The FIRST thing you need to do..

[broncovet]

....After you get a disability rating is to ......drum rolll......

1.  Decide and choose wisely "who" if anyone you want to disclose this to:

     Here is why.  A Veteran recently posted (after his award):

Quote

My family either doesn’t give a shit, doesn’t understand or wants a piece of it. 

This is why you want to choose carefully EVEN in YOUR OWN FAMILY.  

     I regret telling my family.  Why?  Well my son blurted out, when I suggested he do a better job managing his money, "Yea, but Im not "suc**ing a government ti*&" so I dont have the money. 

It was my mistake.  First I should not have said that to a grown son.  And I shouldnt have told him I was 100 percent.  

    If you and a family member are comfortable "telling each other" how much you make, then fine.  But, if they expect YOU to reveal, and they want theirs kept private, then dont do it.  

    Its my advice "not" to tell your neighbor "unless" he is such a good friend he has also told you of his finances in DETAIL.  Ditto for other friends.  

    SOME REASONS:

1.  Disclosing your VA compensation can raise the "jealousy" flag.  (Gee, he gets 3000 a month for nothing, and I have to work for mine).  

2.  Disclosing your VA compensation can result in these people "reporting" you if your relationship goes south.  Example:  "He does not seem that hard of hearing to me.  Why he complains about my dog barking so how does he hear that?"     People, who are not audiologists or medical professionals (and even many medical professionals) "dont get" how our hearing loss affects life.  (You can hear the dog bark).   Yes.  I hear your dog.  Your dog barks in a frequency (low pitch sounds, while I have a high pitched hearing loss), which keeps me awake.  

Even doctors often do not understand how/why being unable to distinguish an "F" from a "T", for example.  ("F" is a hard letter to hear.  Missing "just one letter" in a sentence can put you into left field)   Example:  I once had a friend who called to tell me she had an email problem.   

"No problem!   I have some time, why dont I drop by and help you fix it!"   (She knows I am good with computers).  

She gets mad and hangs up.  I dont know why.  I must have not understood what she said.  (Doing word puzzles in my head)

That is it!!!   She doesnt have an email problem, she has a "FEMALE problem".  

     Its my advice to "Choose carefully" who you disclose your VA disability rating/income to.  If you dont tell them on Thursday, you can tell always tell them next week.  But its hard to "reel those words back in", as much as we would like to.    Tell your hadit family...These people have disclosed theirs!!!  

 

 

Edited January 18, 2020 by broncovet

[blahsaysme2u]

i love the way you word things man. 

[WomanMarine]

Good advise!

I have two sisters with the greenest eyes, it is painful.

I wasn't expecting this disability, as I had things yet to do. But now that I do, I have to make the best of it and deal with it. In the same token I feel so blessed that one of my worries is not financial. I hope to 'pay-it-forward' with this new found blessing, as I know others are not so fortunate or have more battles to endure.

Semper Fi!

[vetquest]

They say to keep your enemies close and your friends closer.  I had a good job and paid off my house before I was disabled from working.  Very few people know that my house is paid for because people react funny about that also.  

[paulstrgn]

40 minutes ago, vetquest said:

Very few people know that my house is paid for because people react funny about that also.  

That is so very true. At work I see so many people get jealous when someone gets a promotion, why can't they just be happy for them. This is why I also tell my wife not to let people know when she buys something nice, instead of being happy for them they say something nasty instead. I just hate that.

I am not mad at those who are super wealthy, in fact I am happy for them. I just wish I was as smart or as lucky as them to have the same...hahaha But I would not wish them ill because they are luckier than me. I am thankful for what I have.

Now if I did not have kids I could be very wealthy…hahaha

[GBArmy]

WomanMarine Pay-it-forward is a great concept. I really try to not dwell on our misfortunes, healthwise. If you have your eyes open, it is so easy to see someone every day who is so much worse off than you. If you convert that  "whoa-is-me" stuff into trying to make this guy feel a little better today, not only does he have a better day, but you do to. If more people tried this, the world would be a better place. Sounds corny, I know, but that's just how I role.

[awgv001]

12 hours ago, broncovet said:

  If you and a family member are comfortable "telling each other" how much you make, then fine.  But, if they expect YOU to reveal, and they want theirs kept private, then dont do it.  

    Its my advice "not" to tell your neighbor "unless" he is such a good friend he has also told you of his finances in DETAIL.  Ditto for other friends. 

I genuinely felt this, as I was reading...

I'd even be hesitant to review my own Will around family, as to prevent getting a hit put on me.

I'm fortunate enough to have at least one person who understands, doesn't "want a piece of it" -  and instead hopes that when I am given justice that it will aid me as it is meant to.

The bitterness is real.

I wouldn't wish for anyone to have to endure the journeys we have all been on here.

Time is money, but money is NOT time.