ptsd Ptsd/mst Denial

[lp56]

Thank you in advance for sensitivity to these questions. I entered the army in 1976 and the two years I spent in the military was nothing but sexual harassment, intimidation, sexual battery and even rape. Reporting to my superiors what was happening to me only made it worse; in fact, my superiors were very often the ones coercing, intimidating and assaulting me. It is gut-wrenching to think or speak about all the horrible things that happened to me, but I will say that I was so despondant and desperate to get out of the army and away from all the abuse I was suffering that I actually married the soldier who raped and impregnated me. Suicide and abortion were the alternatives. At the time, I made the only choice I could to survive. While married, my ex did horrible things to my children, which gave me the courage to divorce. I have been diagnosed with PTSD due to MST from several VA doctors and the C&P examiner. I have been in therapy for over 2 years. It took over 30 years to confide in a professional about what happened in the military and although I have documented all the stressors well and have many letters from family and friends and one year of psych records, I have no official police reports or medical evidence except the pregnancy to corroborate my claims. My claim was denied because the examiner said it is "unlikely" anyone would marry the person who raped them. They also said one of my journal entries said I laughed with my ex. They also said my PTSD was more likely due from my daughter being molested, which was not service connected. There was no mention whatsoever of any of the other reported MST I documented in my claim or that were in my psych records and how any of that caused my PTSD.

I plan to file a NOD, but want to make sure I do it correctly. Here are my questions about the NOD. Should I send in any additional information, such as more psych records and letter from pastor who counseled me with the NOD? The psych records document everything if someone would only read them. Should the NOD be a standard letter with the required info or should I address the reasons why they denied me? Should I have lawyer represent me or wait to see if I need to appeal further? I was really expecting a Women Veteran Coordinator to contact me because of the sensitivity of the MST claim, but I was not contacted. I am hoping someone with more experience and sensitivity with MST will review my case. I really appreciate any advice on what to do next. Thank you.

[11cvolley]

LP56, You have a very good chance at winning your case. You have way more evidence then I do and you're sticking with it. Either way your hearing goes good job to you for being brave, tough, and standing up for yourself.

[lp56]

In just a week I will go for my DRO Hearing. Last week I made contact with my designated VFW rep that will be at the hearing to find out where to meet, what to bring, what to expect, etc. First off, he confused me by telling me that the hearing would be a teleconference with a judge in DC. I knew I was in trouble because he thought I was coming to the regional office for a BVA Hearing. When I told him I am coming regional office for a DRO Hearing, he must have figured out a little something about my case because the first thing this man said to me was, "I will tell you that you are going to have a very difficult time winning this case." Quite honestly, I was shocked by his attitude and I felt like he just stabbed me in the heart. All I could do was cry. I was able to ask him if he even read my case and he said, "No." He said he has a lot of cases and can't possibly read them all. I also asked him if he had any experience with MST. I don't think he even knew what that meant. After I told him military sexual trauma, it seemed like he got uncomfortable talking to me. He said, only a psychiatrist could probably sort out all the issues regarding this kind of trauma. I asked him if I was going to have to fight him as well or was he going to be of any support. Of course he said I didn't have to fight him.

My concern and question is this: Will this assigned VFW rep hurt me by even being in the room during my hearing? Honestly, I don't even want to look at him or him hear my story now. Because I don't know the DRO Hearing process, I don't even know what his role in all of this will be. He did say this process was nonadvesarial and that if would help if I wrote my speaking points down. Besides getting a very negative vibe from him, those two points were the only helpful things he said to me. Don't VSOs work for the veteran and not the VA? I just don't have a good feeling about this hearing, especially about pouring my guts out to total strangers who won't be sensitive to anything I say about the sexual trauma I suffered. I am afraid this is going to be so hard to do and I won't be able to keep my composure through the hearing.

