Applying for Bipolar, Depression and Anxiety-Need Help

[JohnnyRain]

Hello, I am new. My name is Johnny. I was discharged from the Army for "patterns of misconduct". I was in the Army in early 90's and went back in in 2007 at the age of 37. My second round in my third year the wheels came off my life. (I had a stellar career in the early 90's and a stellar career up until late 2009) I was asked TOLD I need to apply for alcohol rehab. (As you know if they force you into rehab, it's a game-changer). When I got back I went back to drinking. I got an Article 15 (Captains Mass for Marines and Navy). It was the worst kind a field grade which meant I lost my NCO status. I was suicidal and they put me on the psych ward a couple of times. A month or so later I got another Article 15 for drinking. I had an argument with a lady in the PX while buying alcohol and I had a lot of risky behavior that is all on record. I also went to rehab again. Twice in a few months. My unit put me on suicide watch twice which I had to be watched by an NCO and a lower ranked Soldier 24 hours a day for months at a time. What I didn't know is that I was experiencing mania and depressive cycles. Doctors asked me if I have ever been diagnosed for bipolar and I simply told them that I wasn't. Honestly I didn't really know anything about bipolar. They just took my word for it. I was asked if I was bipolar while I was in the Army and after I got out. I must have been asked over 10 times.

There's a lot of other stuff for the "patterns of misconduct". Not just drinking stuff which now makes sense, since I have very recently accepted I am bipolar 1, which is the worst kind. If it was just the drinking it would have been a different discharge. I wouldn't have gotten an honorable either, which was very close because I had to go to a board to get it. Those were stressful times on my unit. I still feel bad about all of that. I have a lot of guilt. 

Since my discharge I have been to rehab multiple times (I don't know how many). If I take a job and I travel anywhere I will be in a VA Hospital in a matter of weeks. So I have been to 6 VA Hospitals on the psych ward for depression, anxiety and substance abuse. I am depressed and have anxiety. I have had 2 suicide attempts. One attempt was in a VA Hospital about 6 years ago. Another about 3 years ago. I have been homeless twice Hospitalized about 30 or so times due to anxiety and alcohol and drug abuse. I'm pretty much unemployable. I'm going to school on the GI Bill and have a 1.6 gpa. Not that I'm dumb or a bad student I just get hospitalized a lot plus I can't concentrate. It takes me forever to do homework that should only take 1 hour. All of this is provable and on paper except how long it takes me to do homework. I can get letters written by bunches of people if I have to. I have been recently diagnosed with bipolar and the psych doc on the psych doc says he personally saw me experience a manic episode. I can't keep a job or a girlfriend. Getting both is easy. Keeping them are hard. The only friends I have were in the Army with me. I have no new friends. I can't keep them. 

The DAV put the hurry up on paperwork since I'm about to be homeless again. I was getting my apartment for free. All I had to do is report problems about the tenants and pick up trash. Since I go into the hospital a lot they are terminating me and I will be homeless. I can't do a Grant Per Diem because I've already done it 3 times. They only allow you 3 for a lifetime. Grant Per Diem is when they put you in a group home with Veterans. It's sober living. They make you attend AA meetings. They give you room and board up to six months. I've spent all 3 of them in 2 years. 

My question is where do I go from here? I don't want their money. I want fixed. I know you guys aren't doctors so I won't ask you for medical advice. I just want to know what is going to happen if anything. 

Thank you for reading and thanks to all who reply. 

 

[Buck52]

Johnny Rain

sorry to hear your going through a bad time of your life  but you can fix it.... you need to get into VA Therapy  or private...and try to get better learn the tools you need to cope with your MH Problem. detox yourself  is something that has to be done and stay away from the booze

what you mention don't add up

''Doctors asked me if I have ever been diagnosed for bipolar and I simply told them that I wasn't. Honestly I didn't really know anything about bipolar. They just took my word for it. I was asked if I was bipolar while I was in the Army and after I got out. I must have been asked over 10 times.''

 First of all Dr's can read your medical records to see what you been diagnose for they don't need to ask you this, I notice later on in your post you mention

''I have been recently diagnosed with bipolar and the psych doc on the psych doc says he personally saw me experience a manic episode.''

TO FILE A CLAIM

1.First, begin the PTSD claim process by gathering all the evidence you plan to use. You can request your Claims File (C-File) from the VA. This will have all your medical records kept by the VA.

2.If you don’t have military records of your PTSD stressor event, get buddy statements. You can even use both to bolster your PTSD claim.

3.You can request medical records from private doctors, psychologists, and other medical professionals to submit with your PTSD claim.

if you been in combat  VA concedes the stressor,  your CIB will be on your DD-214

You can also file your application by mail. 21-526EZ

Remember, if you need assistance I Suggest seek an experienced attorney or VA Claims Agent.

You need a PTSD diagnose to come from a VA Dr. V.A. Requires it.

