tdiu 100% Schedular Perm & Total - Glory To God! Thanks To Hadit.com!

[free_spirit_etc]

TS-

Congratulations!! You deserve it! You deserve it! You deserve it!

Free

[danang_1969]

Great news, Congratulations. You can have some relief now.

[sweettator]

Congratulations. I got my letter today. I didn't get anything for CHAMPVA but I'm qualified for it. I guess I will have to call them and apply for it. I have a 17 year old that will be going to college in 2009 and Chap 35 benefits are going to be a great financial relief. Arkansas laws I get my Game and Fish Liscense, property tax, and car liscense for free! Good luck and enjoy. Vicky

[luvHIM]

"Bottom line: I give the glory to God for showing He is still into Gideon victories - what is impossible with man is possible with God. Thank you Tbird for hadit and thank you members for your information, support, and help."

AMEN!!!!

CONGRATULATIONS! I AM TRUSTING GOD FOR A VICTORY, AS WELL. GOD BLESS!

[les]

I am so happy for you and yours! It gives me hope on my 4 year journey with the dro. Have a great life!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! Les

[Tbird]

great news all, the down after you get 100% is common, for many of us, kind of anti climatic, you have all this fight and adrenalin and you get a letter and it's all done, you just need to be aware that is happens to many of us and like any battle you need some time to decompress from it.

Too many days/nights bouncing off the walls so will try to be as coherent as possible -

I am too spun to edit this so I apologize in advance for the parts that don't make sense and any spelling and/or grammar issues.

Bottom line up front: the VA has awarded me 100% perm & total for my sc bipolar.

Back story short version:

- Original app several years ago - Service connection denied because the VA ignored medical evidence from 2 shrinks who treated me 30 years ago on active duty and said there was no evidence in my smrs even though they only got my reserve smrs (never said I was treated in reserves) and not my active duty smrs where I was actually treated.

- DAV sent in NOD, got fair C&P examiner who said there was plenty of evidence to link my current disorder with treatment the shrinks said I got in service. She also opinioned that I was "100% total social and occupationally impaired because I can't hold down a job due to symptoms of sc bipolar" and from that VA C&P medical opinion, the VARO rated me 50%.

- Sent in my own NOD (thanks hadit and vawatchdog) requesting 70% rating with 100% IU EED original application and include lengthy IMO (thanks Berta) from civilian shrink familiar with SS claims and very willing to review VA regs to understand the VA process (he was incredulous that their own examiner said I was 100% and they rated me 50% - he said SS would have been easier but I am well over 5 years from any employment and never applied for SS - just didn't know I was authorized to and the time limit has passed). I also get a statement in support of my claim with mi rating schedule symptoms on it from my PCP to counter the very selective statments from my treatment reports the VA had used in my 50% decision. Get my former employer to fill out the employer form for IU and send it and the IU form in as well w/ my NOD, which was nicely tabbed and highlighted (OCD finally does some good other than just making sure I have organized closets!).

- Get hooked up w/ VSO #4 who shepards my file through the second round of DRO NODs and, in a real shock to me and him as well, for the 1st time in the whole process, the VA actually read their regs which say before you look at IU to make sure the vet's not 100% schedular. Since all three medical professionals (VA C&P examiner, IMO psycholgist, PCP) state that I am 100% total occupational and social impaired, perm & total (with opinions to back it up showing symptoms at the height of mania that hit all but one of 100% schedular symptoms) since at least EED, the VA awards me 100% perm & total back to original application date.

- I don't believe it when DAV tells me (and the rep at this point is the only one I've trusted) because I can't believe it is really over since the VA first denied sc in the face of not 1 but 2 letters from shrinks who treated me on active duty; then after their own C&P examiner says I'm 100% because I can't keep a job they rate me 50%; that they have actually read the evidence and instead of rating me 70% and 100% IU perm & total, now they decide I am 100% perm & total. Go into some sort of mental fog that I can't describe or understand. Not my usual mental illness. Something strange. I'd read stuff like this on hadit before or it would have taken me totally by surprise, this emotional relief with no relief. The upset. The tears. The disbelief. The lingering fear that they'll take it away. All that and more that is hard to explain. Suffice it to say, I expected to be happy when it was over but was more upset getting the 100% news than ever before. Guess it's one thing to tell the VA that I believed I was 70% w/ a clear case of IU P&T and a whole nother somthing all together for them to say I was totally spun.

- Admin goes smoothly - 3 signatures take about a month, Decision letter in 6 wks or so, retro checkk deposited no problems. Weird emotional response from me for months, finally dissapating and back to my "normal" which is me bouncing between depression and mainia as usual w/out the VA stress or strange emotions after winning so I've gone back to trying to live in the murky middle of bipolar disorder. Decided to start seeing the civilian shrink who did the IMO because I can now afford it (I don't drive so going to the VA is out of the question and to be honest, I have no desire to deal w/ them).

