before thousands will meet my (VA treatment, nationalized health care bait and switch) fate.

So I cannot keep my benefits without at least trying to make clear what is all about to the harming people who, remember I said, they are saving lives every second across the USA (the Veterans Administration).

But wait until there is a problem if you are not smart enough or whatever enough to lie and go along. You make yourself political prisoner and figure out ten-twenty-thirty years later what is really going on.

That is arachnoiditis.

Thank you and hope you overlook my wordiness. I have......time.

[SCIDVET]

P.S. Can you tell me about ARACHNOIDITIS?

Addendum: It also causes changes in the brain. Maybe am just novelty but in my case I cannot tell the whole story of mental harm, and physical harm. It is as if I cannot tolerate admitting both a great physical and mental disability. It has notably been like this for decades, but figured out only recent five years (guessing).

It also changes the spinal cord fluid, something about proteins and they make scar tissue not dissolve and the nerves stick instead of slide against each other.

It is my opinion attacks are like MS or a bad bad body flu- there comes a point where once past, there is a series of months and months (LITERALLY) to get standing up again. Merely standing to urinate for example might use up whole day of standing time.

It is my opinion that fatty cells and other stuff gets near these nerves, and when I gain weight it seems like (even if muscular weight) my back goes bad and stays that way fast. So a subtlety that is underlying the other 14 layers of challenges is if I do too good a job of getting better- I get worse.

This is over 27 years now. Some things are only clear long after the fact.

It is my opinion my going from "not caring about cold water" to "Absolutely resistant to anything but warm water" as I will lock up like it is real cold or have shivers. It doesnt look to bad but all of a sudden the lattice of muscles on my back all tighten, and pull me back wards a bit.

It is my opinion the change between being able to have two drinks or a beer and then having no ability to drink half beer before crushing headache is organic damage from this incident.

It is my experience that Motrin is a wonder drug, but after a few five gallon buckets to get work done (forcing self to work to eat, harming self in process, for decade or more) the five gallon buckets of motrin have harmed my stomach and am not able to take regularly and find like all things in life- the less you take the more powerful the effect. (Secret 9)

I forgot some more but that is most- oh@ I think the 20-30 things that make my skin go nuts are all but one or two caused by the spinal cord disease. Also, I agree with neurologists who say the skin is like window to nerves- but only so much- my skin looks.... better by far- than any 48 years old I know (maybe because out of sun). I have few wrinkles. But acne. Painful shingle like things that happen. More.

I guess that is the first 9 weeks of information of Arachnoiditis 101. Come back and we will try to explain the benefits of SCI when considering the human condition in the modern day.

Or maybe not.

[SCIDVET]

But, can you cook?

My beloved and muscly brain never stops cookin'. Does that count?

Even when I transcend space, time, Universe, and am back in time for lunch, I shall still refuse to cook or EVER do my laundry on time. Burning of steak and other mammal type offerings is however in my repertoire.

You?

[SCIDVET]

Your not alone and many Veterans were delayed earned benefits not only from the time they separated but after they applied.

I applied before discharge, immediately after, in a year, in two in four in five, went to school, applied repeatedly reopened claim without ever seeing a original or first decision for a decade from then.

I wrote so honest my own handwriting "Further, I feel sure something is being done to minimize the severity of the problem in my back about six inches further up" (and then VA records and decides "your stomach and depression problems are personality disorder).

But wait! THEN THE VA CHANGES ITS MIND AND SAYS IT IS THE HERNIATED DISC.

So it all comes down to this "How many times do I have to let the VA say "oops" you're right there is 16 lane freeway wide of entitlement- here let me show you a picture of the on ramp you could be on now if you had just lied and played ball."

If VA were a well intentioned drunk driver he would have wrecked (gone off legal highway and causing me harm) 23 times or more (each decision that is overturned, one by one, first in the present, then the past then decades before..

I could have said it more accurate above by telling you the truth, Pete:

" A certain sergeant major and sergeant stuck me in the face with a phone so hard I got wedged between the file cabinets like butterfly on stickpins"

"SGT MAJOR: "If you dont shut up we will put you in jail and we dont mean civilian and we do not need a reason. (telling me to stop trying to get appt to see navy doctor, my liason person.)

So I applied. Until blue in face. And was just as successful finding a home (compensation) as the butterfly- it is gonna be a life sentence to finish playing VA game if we cannot ever approach a very ugly truth. A mans life is and will be ruined if we do not stop the bullshit.

SO I get it, Pete, I should maybe not worry so much, but on other hand, what of those eating garbage, starving, homeless, hanging on NOW. Do I not owe it to them also, to fight until the last day, for the Federal Government to stop destroying its good citizens lives at whim, and ignorantly too.

[LarryJ]

Okay, all right already.........I'm beginning to hear the sounds of hovering, flying, disc-shaped objects and I'm smelling high concentrations of ozone.

[tagandbag]

Okay, all right already.........I'm beginning to hear the sounds of hovering, flying, disc-shaped objects and I'm smelling high concentrations of ozone.

No, Ive landed on an alien planet and not sure what this life form wants with us humans...QUICK SCOTTY BEAM ME UP. :)