ptsd Ptsd/mst Denial

[lp56]

Thank you in advance for sensitivity to these questions. I entered the army in 1976 and the two years I spent in the military was nothing but sexual harassment, intimidation, sexual battery and even rape. Reporting to my superiors what was happening to me only made it worse; in fact, my superiors were very often the ones coercing, intimidating and assaulting me. It is gut-wrenching to think or speak about all the horrible things that happened to me, but I will say that I was so despondant and desperate to get out of the army and away from all the abuse I was suffering that I actually married the soldier who raped and impregnated me. Suicide and abortion were the alternatives. At the time, I made the only choice I could to survive. While married, my ex did horrible things to my children, which gave me the courage to divorce. I have been diagnosed with PTSD due to MST from several VA doctors and the C&P examiner. I have been in therapy for over 2 years. It took over 30 years to confide in a professional about what happened in the military and although I have documented all the stressors well and have many letters from family and friends and one year of psych records, I have no official police reports or medical evidence except the pregnancy to corroborate my claims. My claim was denied because the examiner said it is "unlikely" anyone would marry the person who raped them. They also said one of my journal entries said I laughed with my ex. They also said my PTSD was more likely due from my daughter being molested, which was not service connected. There was no mention whatsoever of any of the other reported MST I documented in my claim or that were in my psych records and how any of that caused my PTSD.

I plan to file a NOD, but want to make sure I do it correctly. Here are my questions about the NOD. Should I send in any additional information, such as more psych records and letter from pastor who counseled me with the NOD? The psych records document everything if someone would only read them. Should the NOD be a standard letter with the required info or should I address the reasons why they denied me? Should I have lawyer represent me or wait to see if I need to appeal further? I was really expecting a Women Veteran Coordinator to contact me because of the sensitivity of the MST claim, but I was not contacted. I am hoping someone with more experience and sensitivity with MST will review my case. I really appreciate any advice on what to do next. Thank you.

[mysticcherokee usn vet]

St Pete is the office ive got to go thru too. Maybe not after reading that sept 09 case, in st pete. One smart cookie there!cue would be sooooo good. They said there was no evidence of a pregnancy or abortion in my msr, but they had it. Saw it in my cfile. They said my vet ctr. mh counselor wasnt qualidified to rate me scd for ptsd, and dint read a single file past the nexxus letter he prepared. it was the meanest denial letter anybody could ever received. yeah, yer one messed up mf, but no from US! Mystic

Sorry l56, Ill go start my own thread, somhow. Im new, just got here today, after lurking for years, and then I saw your thread. I was compelled....to join.Good Luck Lady! Sincerely, Mystic

[lp56]

St Pete is the office ive got to go thru too. Maybe not after reading that sept 09 case, in st pete. One smart cookie there!cue would be sooooo good. They said there was no evidence of a pregnancy or abortion in my msr, but they had it. Saw it in my cfile. They said my vet ctr. mh counselor wasnt qualidified to rate me scd for ptsd, and dint read a single file past the nexxus letter he prepared. it was the meanest denial letter anybody could ever received. yeah, yer one messed up mf, but no from US! Mystic

Sorry l56, Ill go start my own thread, somhow. Im new, just got here today, after lurking for years, and then I saw your thread. I was compelled....to join.Good Luck Lady! Sincerely, Mystic

Thanks Mystic. The support on Hadit is awesome and I hope they can help you like they have helped me. The pain and frustration of going thru this is bad enough, but without expert/experienced advice, it would be nearly impossible. Good Luck to you as well.

Edited January 30, 2012 by lp56

[mysticcherokee usn vet]

Thanks Mystic. The support on Hadit is awesome and I hope they can help you like they have helped me. The pain and frustration of going thru this is bad enough, but without expert/experienced advice, it would be nearly impossible. Good Luck to you as well.

Hugs Sister Friend! Ditto! Mystic

[lp56]

I feel very fortunate that I have been able to maintain a job with PTSD. It seems like working prevents me from total isolation and gives me purpose to wake every morning. I may have the opportunity to get a civil service job in the next few months, but the job requires a secret security clearance. I feel very anxious and discouraged however, because I can't bear the thought of people going through my VA medicals records to see it I am fit for a clearance. At one time, I reviewed security clearances myself, but we mostly looked for financial issues that would make someone vulnerable to acts of monetary gain. I never dealt with health issues on clearances.

I have heard if you have PTSD due to "combat related" causes you do not have to declare that you have or are seeking mental health counseling. Although my PTSD is sc and is due to MST, it is not combat related as I understand the new guidelines. So does this mean I would have to disclose that I have or am receiving mental health counseling which would make me subject to a complete medical record review by those who perform the security clearance check? I don't want to lose my current job by going to civil service and then lose that one too because I can't get a clearance based on PTSD. I am in such a knot on what to do. Does anyone have any knowledge on security clearances as they relate to PTSD due to MST? My current job is not bad, but the civil service job would be a pay raise and more benefits.

This is just one more area I feel like there is such discrimination against those with MST related PTSD. Why aren't the PTSD standards, rules, etc., treated the same instead of only favoring combat related PTSD? It is so sad and disheartening to live with the traumatic events and horrible memories of everything that happened to me in the military and then to be discounted so easily because my PTSD is not significant enough to be recognized and accepted by a system who is suppose to care for their veterans.

I go for my second C&P exam in 2 weeks and although I don't have an official disability rating for PTSD due to MST yet, I am hopeful I will be awarded one. Since I am currently working, I don't expect 100% which allows me to work right? If I do get a disablility rating for PTSD, how exactly will that affect me when it comes to working and trying to live a normal life? I want to get better and lead a normal life, but I feel like seeking medical treatment or disability for PTSD due to MST is one of those damned if you do and damned if you don't propositions. I just need some straight answers and helpful guidance please. I am sorry, but I find myself in a position where I don't know what to do again.

[carlie]

Keep in mind that even tho we know something is the result of AD -

it's never SC'd until VBA adjudicates it as SC'd.

[lp56]

Keep in mind that even tho we know something is the result of AD -

it's never SC'd until VBA adjudicates it as SC'd.

Carlie, I know I may or may not get SC'd for PTSD, but since I am under treatment for the same I still wonder how that will affect my clearance application. Are you saying since I do not have a disability rating for PTSD at the present time, the guidance given for disclosing PTSD regarding a security clearance does not apply to me and I need to disclose my record of mental health counseling for a security application. Even if I get a rating for PTSD, it is the combat related part of the exemption I wonder about on a clearance application. If I didn't disclose I had mental health treatment on my security application and then I was later rated for PTSD, will that be a trigger for all to know and/or inquire about me? I have been very private about my struggles and really don't want anyone knowing my business, especially since people get so nosey about disabilities. I still feel shame when I even have to mention PTSD due to MST. I don't want people to know what happened to me, let alone ask me questions about it or feel pity on me.