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Will I Escape My Anti-Social World

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82airborne

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Well this is a new thread. I have completed a 16 week course of psychotherapy in a group of about 10-15 people. I have realized I prefer being alone away from strangers. I hate going to hospitals and it's a bunch of STrANGE individuals around me. Right now I'm feeling extra jittery lightheaded shaky all of the above. My question is how will psychs are MEDS stop these crazy thoughts that I have. Will I stay jittery. I swear I take about close to tn pills a day my primary are physician says that my liver points are up. It could be because of the pills I don't know. That's one reason I been paranoid of going to the doctor. When I didn't go to the doctor all my lab results was fine. Now that I keep current with doctors it seems my health s getting worse and worse. Ok I'm 90% disabled my income is ok and stable but it as done nothing far as my mind and the way I think. So I realize like a said months ago no money in the world would benefit you if your mind isn't right. So yes I plan on staying in therapy just not group counseling. I will only leave the house for doctor visits and psych visits. I will avoid being around strangers because I still have a very violent side that's easily provoked. This February I turn 40. Will I part I doubt it. I have no real. Desire to party with others. Even with my family I have mild desires of being with. So this is where I'm at right now. My insurance waiver has been waived for 10,000 dollars of insurance I called the insurance to check and make sure I was right because in my health right now death. Is certan to my future. I told her I was 90% disabled and my fees was waived she said the only way it was waived if I was Lund totally disabled. So I guess they got me at 10O% disable they just haven't told me. I don't know. I plan on calling the 800 number to check to see if I need to submit anything for the tdiu part of my claim. OOOOH well today starts a new chapter of my life after group therapy. Once again THANX for having me one more time. This place have helped me get through many miserable nights when insomnia reared it's ugly head after I wrote out my thoughts on here I was able to go to sleep so I guess venting helps

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If only it were that simple....

I been told by family and friends if I change my thoughts then my dreams will change.


Sorry you have to go through that Navy.

WTH. I just hate having to relive all the bad stuff all the time, don't they know that we just want to be left alone. Sorry for the rambling.

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SSD Doc just called me, and said that my PTSD exam for SSDI has been moved up to Jan 13, next Monday, instead of Feb 3. I am so nervous and he said that my wife can drive me to the appointment, but she can not go in examination room with me, WTH. I just hate having to relive all the bad stuff all the time, don't they know that we just want to be left alone. Sorry for the rambling.

It's KOOL I totally understand. The whole claim process will make you go bonkers good luck on your exam

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Just be yourself. Don't embellish but don't go in there with your "Life is Good" tee shirt on either. Things will go your way if you express yourself to the doc in the same manner you do with us. Good luck navy04.

LC

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MAN I am one dizzy camper. I went to the doctor yesterday. They gonna give me some motion sickness pills. She said it might dry the fluid up in my ears. Lord I hope it does I hate being this dizzy and nauseous. Yeah I tend to believe it could be the prazosin. What happens if I stop taking it then it seems to only work for a month or so so that means I would have to up my dose if the doctor tell me to that means I will prolly be extra dizzy. I gotta admit I'm so dopped up I don't have the energy to be a rough guy. So I basically stay home fill my room up with gadgets to keep my interest for the day. Man will I ever have better health it seems like IM GOIN down hill from where I'm at. OOOH well at least I got life insurance I ordered a red casket and I want to wear a brim godfather hat for my day of gooooing hooooome. Ooooooh well I can't lie I'm not as on edge as previous. I been relaxing around people more also little dgs use to run up to me and I would boot them to the moon because I thought they was coming to bite me guess what now I let them run up on me. I still don't like being around people my mind seems to drift to a dangerous side of me but over all these medicines besides side affects have done me more good than bad. GOOOD lord previous months I was a busy camper BEIN mr dumbo DOIN stuff I should not have done. Well hopefully my days will get better upon my road to peace love and harmony. :-)

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Well here I am today. My gal came home with a funky attitude and guess what it has passed to me. Nobody has cooked dinner. I just feel like punching holes in the walls. Which I'm not. I feel dizzy as hell numb mad and psychotic. So I'm just laying in bed by myself. My breathing is funny hands are shaky. I just received my meclizine for my dizziness a naseousness. Please do excuse me if these medicines rub me the wrong way and I come on here and go wild. This is my only outlet. I can't really talk to people that I know the things I tell them I don't believe they believe me. They think I'm making the stuff I say up. I swear I wish I was or that I woke up and I had a whole different life. It's like I'm walking on egg shells. It's just a matter of time before somebody test me. That's why I know I got to stay inside my home. I went to target it was amazing that all the different people it's wild I been in my house so long I be amazed at all the different types of people lurking around. Man oh man I look at social butterflies and wonder how do they love people so much they make friends with everybody if YALL met my brother he is the total opposite of me. He is like a public relations guy. How can we be from the same blood I wish I could be loving as him. People see me thinking IM a happy camper and guess what I'm far from that. IM a confused individual. I know for sure it's some people if I see them it will not be good. OOOOH well I'm still going to counseling and I'm dopped up on MEDS. Hoping for a brighter day

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