OK, that's the short version, started a long version and then went back to short so will just include what else I wrote and try to wrap it up with some sense of order:

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Back Story Long Version:

Service Connection Denied - I applied several years ago and because I had contacted St. Louis before I applied and was told I had no smrs I searched for, and found online, the docs who treated me at the mental health clinic while I was on active duty 30 years ago and got them (a psychitrist and psyhologist) to write letters in support of my claim - which the VA chose to ignore despite the fact that one was working for the gov't and the other was still on active duty as a full bird (Colonel, 0-6). Medical statement not buddy statements but the VA denied sc.

Rated 50% because "your condition doesn't affect your ability to live independently" despite the C&P saying "YES" to the question about whether or not my sc mi affected my ability to live independently - got hooked up w/ the DAV (worked w/ 4 reps over the years: 1 absent no show, never returned calls; 1 real jerk who refused to give me their fax number; 1 nice guy w/ more mental problems that I have who couldn't keep my claim straight from others he was working on but did give me a good form and the stupid fax number; and 1 VSO who was my claim's advocate in the end and a good guy who knew his stuff) and the wrote a NOD (but didn't bother to send me a copy of it). Years pass, the VA asks for civilian medical records they already have, can't keep my zip code straight (freaking me out), they finally tell me I have to prove that the two shrinks were really who they said they so I'm supposed to send the VA their full names, DOB, and SSN. Like in this day and age of identity theft anybody is going to give that to me or any other veteran! Work it out so the Col works directly w/ DAV/VA to get his info to VA as well as verifying duty assignment of psychiatrist who's now unreachable so VA orders a C&P exam.

Found hadit along the way so had at least a clue what a C&P exam was but was still thrown for a loop - not used to spilling my guts to a total stranger and my mind locked up. Being depressed didn't help any but the examiner, who wrote down what I said pretty much ver batim. Then, in her opinion, after saying there was plenty of evidence to link my current bipolar with my mental health treatment in the military, she stated that I am "100% total social and occuaptionlly impaired because sc bipolar prevented me from maintaining employment" and she also spoke to the chronic since service (30 years ago) and severe nature of my illness.

Argue w/ DAV - VSO #3 wants me to accept the 50% (remember, the C&P examiner stated I was 100% with words clearly indicating perm & total) and request an increase to 70% and then, after who knows how long to get that, request 100% IU. By now I realize what a Charlie Foxtrot the whole VA process is and more importantly, if I am going to be in such a stressful fight then I want to fight for what's right which I thought was 100% IU from date of application. Vet rep feels strongly I stand a better chance of playing the game for the long haul and winning than NODing my original 50% for the truth. Well, I'm not wired for a long fight of bs games - if I was going to be in a long fight of bs games I wanted it to be for the truth and preserve my EED, which, because of hadit I even knew what a EED was. Plus, if I played it his way, by the time my c-file was reviewed again for 70% and ultimately 100% IU my C&P would be years old and after reading hadit I reazlied what a blessing my C&P exam was, especially w/ the VA's own examiner stating clearly that I was 100% due to unemployability, chronic and severe bipolar. In the end, against the vet rep's advice, we agree that I'm going to get an IMO and put in an NOD (which I write this time so I know what it says - thanks hadit and vawatchdog) requesting 70% and 100% IU. I quote the Mauerhan if they want to continue to insist that I don't have trouble with daily activities when I do and the examiner stated as such.

Because I cannot predict what my mood will be on any current or future date, having a DRO hearing was out of the question for me, it's all got to be on paper where I can have my spouse help me out and edit it over months. In person, if depressed, I can't think through the black fog that shrouds my soul and when manic can't sit still or carry on a coherent conversation and innerepisode look and act normal enough where it'd be hard to believe I had a serious mental illness and after the way the VA rater stated my symptoms were controlled by medication (which is a 10% rating criteria) which they were for all of 3 months until I had negative reactions again (long decades long history of adverse reactions to psych meds) I realized that if I were blessedly innerepisode during a DRO hearing that it would shot my case in the foot and by the same token, while I would certainly look crazy enough if manic I wouldn't be able to function in a hearing setting and if depressed, wouldn't care enough to get out of bed to go. No win for me w/ a hearing so it was all paper NOD, pages and pages of OCD paper NOD.

Years pass. Get VSO #4 toward the very end, good guy, keeps his cool when I lose mine over the stupidity of the system and the increasing wait, keeps me informed, returns phone calls. Calls me to give me the Decision news and is very kind when I completely flip out when he tells me I got the 100% schedular perm & total EED and I tell him I am not that crazy, I don't want to be that crazy, I just want to be 70% crazy w/ 100% IU (poor guy) and to go back and tell the DRO to redo it and make them take back the 100% schedular (thus, as my spouse gently pointed out later, illustrating that I just might BE 100% schedular) and give me 100% IU.

Spin out from winning (go figure) and have spent months trying to get back to normal, which for me, is crazy, but it's a crazy I understand a lot better than how I felt after I won my VA claim.

So, that's the short and long of it. Previously I posted a thank you by name to members of hadit and rather and get started on another section of this post, which I've been writing since yesterday, I will see if I can find it and post it as well.

Bottom line: I give the glory to God for showing He is still into Gideon victories - what is impossible with man is possible with God. Thank you Tbird for hadit and thank you members for your information, support, and help. You helped keep me as sane as possible during the years long process and give me a place to belong even if I'm not.