Get help you seem to need it  but your going to have to want it and have it in your mind/heart your going to get better.

you should be able to get the help you need from the VA but if you don't listen to them  then yeah they will put you out...I don't know what to tell you?  maybe some of the other members can chime in here and advise you.

Edited November 25, 2018 by Buck52

[JohnnyRain]

6 hours ago, Buck52 said:

Johnny Rain

sorry to hear your going through a bad time of your life  but you can fix it.... you need to get into VA Therapy  or private...and try to get better learn the tools you need to cope with your MH Problem. detox yourself  is something that has to be done and stay away from the booze

what you mention don't add up

''Doctors asked me if I have ever been diagnosed for bipolar and I simply told them that I wasn't. Honestly I didn't really know anything about bipolar. They just took my word for it. I was asked if I was bipolar while I was in the Army and after I got out. I must have been asked over 10 times.''

 First of all Dr's can read your medical records to see what you been diagnose for they don't need to ask you this, I notice later on in your post you mention

''I have been recently diagnosed with bipolar and the psych doc on the psych doc says he personally saw me experience a manic episode.''

TO FILE A CLAIM

1.First, begin the PTSD claim process by gathering all the evidence you plan to use. You can request your Claims File (C-File) from the VA. This will have all your medical records kept by the VA.

2.If you don’t have military records of your PTSD stressor event, get buddy statements. You can even use both to bolster your PTSD claim.

3.You can request medical records from private doctors, psychologists, and other medical professionals to submit with your PTSD claim.

if you been in combat  VA concedes the stressor,  your CIB will be on your DD-214

You can also file your application by mail. 21-526EZ

Remember, if you need assistance I Suggest seek an experienced attorney or VA Claims Agent.

You need a PTSD diagnose to come from a VA Dr. V.A. Requires it.

Get help you seem to need it  but your going to have to want it and have it in your mind/heart your going to get better.

you should be able to get the help you need from the VA but if you don't listen to them  then yeah they will put you out...I don't know what to tell you?  maybe some of the other members can chime in here and advise you.

I was in the Army twice yet had a 13 year break. I think they were asking if a civilian or anybody at all even from the other VA's has diagnosed me. VA's don't share info very well. You just can't show up at a VA and expect them to be able to pull up your record.

I never said anything about PTSD. Is that what triggers bipolar. Honestly, I know nothing about bipolar. I would rather be fixed than have money.

If it is PTSD then I know what it came from. Stressed out over my kids.

[broncovet]

I think you need to understand ONE thing:  

Quote

No one can fix you but you.  Your brokeness, is mostly a result of your bad choices.  

To fix YOU, you need to:

1.  Acknowledge your problem, and dont blame others.  Its not your spouse, your kids, your boss, or even the war's fault.  You probably need long term AA treatment.  

1.  Start making good choices. Stop making bad choices.    This means saying no to alcohol and drugs, to start.  

1.  Get involved with your local church, and acknowledge you can not beat this foe without "his" help.  

    Why are they all "number 1"?   I think you need all 3 of these things, but it may not matter which is first.  

Edited November 26, 2018 by broncovet
add more

[JohnnyRain]

2 hours ago, broncovet said:

I think you need to understand ONE thing:  

To fix YOU, you need to:

1.  Acknowledge your problem, and dont blame others.  Its not your spouse, your kids, your boss, or even the war's fault.  You probably need long term AA treatment.  

1.  Start making good choices. Stop making bad choices.    This means saying no to alcohol and drugs, to start.  

1.  Get involved with your local church, and acknowledge you can not beat this foe without "his" help.  

    Why are they all "number 1"?   I think you need all 3 of these things, but it may not matter which is first.  

I'm not blaming anyone. I just want help. I've been to treatment many times but I didn't realize I'm bipolar when I went. 

[vetquest]

Buck52 outlined what you need to do to get rated for a disability.  Broncovet named three things you need to do now.  If you are drinking you will not get fixed.  If you can get into a VA hospital and start treatment please do so.  Bipolar can be treated, I live with a woman who was bipolar and on her medications she was great as long as she stayed away from alcohol.

[seminoles]

4 hours ago, vetquest said:

Buck52 outlined what you need to do to get rated for a disability.  Broncovet named three things you need to do now.  If you are drinking you will not get fixed.  If you can get into a VA hospital and start treatment please do so.  Bipolar can be treated, I live with a woman who was bipolar and on her medications she was great as long as she stayed away from alcohol.

I have bipolar II disorder, and no medication has ever "worked" for me, I am highly med sensitive and it is VERY complicated, add to that diagnosis PTSD and it is a hot mess of trying to treat with my med. issues.  I do not and have never drank so that I cannot say anything about but don't think that just because one woman was fine who had bipolar and took her meds that everyone who has bipolar disorder is the same, we are not sadly.  If only it were that simple