I am getting very, very nervous, but I do have all my copies together and I am going to write down the points I want to cover based on the denial I received. I did send in additional evidence in the form of 62 pages of emails to and from my former spouse and my pastor referencing occurrences of MST in the military, the letter and cards to my parents during basic, AIT and my permanent duty station and a letter from my mom on how I was before the military and how I was after I got out up to now. After my initial denial and with my NOD, I sent in a year's worth of mental health medical records, copies of my original journal they cherry picked information from, and a copy of my son's birth certificate to show I got pregnant and the time frame. I am still trying to recover medical records concerning my pregnancy, but other than everything else I sent in, I don't know what else I can submit as evidence. It was Divine Intervention that I found all the emails that I did and that my mom saved my cards and letters while I was in the military.

This forum and the resources that have been posted regarding MST and Stockholm Syndrome have been very helpful. Thank you so much. At least on this forum, it seems like someone cares!

LP56, You have a very good chance at winning your case. You have way more evidence then I do and you're sticking with it. Either way your hearing goes good job to you for being brave, tough, and standing up for yourself.

[john999]

In 1976 the military and VA probably did not belive MST could even happen in the Army. They did not believe in PTSD.

I remember that in early 70's vets did not get true psychiatric discharges unless they were insane.

[Ethan'sGrandma]

lp56,

I'm sorry you encountered with what appears to be an attitude from your VSO. Still, your recent find of additional "alternative" evidence is very good, so all you can do is do the best you can in presenting your case. There is still optimism, especially, considering all you have found. It will all depend on how the VA decides to interpret it. DRO is not the final process, so you still have many opportunities, which helps to remember that, I think. Now, regarding VSO and mst claims, it is good to at least be a little weary, I think, not necessarily a good thing, but it will not be a surprise if VSO is not as helpful as you would like. In my experience, mine has no clue about MST! In fact, originally he attempted to dissuade me from ever continuing with the claim, but I did anyway. The organization had already been selected as POA and I could not find another organization that would help me, once the claim was on appeal because they preferred to let the original POA continue what had been started. I was unable to change VSO within the organization because they are assigned by last names and he is the one for mine. Ridiculous, but that's not helping me any to think that. I have made contact with the National Office, but still get referred to the VSO for any questions. This guy truly does not know squat about mst, nor cares, but it's really our claim, so we are the ones that need to stay on top. My VSO wasn't even ready when I went to the hearing because I wasn't even in the computer as attending the hearing, even as I'd confirmed with him previously, and he knew about it through VA, but the staff went looking for him within the building once I arrived, so I know he never got to reviewing my file. You will be given an opportunity to speak, so you can still attempt to make your case. In my case, I took new evidence that had only recently been found, but it was not looked at right there, only turned in through VSO. I don't think this is all designed as personal because that same organization has helped vets that I know, tremendously, with a lot of involvement, but for combat related PTSD. That has made me wonder if it is the mst related PTSD issue that they are not following the equal interest with. However, we are our own best advocate, so you can still hope that you will succeed, just a matter of the VA accepting the evidence as valid and meeting all the other requirements necessary for a favorable decision. That doesn't mean that they always follow what's clearly within their laws, seems more like a subjective decision to me, but they've recently been given additional information as to how these claims should be being looked at by the newer Undersecretary which may help many of the mst claims. That will still remain to be seen how the VA will proceed, but it does offer additional hope. So, although it's not unheard of to be a bit leery about an unhelpful VSO, the evidence is what's going to matter. Best luck with your claim!

[11cvolley]

My old VSO laughed at me and said there was no way I would get SCed for being "roughed up on the playground." Her words. Well I got a new VSO, stayed on top of my claim and won the first time.

The other forum, Yuku veteran?, did not have a very warm welcome for MST and I had many of the mods, major posters telling me I had no case. DONT ever let someone get to you that says you have no case. You DO have a case.

LP, there are lots of people that care but can't post or don't know about these forums. Stick to treatment, don't let your case expire and you'll win.

[carlie]

lp,

At the hearing - stick to the evidence of record and the issue at hand.

It is best to try and not get too emotional and for sure I would not

go into talking about how much the VBA has put me through and how bad I need the money.

Not suggesting you would but this is just for hearings in general and for all readers.