What Can I Tell My Doc About My Ptsd?

[MedicC]

So I was reading about PTSD tonight because quite frankly I sometimes feel like there is more going on the PTSD.

I am rated at 70% for PTSD currently. I am scared to death that if I am open and honest with my doctor about how I feel that he will say that I have some kind of personality disorder or mental problem and NOT PTSD. I am hoping that I can share with you guys a little of what I have been holding back and see if you think its ok for me to share this stuff with him and not have him think something else is wrong. I dont know how I am suppose to feel about having PTSD.

Also I really am not some freak. I dont know that I would ever act on some of the stuff I am talking about unless of course it changed to being legal then I might!

1. I really want to beat the crap out of every middle eastern person I see. Their voice pisses me off. I know most of them are really good people and I hope I don't offend any of them on here but I have the urge to beat the crap out of them with my fists. I don't want to shoot them or kill them at all, I just feel the urge to hurt them alot!

2. I hate people. All people.Only people in person. On the internet where I don't have to see people I like them. I don't trust anyone but I like nice people online. I think the best word to describe would be cynic.

3. I get mad alot! If you should know that the sky is blue but you think its orange. I want to scream and yell at you for being an idiot.

4. If Im riding with you and you are not watching the road. If your texting or looking out the side window then I want to rip you out of the car and put you in the truck so I can drive. And no you cant sit in the passenger seat because I dont trust you next to me.

5. Your a psychologist? I hate you, you are looking for ways to screw me with some diagnosis about small man part syndrone or something that can take the blame OFF PTSD.

6. I dont like medication. It makes me feel like Justin Bieber on crack! I do stupid stuff, have no clue if I want to have sex with my wife, play with my dog, watch a movie or if I just want to sit there and drool on myself.

7. If I have to press 1 for english and then I get Bob from Pakistan. I want to hang up the phone and stop giving that company money because I feel like they should no better then to outsource their call centers.

8. I get no excitement in anything. Its pointless to even try to do anything that I should enjoy. Its a waste of time.

9. I used to drink HEAVILLY. Now I cant touch the stuff! I decided I needed to control something so I chose to have control over that.

10. If I hear the words "trust me" from another shrink I am going to shove my foot so far up your 4th point of contact that you will tasting shoe leather for a month.

11. Sleep? Oh you mean that thing where you lay down and pretend like nobody can see you while you lay there with your eyes open watching every light or shadow or movement of any kind and then you stand up when its light out again?

These are things that I am feeling that i am not comfortable telling a doctor these things. I am wondering if it is ok to talk to them about this stuff or if #5 will come true if I try to share these thoughts with him. I have another appointment on friday and was hoping to know what was ok to talk about.

I dont mean to offend anyone but this is the only place that I feel I can get straight answers!

Thank you in advance

[Navy04]

Just be honest with the Doc, and the more you talk about anger towards the Afghan people and the Military, then he will list it as PTSD symptoms. Good luck and you will be alright bud. Keep us posted.

[Zomglawlz]

Your list is not much different than mine.

[john999]

It sounds like classic PTSD.

[Slowlane]

What is "4th point of contact"? I have a pretty good idea but never heard the expression before. Oh, and your list.....damn good.....I want to be like you!!! Slowlane

[Patrick428]

MedicC,

PTSD is a far cry from a Personality Disorder. PTSD is an induced mental disorder due to a experience that would be noted as beyond normal human experience and tends to be an event that is shocking or is unprecedented in average daily life. PTSD has aligned with it as many as 40+ associated mental and medical disorders. In the claims process it takes a Psychiatrist or a PH.D. level Clinical Psychologist to diagnose and form a nexus (relationshipt) between PTSD and any other associated problems. Sleep disorders, Anger, and Dissociative responses are typical of PTSD. Too many VA and private practice clinicians try to convince veterans they can cure PTSD. There is no cure for PTSD as it is a memory-based disorder, and there is no treatment that can erase a memory. What should be done in treatment is to help veterans with Quality of Life issues.

A Personality Disorder is a disorder of character. It usually presents itslef in early to late adolescence, but is not usually diagnosed until early adulthood. I would not worry about someone diagnosing you with a PD.

I noted your Item #5. I am a Clincial Psychologist and have been for nearly 30-years. I hope your experience with a not so well trained Psychologist was at best a singular event. Yes, there are a lot of Psychologist out there who should not be dealing with veterans with PTSD. I consider myself an exception as I did two tours in Vietnam as a Recon Marine, was wounded twice, and I am 100% P and T Scheduler plus SMC-S. Basically I am saying I had a life before Pstchology. I specialize in PTSD and never take the position with any veteran that PTSD is jsut a figment of the imagination. PTSD is real, and very terrifying. In therapy it takes time and patience in working with those suffering from PTSD.

I hope you take the opportunity to find a good therapist who KNOWS what they are doing, because it can be very helpful, and you can learn how to manage PTSD much better.

Patrick428

[MedicC]

Thank you everyone especially Patrick. 4th point of contact is an airborne term for what order your ass hits the ground. I have had social workers in the v.a. write in my file after a short visit that I have a personality disorder and then it gets brought up by doctors several times and they have to rule it out. Makes it hard to focus on the real problem. Even had a a social worker tell me I was bipolar becacause I was tired a lot. She wrote that in my records last year and I'm still being questioned even though the docs keep ruling it out. I truly hope that nobody has a list like mine because it us not fun to live with.