This question is sort of in line with the salary while TDIU question. I have been TDIU since May of this year. I had surgery in March and had intended to go back to work afterward. The surgery, an L3-S1 fusion, ended up kicking my butt. Everything imaginable was worst after that. I filed for SS and was denied which is now on appeal scheduled to be in front of a judge in September of this year. My marriage has been going downhill for a while based on my disabilities, finances, and other issues. When all said in done with my VA appeals and SS all our debt will be paid off and life from a monetary stance will be okay. The problem is that I can't take staying home and my wife is miserable. I had a good career as an IT security engineer prior to this surgery. I easily made 100k a year plus my 90% VA.
It's now been 10 months since surgery and I feel staying home is causing more issues for my back and mental problems then work actually would. The problem is I don't know if I can handle work. Sitting has always been a huge problem for me. The pain after sitting for 10-15 minutes can be severe. Standing too long can also bring it on too. I'm still on large amounts of opiates including 90 mg of oxycodone and 120 mg of morphine per day. I have been on doses like that since 2006. I don't think at this point I am any worse now than before surgery. Work wasn't always fun and I can suck up a ton of pain but I realize it also made me happy. I would just deal with the pain and then usually lay down as soon as I got home. I'm pretty sure based on the fact I really don't need to lift anything and really just work on my laptop that I could go back to work and make it. Yes I would still need the opiates but at least I'd be out of the house and be making much more money than I am now.
One of my wife's major complaints is that we don't go out enough and have fun. My wife constantly says she wants a divorce and to part ways. We have 2 children together and she has one from a previous marriage. Honestly my back got worse and worse since we bought a house and moved in together. The stress of trying to maintain a house and then having small children really did a number on me. Prior to moving in with her I had an apartment that had no upkeep and if I wasn't working or out with friends I was home in a stress free environment. My kids are the most important thing to me. I am starting to think divorce is the way to go. I don't want any of this affecting them (although it probably already has). So even though it kills me I'm thinking going back to work, getting divorced, and seeing my kids as much as I can is the route to go. I think my stress level will go down so much that my back probably will get better.
Sorry for turning this into a counseling session but I felt I needed to let it out. My real question is if I go back to work do you think I can try it out for a few months and if I feel I can handle it then let the VA know? I will go from 100% to 90%. I just don't want to tell them and then not be able to handle work. I don't care if I need to pay them back a few months. I just kind of want some security. Has anyone ever heard of someone doing this? I didn't know if the VA had any type of program for this. I know that SS has a return to work program where you can try to go back and if it doesn't work out you don't have to re-apply again you just keep your benefits.
"The willingness with which our young people are likely to serve in any war, no matter how justified, shall be directly proportional to how they perceive the Veterans of earlier wars were treated and appreciated by their nation."
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dav_marine72
Hi Everyone,
This question is sort of in line with the salary while TDIU question. I have been TDIU since May of this year. I had surgery in March and had intended to go back to work afterward. The surgery, an L3-S1 fusion, ended up kicking my butt. Everything imaginable was worst after that. I filed for SS and was denied which is now on appeal scheduled to be in front of a judge in September of this year. My marriage has been going downhill for a while based on my disabilities, finances, and other issues. When all said in done with my VA appeals and SS all our debt will be paid off and life from a monetary stance will be okay. The problem is that I can't take staying home and my wife is miserable. I had a good career as an IT security engineer prior to this surgery. I easily made 100k a year plus my 90% VA.
It's now been 10 months since surgery and I feel staying home is causing more issues for my back and mental problems then work actually would. The problem is I don't know if I can handle work. Sitting has always been a huge problem for me. The pain after sitting for 10-15 minutes can be severe. Standing too long can also bring it on too. I'm still on large amounts of opiates including 90 mg of oxycodone and 120 mg of morphine per day. I have been on doses like that since 2006. I don't think at this point I am any worse now than before surgery. Work wasn't always fun and I can suck up a ton of pain but I realize it also made me happy. I would just deal with the pain and then usually lay down as soon as I got home. I'm pretty sure based on the fact I really don't need to lift anything and really just work on my laptop that I could go back to work and make it. Yes I would still need the opiates but at least I'd be out of the house and be making much more money than I am now.
One of my wife's major complaints is that we don't go out enough and have fun. My wife constantly says she wants a divorce and to part ways. We have 2 children together and she has one from a previous marriage. Honestly my back got worse and worse since we bought a house and moved in together. The stress of trying to maintain a house and then having small children really did a number on me. Prior to moving in with her I had an apartment that had no upkeep and if I wasn't working or out with friends I was home in a stress free environment. My kids are the most important thing to me. I am starting to think divorce is the way to go. I don't want any of this affecting them (although it probably already has). So even though it kills me I'm thinking going back to work, getting divorced, and seeing my kids as much as I can is the route to go. I think my stress level will go down so much that my back probably will get better.
Sorry for turning this into a counseling session but I felt I needed to let it out. My real question is if I go back to work do you think I can try it out for a few months and if I feel I can handle it then let the VA know? I will go from 100% to 90%. I just don't want to tell them and then not be able to handle work. I don't care if I need to pay them back a few months. I just kind of want some security. Has anyone ever heard of someone doing this? I didn't know if the VA had any type of program for this. I know that SS has a return to work program where you can try to go back and if it doesn't work out you don't have to re-apply again you just keep your benefits.
Thanks for reading.
USMC 1st Battalion 1st Marines 1st Marine Division 91-95
100% P&T
"The willingness with which our young people are likely to serve in any war, no matter how justified, shall be directly proportional to how they perceive the Veterans of earlier wars were treated and appreciated by their nation."
George Washington
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